Perceptions (15)
I was woken up in semi-slumber and Pete untied me, bringing me to my feet after removing both my shoes. Barely able to walk I was half-carried to another bedroom where I saw some strange makeshift appliances on the wall and dangling from the ceiling. To each one of these, I was tethered in spite of my condition. They took more pictures and movies and laughed and made feel and look sexy. They stretched me, squeezed me, and bound me in all sorts of positions. Half the night must have passed away, but I wasn’t tired. Doing all that they could with me, and I doing all that was asked of me, we finished on a high. ‘Time to leave now, Lara. Are you okay?’ ‘Brilliant!’ I answered, leaning heavily on a wall with my vision out of focus, and waiting on them. ‘Get all our stuff together while I take Lara out of here. I’ll contact you tomorrow evening and we can discuss what we do with all the takes.’ ‘Right.’ ‘This should bring us record hits; she’s the best we’ve ever had.’ Listening, I felt totally elated, like a winner. ‘Come on, Lara. Let’s go.’ The man wound an arm around my back and helped me to the stairway. ‘Now be careful. We don’t want an accident at this time of night, do we?’ ‘No,’ I mumbled. ‘Pete - get rid of her clothes and bits and go home when you’re done. Make sure nothing’s left.’ ‘Right.’ I was naked and barefoot, but I didn’t care. The cold rush of air was invigorating although not helpfully reviving as we stepped out of the house to be greeted by a backdrop of fading night. The man told me to shush as I started to hum while we walked towards his parked car. It was a nice car. I recognised it as a BMW. It could have been red or black - difficult to tell in this light. But the number plate was as clear as water. I giggled at the thought. Clear as water. It was the water they’d given me that was making me so happy and giddy, not to mention the bondage and the fucking. ‘I really enjoyed myself tonight,’ I whispered. ‘I’d like to thank you guys very much.’ I was put into the passenger seat and belted in. He entered the driver’s seat and turned to make sure I was comfortable. ‘I don’t even know your name, but I’d really love to do this again one evening. What do you say? Next Saturday night?’ ‘Shush, Lara.’ He started the engine, and we sped off hastily into the night. ‘I live over -’ ‘I know where you live, and I know a short-cut.’ ‘Goody. I’m getting a little sleepy now, I have to admit.’ ‘No problem, I’ll wake you when we get there.’ My head sank into the headrest but my eyes wouldn’t close. I was watching the whole journey as we drove through the quiet streets, passing other cars only occasionally. In a short while there were no more houses. The main road seemed to go through woodland. I didn’t know how long we’d been driving but a glance at the clock in the centre console read 4.35am. What a wonderful time to go driving. No traffic, no people. I liked it. The car began to slow and eventually we pulled over. The car rumbled over some rough terrain before it came to a complete rest just behind a thicket of trees. ‘One more fuck in a lay-by before you take me home?’ He laughed. ‘Sure.’ He opened the door and leapt out of the car, coming around the other side to my door. I’d already unbuckled the seatbelt. ‘Good girl. Come out.’ ‘Give a girl a hand. Who put the man in "gentleman?"’ ‘Come on, Lara. Stop messing.’ He pulled me out firmly. ‘Ow,’ I complained as broken twigs and other things hurt my feet. ‘No shoes, remember?’ He scooped me up in his powerful arms and carried me into the denser foliage. In the distance I could hear an owl and some other birds squawking angrily at our nocturnal encroachment. I leaned on him enjoying his warmth and presence. ‘This is nice, just here, isn’t it?’ He stopped. To go any further would be dangerous in the dark. I doubted that he could see any further than me. ‘I can’t see a bloody thing - can you?’ He seemed to agree, as he put me down. Still holding me, he peered into my eyes while his left hand came round and fondled my right breast. ‘Goodbye beautiful, promiscuous Lara.’ I giggled. ‘Are you leaving me here?’ ‘No, my dear. You are leaving me.’ Frowning curiously, I watched him produce a pair of surgeon’s gloves from one of his pockets. ‘Getting cold?’ ‘No.’ Wearing them, his hands glided with a sensational rubbery feeling up my stomach and over my breasts and ending at my neck. It was only when his thumbs started to squeeze that a smidgeon of terror crept into my mind. The cold air was beginning to aid my recovery; the shot of undiluted fear killed the haze entirely. I screamed, but it was brief. Throttled, no sound could escape from my lips except for snippets of broken croaking. I fought him as darkness descended on me. All sound evaporated except for that of my racing heart. Suddenly he stopped, to my relief, his head snapping to the left sharply. As I began to reel, he smothered by mouth and nose with one hand and using his other, he grabbed me by the waist and backed himself into a tree. I heard a distant crunch of cracking twigs even as my mind was switching off. A voice echoed through the trees, and I heard a furious muttering in my ears. ‘Sorry, Lara, I can’t wait,’ he whispered, as he turned me around to face him once more, and slammed my head hard against a tree trunk with a restraining hand tightly over my mouth. I saw the glint of what must have been a knife. I never saw where he got if from, but I knew where it was going. I let out a scream despite his best intentions and then I felt a curiously numbing sensation accompanied by a perverse kind of warmth dripping down my side. The knife had pierced my flesh. My legs started to crumble as I gradually lost consciousness. One more time I felt the blade plunge; and then he let me go, his face pitiless as he watched me sink to the ground. Slowly, the initial pain of my wound dissipated as death and overwhelming darkness came to take me. No windows, no doors. No fears. Her precious safe zone contained everything she required; all she’d ever need again. Beautifully tiled, the bathroom featured a theme of