The Prince Of Whales (19) The Civil Liberties Unions of the UN trust territories of Pacific Islands also claimed that some of the prisoners were legal green card holders and genuine US citizens by all definitions. But the claimants could not genuinely identify their clients in spite of all legal documentations. There are about sixty Originals and sixty-one Clones in the prison camp. The UN special guards have run all the additional tests and prepared individual files of all the Originals and the Clones. Detective Bermann and lieutenant Boer took the assistance of the local police department and further arrested the other bad guys related to the prisoners in one way or other. The media men are dying to see Bermann and Boer. They assured the media men and said, ‘you can wait for another week until we figure out a way to identify the genuine ones. Or you have choice. You can arrange an international press conference at the most secured place in the town at your own risk and responsibility. And we will try our level best and present one Original and one Clone just to introduce the new problem in the identifying process. Moreover this is the matter of huge money and high risks and security as well. Make up your minds and let me know’. The media men agreed to bear the expenses and responsibilities of security and rushed to make advance arrangements for the international press conference at Pearl Harbor Dome the most secured meeting place. Detective Bermann and lieutenant Boer took a deep breath again and started their further activity. They ceased all the bank accounts and assets of all the convicted criminals including the MexSp Foundation new board of trustee new members and the new chairman. While the judicatory process is in its snail-paced acceleration Detective Bermann and lieutenant Boer started serious thinking about Dr. Bran’s identity. They questioned Dr. Bran-Clone several times but failed to get the answers. Dr. Bran-Clone was programmed to give all confusing answers to the questions. He was programmed to answer the questions by irrational questions in a pseudo-Socratic bigot method. All the available identity details and descriptions including the genetic code history scientifically suited Dr. Bran-Clone. Bermann and Boer thought that he is the Dr. Bran the original. Bermann and Boer finally called Boris and explained every thing about the prisoners and especially about Dr. Bran-Clone and his confusing answers. Boris is particularly sharing his resurrected life with all the Island resorters. He is giving instructions to the filmmaker’s team. He is wholeheartedly enjoying his third honeymoon with Eliza on Island thirteen as he promised her twenty years ago. They maintained the custom of celebrating the honeymoon once in every twenty years. Boris is in his sixties but existentially looks like a forty-year youth. He said to Bermann and Boer, ‘it seems to me that Dr. Bran’s stream of consciousness is flowing in all the Ibtos body members. But the fullness of Bran’s mind is made flesh in his Clone. You have to ask him about Dr. Bran’s Norns: the three females past, present and future who had shaped his life. I think I have a plan. We must take the matter of my resurrection to the Hawaiian newspapers first. Then we must arrange a press meet and give the other shocking news to see the reactions. Anyway we will see you before noon. Bye’. Bermann said to Boris, ‘in that case we have to personally see all the Hawaiian newsagents when you come. We will wait for you at the Famous Thai Restaurant and we can decide what to do about this dilemma. See you soon’. Bermann and Boer went to the prison camp and started the questioning session with new vigor. They asked Dr. Bran-Clone all the details about his birth, childhood, education, boy friends, girl friends, parents, love affairs, marriage, children and nature of his job, his scientific achievements and all the past incidents of his life. Dr. Bran-Clone started telling his story like a digital audiotape with the following details. - You human beings are always amazing. You are time bound and interested in keeping your monocle history. But I acknowledge the dilatational space-time continuum process and yet have no time consciousness at all. - Before the evolution of the conscious world my father and I are one. I am in my father and he is in me. Therefore I said I am from the beginning of the world. - The entire outside world is only in my mind. I am incompatible and irrefutable. I am solipsistic and idealistic. I am the everlasting pistil of the united Ibtos carpels. - I am the great legendary King Bran. I am the omnificent Creator Brahma Fowl. I am Semiramis the omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent mother of all life. - I am the gynandrous Hermaphrodite the holy gay-divine. I became flesh in order to save the flesh from thanatophobia. I am all in all and I live in all. What else you want to know about me? I am the alpha and omega of life. - Like the floating water in the river I keep on dying and living at the same time. You think you see me now but you don’t’. Bermann helplessly looked at Boer and said to Dr. Bran-Clone, ‘who is your father and where is he now and how to contact him? Can you take us to him? We immediately need him to treat a mental patient. You are the only one to help us. You can call your father now’. Dr. Bran-Clone continued his theosophical homily and said, ‘my father is always with me. I told you that he lives in me. You are looking at him right now. He lives in me and works through me. But I must take the patient’s blood sample to Ibtos. There I can clone him or her right away. Then the patient can continue his life in the clone. If a single original dies it can live on in the infinite clone children forever. Without any further delay let’s take his blood samples to Ibtos before the original dies. When the original’s blood sample cries out to my father, he will surely give it an abundant life. And it can’t die any more. We have seen it with our own eyes. We have been seeing the father giving lives to thousands every day’. Boer asked Dr. Bran-Clone, ‘did you do this recently? How many Clones are there altogether? Where are they now? Can you take us to them?’ Dr. Bran-Clone said, ‘only my father knows about certain things. No one in Ibtos not even me knows such classified details except my father’. Bermann asked him, ‘do you guys believe in lycanthropy? Can you become a wolf now? Did your father become a wolf and leave you without giving you any further instructions? If you cooperate with us we will help you to get out of these charges’. Dr. Bran-Clone sharply stared at them like an angry dhole and coolly said to them, ‘I can see many wolfhounds and the newfoundlands in you guys’. Bermann and Boer finished their session with Dr. Bran-Clone and briefly checked with the prison camp in charge. The claimants are still submitting their documentations and trying to convince him about the prisoners somehow related to them. Bermann and Boer left the prison camp and rushed to the local Police Chief’s office as they have received an urgent message from him. The FBI guys are patiently waiting for them in the Police Chief’s office. Bermann and Boar went inside and the Chief handed over the sealed covers to them after the brief introductions and explanations. Bermann and Boer understood that the FBI has taken over the case and that they are released from their public relations office duty. They opened the sealed envelopes and signed the acknowledgment copies and said goodbye to the chief. They also wished good luck to the FBI guys. The Police Chief blandly said to Bermann and Boer, ‘you cannot walk out from the duties just like that. You have to take me and these gentlemen to the prison camp and see that Mr. Dukh, Mr. Nick, Mr. Rodrigo, Mr. Willy and Mr. Zuloaga are handed over to these gentlemen’. Bermann and Boar explained the problem in identifying the prisoners. But the Police Chief ignored all those suggestions. Bermann and Boer urbanely said to the FBI guys, ‘gentlemen! Be ready with all your papers and their ID documentations for ten: five Originals and five Clones’. The FBI guys looked at the Police Chief with question mark faces. The Chief impatiently said, ‘they just want five prisoners and not ten. Now let’s go. This will be your last assignment as the great public relations officers. Then you can go home and relax’. Bermann and Boer followed the Police Chief and the FBI guys to their helicopter. They came to the prison camp. After the introductions and formalities the UN in charge took the Chief and the FBI guys to a special room. The long and big room was used for interrogating or brainwashing the accused during the time of King Kamehameha I. The UN special guards handcuffed the eight prisoners and brought them to the same room. The FBI guys looked at the prisoners with double vision and thought that the prisoners had some kind of esotropic, exotropic and double vision sickness. The Police Chief hopefully took out the paper and read ‘Mr. Dukhobors the Federal officer and the commissioner’. The guards produced Mr. Dukh Original and Mr. Dukh Clone and asked them to identify the right one between the two prisoners. The Police Chief looked at the prisoners with his new cross-eye effect. Mr. Dukh Original yelped like a dog and said, ‘its me Damn it!’ Seeing this Mr. Dukh-Clone yowled like a wolf in a high pitch and said, ‘its me Damn you!’ The Clones were programmed to be the best involuntary imitators of the Originals in all situations. The Police Chief then looked at the paper and read aloud ‘a small mole on the right thigh’. Mr. Dukhobors quickly undressed himself and showed his big congenital hairy mole. Mr. Dukh-Clone also showed the similar mole. The Clones were made with exactness in all areas like their Originals. The Police Chief read with a quivery voice ‘blood group AB’. The guards showed the certified AB samples of both the Original and the Clone. The Police Chief read ‘the right eye –2.5 and the left eye –2.0. The guards checked and produced the same eyesight prescriptions of both the Original and the Clone. The Police Chief cursorily read ‘height 1.70 meters and weight 200 pounds’. The guards checked and gave the same records of the Original and the Clone. The Police Chief began to perspire in the old smelling room. He searched his back pockets to find his handkerchief. He wore his underwear and the trousers backwards. He could not find his back pockets. He noticed that his supposed back pockets are the front pockets at present. He remembered his latest bathroom troubles to figuring out the right side of his underwear. The UN in charge suddenly said to the Police Chief and the FBI guys in his thundering voice, ‘gentleman! Choose one and leave one now. Come on! Who’s next?’ The Police Chief tried very hard to point his finger to one of them with his exotropic and esotropic visionary effect. Mr. Dukhobors the Original ejected his eyeballs and gazed at the Police Chief and roared like the lioness and said, no damn it! Its not him’. The Clone did it again. The Police Chief quickly retrieved his finger and kept strict silence like a mute swan. He did not dare to point his finger towards either of them any more. The smart FBI guys looked at the Original and the Clone with their last hopes. Mr. Dukh Original and Mr. Dukh-Clone both stared at them and grunted like a giant walruses. The FBI guys gave up their hope and signaled the Chief to make a move. The UN in charge said to them again, ‘gentlemen! Make your decisions quickly. I have other claimants waiting’. The Police Chief and the FBI guys could not choose their clients and effetely returned to the reception. Bermann and Boer were lightheartedly smoking cigars and offered a cigar and the lighter to the Chief. He does not like any one to smoke in his presence. They knew that. But they intentionally did that to tease the Chief. They all came to the helicopter and returned to the Chief’s office without saying a word to anyone while Bermann and Boer were still teasing the Police Chief. They came to the Police Chief’s office. Bermann and Boer started their car and said goodbye to the FBI guys. The Chief tried to talk to them. But they already left for the famous Thai restaurant for their brunch. The Chief said to the FBI guys, ‘gentlemen! I need to take care of some thing now. Please excuse me. If you want to talk to those guys go to the Famous Thai Restaurant just around the corner. They often go there to brunch’. The FBI guys nodded their heads and started jogging towards the Famous Thai Restaurant. It’s not their lunchtime yet. They walked and trekked around the marine beach and came to the Famous Thai Restaurant after one hour. In the meantime Bermann and Boer went to the dock and received Boris and Eliza. They directly went to their bayside guesthouse. Boer saw the FBI guys on the way. He thought that the FBI guys liked the Famous Thai Restaurant. He did not mention about them to Bermann at all. The bayside guesthouse attendants have been waiting for Boris and Eliza. Shea already called the head cook and told him to prepare dinner for Bermann and Boer also. The attendants were very glad to see resurrected Boris and Eliza Jacobsons. They enjoyed serving the delicious kosher luau with all the other special dishes to Jacobsons and the guests. They exchanged the news during the long lunch session. Bermann and Boer explained to Boris that they are off the case and the FBI is now dealing with the case. Boris then described the plan. According to the plan they first called the newsagents and told them that they were off the case and the press meet has been officially cancelled. The newsagents apprehensively said that they had already made all arrangements at the Pearl Harbor Dome and it could not be cancelled without losing the paid money. Bermann and Boer directed them to the local Police Chief and the FBI. The local Police Chief and the FBI guys told them that they are not ready for such a rushy pushy press conference and they are not responsible in any way for the loss of their money paid to the Pearl Harbor Dome. They asked the newsagents to hold Bermann and Boer responsible for their loss. The newsagents got back to Bermann again and told the situation. Then Boris said to Bermann, ‘now is the time to tell the newsagents either to cover my resurrection news or to place the advertisement about it on the front page’. Bermann and Boer told the newsagents about this alternative. The newsagents checked with the editors of all newspapers. The editors agreed to place the advertisement on the title page of tomorrow’s papers this evening despite all the pressmen risks. It is the voguish fashion of the newspapers in Hawaii to supply tomorrow’s newspapers today evening. All the editors agreed to place the advertisement on the title page with an extra cost. The full-page advertisement emphasized the most thrilling news about the miraculous resurrection of Boris Jacobson as follows: - All friends, wellwishers and the relatives of Boris Jacobson are welcomed to the reception party tomorrow 2-3 pm at the Pearl Harbor Dome by reserving the seating arrangements. - Boris Jacobson will directly come to the Dome along with his wife Eliza. All the guests will have special lunch with the Jacobsons from 2 to 3 pm. - After lunch there will be a public interview with resurrected Boris the master survivalist of the century. - The publishers, newsagents, authors and the media men can participate in the conference from 3-5 pm by making advance reservations for the priority seating arrangements. - Interested parties, individuals and agencies should contact Sophia at Pearl Harbor Dome and make reservations for priority seating. The newsagents also covered the miracle resurrection news on the cover page, as they already knew about Boris’ mishap. The Hawaiian news agency requested the new local Police Chief Mr. Aardvark Chuckwood to handle the security responsibility of the Pearl Harbor Dome. Boris officially hired Bermann and Boer for his personal protection. Boris explained his plan to Bermann and Boer. He said, ‘Dr. Bran will certainly show up. He will be in any disguise. He may change his total appearance. He will certainly try to kill me again’. Bermann thought that Bran might have visited Eliza during these twenty years in disguise. He asked Eliza to recall and draw different visitors’ faces. In the past Dr. Bran visited Eliza several times as a news reporter, cameraman and publisher. All the visitors were African-Americans. Every one of them had a strange Pidgin English accent and spoke bechedemer English. Eliza recalled and drew pictures and showed to them. Bermann and Boer keenly looked at the pictures. Boer scanned and transmitted all those figures to their new office. Boris told them to immediately make arrangements to bring Matthew, Sam, Joan, Wilma, the good ninja guys and the Thalmulic guys. Detective Bermann and Boer contacted Island thirteen and described the situation to Matthew and Sam. They are all still enjoying their first honeymoon. Shea convinced them and arranged the special aircraft with all permits. Bermann’s new office staff arranged all the required legal identity formalities for the Thalmulic guys. The plane left for Hawaii with the good ninjas, Mathew, Cathy, Sam, Joan, Wilma and the Thalmulic fishermen.
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Copyright © 2001 Shmuel Yacobi |