trees, a distant mountain, a running brook, and a dusky full moon. All around the leaf-covered floor stood tall and slender flickering rose-coloured candles, providing an ambiance, an aid, to forgetting the past. This was it; the perfect haven, this dimly-lit fortification that offered peace and solitude. At the centre of it all was a white heart-shaped bath with golden taps. It was filled with piping hot water that steamed and soothed away all traces of her aches and pains, as she lay immersed in scented soapsuds up to her chin. Lara sponged her breasts with a relaxed and calm assurance, no longer troubled by the terror and horror of this mad world. Her eyes were half shut, her breathing shallow and composed. She was luxuriating in her heavenly isolation. No one could harm her now, for no one could penetrate this self-built barrier of security. So she believed - until a phantom figure emerged through the wall in front of her bearing her own face. Lara shuddered in the water, shocked. ‘Who are you?’ she cried out. ‘How did you get in here?’ ‘Get out of the bath and come with me!’ ordered her double, ‘Why?’ retorted Lara, leaning forward to re-claim the escaped bath sponge. ‘You can’t stay here. You think you can hide indefinitely?’ ‘Why not? Who says? No one can make me do anything any more.’ ‘Others are depending on you. Your own life depends on it. Come with me while there’s still time.’ ‘No.’ ‘I can’t leave you here. You’ll die.’ ‘I’m already dead.’ ‘Not yet.’ ‘Then I’ll die soon. Peacefully!’ ‘I can’t let you, Lara.’ ‘You can’t force me. I’m not leaving. Who are you to tell me what I can do?’ ‘Others will die, too. You must help them.’ ‘Why should I? Who was there for me when I needed help?’ ‘You’re bitter, and you have every right to be. I know how you feel.’ ‘I have no feelings. Not any more.’ ‘You’re wrong.’ ‘How would you know that? Just because you look like me?’ ‘I am you, Lara. I’m your subconscious. I’m in here with you, where you buried us.’ Lara wavered. ‘I don’t understand. Do us a both a favour and leave.’ ‘You don’t recognise me - how could you when I’m wearing your face? I’m Mark. We met outside. Do you remember?’ ‘Outside? Mark? You’re confusing me. You’re not making any sense. Look, you’re blowing out my candles. Go away and leave me alone.’ Mark/Lara looked about, searching for a forceful weapon of persuasion. ‘How can I convince you to leave this place?’ ‘You can’t. It’s that simple. I don’t want to leave here. I’m staying - that’s final.’ ‘That isn’t the attitude I was expecting. You’re too young to die - that’s what you told me.’ ‘When did I say that?’ Lara was suddenly less confident. ‘In the hospital where our immortal spirits met and you were crying; you were hurt and confused, and you told me that you didn’t want to die. You met Sonia there, too. We tried to help you.’ ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ ‘Lara, I’ve seen your last memories, experienced them myself. I know what happened to you. But you mustn’t let it beat you. Be strong: I know you want to live. Fight Death, and help the doctors save you.’ ‘Is there any point? I’m happy being here.’ ‘This isn’t the Lara I knew; she wouldn’t behave like this. She loved life. You’ve already been in here too long. Don’t you understand? You’re dying and your memories are fading. The subconscious and the spirit will be the last things to go - that’s both you and I - and when your brain ceases to function we’re dead.’ Lara was no longer so content in the bath. Doubts had begun to creep in. ‘You said your name was Mark? How did you get inside of me? What do you want?’ ‘That’s more like it,’ said Mark/Lara, encouraged by her show of interest. ‘I was there when your body started to recall it’s spirit from the dead - you, Lara. But yours wasn’t the only spirit close by. Both Sonia and myself were drawn in, but at the lost instant I was able to force Sonia away. Pulled in moments after you, I was able to become you. Your memories of the last days of your life suddenly became mine, too. Somehow I was able to retain my own identity. I know who I am, but I also know everything about you; and I know you want to live. Don’t give up. You have everything to live for. You can forget everything that happened once you’ve told the Police. You can carry on with your life.’ ‘What about you?’ ‘Ah… that’s where my knowledge stops. Hopefully your mind and body will reject this second entity, or we’ll be locked together in one body.’ ‘Multiple personalities?’ ‘Perhaps, but multiple deaths for sure, if you don’t leave with me now.’ ‘Will there be much pain?’ The anguish on Lara’s face was plain to see. ‘That’s life,’ Mark/Lara replied, with a shrug. ‘Think of your parents and your friend Jo, think of how they’ll react if you die. And think of those two psychos getting away with murder, unless you do something. Come on, Lara. You don’t want to die. Let’s get out of here together.’ Lara stood up in the bath, wearily. Her body dried instantly. The bath beneath her vanished, as did all the candles and the bathroom itself. Lara stood in black; a void. Mark/Lara stood opposite her. Both of them held out an arm and linked hands. My ears rang with the sound of my name, obliging me to prise open my scrunched eyes and confront the world. I met with the vision of a youthful angel. ‘Mark? Mark, can you hear me? Can you see me? Mark?’ I took a moment before I uncurled from the foetus position, and my angel rose with me from her kneeling position, her eyes remaining fixed on my face. ‘I thought I was dead. It was so real.’ My hand reached instinctively for the knife wounds, and the absence of pain and substance of flesh combined to bring me to my senses, such as they were. ‘Sonia?’ She smiled at me. ‘Hi. I thought we’d lost you.’ ‘Where am I?’ ‘Don’t you remember? The hospital. Look. There’s Lara.’ Still surrounded by the three doctors. It came back to me in a clear flash - the inflicted terror, the violence, the torment and abuse. Poor Lara. Those bastards. ‘We have to stop them.’ ‘Who?’ ‘The men who put her here.’
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