AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (17) Anywhere The Wind Blows (Poetry) Just a short poem about moving on. [81 words] Can We Get A Wild Animal (Children) Childrens picture book [131 words] Dear Valentine (Poetry) Valentines Day poem to a girl I like. [171 words] Gonna Fly (Songs) Folky country loner type song. [92 words] It Used To Be Okay (Songs) A song that the verse writing was never finished, maybe never even started. [99 words] I've Been A Fool (Songs) Bluesy. First two verses of new song, verse, chorus and bridge to come, from where I don't know yet. Help [56 words] Rather Be Alone (Songs) -Country twangy song [140 words] Roofus (Part 1) (Children) Story of 10 year old boy, his trusty assistant, and a long day of mishaps. [885 words] Roofus (Part 2) (Children) Childrens [1,305 words] Roofus (Part4) (Children) -Childrens story [1,345 words] Roxy The Mambo Monkey (Children) Childrens Book. Rhymes, rhymes and more rhymes, I just cant stop them. [599 words] South Side Of Town (Songs) Lonely country style ballad. [237 words] Summertime In California (Songs) Song about summer day in California. [125 words] Take Me To The City (Songs) Another slow mellow tune [77 words] Waiting There (Songs) Another mellow song [86 words] You And I (Summer Sky) (Songs) Mellow little song or poem about an old friend who's gone now. [57 words] Your Lovers Dreams (Songs) Old style spacey rock, somewhere between Riders on the Storm, TB Sheets and Sympathy for the Devil.(obviously nowhere near them) [97 words]
Roofus (Part 3) Patrick Fell
An astronaut suit.
Not only does it look really cool, functionally it's a perfect fit for the job at hand.
Big puffy gloves, for branch moving. The large helmet, with face shield, provides
excellent protection from branches, thorns and the odd spider web here and there.
Padded elbows and knees will come in handy, in case some crawling, or falling,
is required. And the best thing of all,
if there is a sudden loss of gravity, I'll be covered.
Rothchild "Rocket-man" Buzzler, "The Worlds Most Famous Astronaut
Investigator In History" is on the job! Hmmm... our astronaut dosn't remember
it being this difficult to walk in his spacesuit. It's a little wobbly and a bit tippy.
The boots are heavy and the sound effects inside the helmet are a bit disorienting.
But he must push on.
...As he makes his way across the vast, barren expanse of this unknown planet,
he comes across something odd. It looks like old, shredded pieces of cloth,
maybe some clothing from an long since gone ancient alien civilazation.
"Rocket-man" bends down to get a closer look, yes, definetly, some form of clothing.
At that moment he hears something. It's hard to make out,
because of the oxygen sound effects in his helmet, but there is something out there.
Turning his oxygen off could be dangerous in an unknown atmosphere
but not knowing what that sound is could be worse.
A flip of a switch a turn of a knob and voila. Now he can clearly hear that sound.
It sounds like...like....growling....... GROWLING??? ...YEEOUCH!!!!!!!!!
Time out.
Okay, okay, rookie mistake. Our astronaut, in hind sight,
should have awoken his trusty assistant from her nap,
before putting the suit and helmet on.
But she just looked so content.
It was the first time she had ever multi-tasked. Chewing, on the last
new lounge chair cushion, while simultaniously drooling, shedding and snoring.
He didn't have the heart to wake her. Oh, he wanted to.
And at this moment he sure wish he had.
And let me give you junior astronauts a tip.
Unless your acually going into outer space, rethink the space suit gloves!!!
They are bulky, they are big, and extremity dexterity is not what the're designed for.
And believe me, when your assistant is biting the seat out of your space suit
and you need to get your helmet off quick, you are going to
need extreme extremity dexterity.
Okay, time in.
YEEOUCH!!!! ROXY, ROXY, IT'S ME, STOP BITING!!
As the helmet,finally, goes flying off, she figures out it's me.
And at this point you'd think I was safe,right? Yeah, me too.
My assistant thinks not.
She thinks she's inventing a new game called, "Drag The Spaceman Around
By The Seat Of His Spacesuit." This seems to be a variation some chew toy
games I've seen. But to acually be the chew toy, (or as I refer to it, the "rag-doll", )
well that puts a new twist on a game, that I now, no longer care for.
As the flipping and twirlling and twisting and dragging subsides into a
couple of half-hearted yanks,
the washing machine like ride comes to an end.
Lucky for me, my assistant tires easily.
"Rocket-man" must now begin the prosess of clearing his head and regrouping.
"Where am I", he wondered, as he looked around the backyard,
in a mixture of disbelief and dread ?
To the casual observer the backyard now looks like some bazzar rummage sale
of old torn up clothing, feathers, lawn furniture and astronaut supplies.
A mess that would have to be dealt with, to be sure, but, right now, there are,
"bigger fish to fry".
Time out.
Who comes up with these sayings and cliches?
"Slow and steady wins the race?" That only worked once.
Didn't the hare fall asleep? Unless track stars and Nascar drivers have a
sudden outbreak of narcelepsy, it doesn't make sense.
"It's raining cats and dogs?" That seems so limiting. Why not,
"it's raining everything but the kitchen sink?" When I was five, I asked my dad
for a bike. "Thats gonna cost an arm and a leg", he said.
Knowing a bike wouldn't be much fun after that, I asked,
"what's a yo-yo gonna run me?"
And how about, "there's more than one way to skin a cat?"
Besides the obvious, "why factor", I didn't know there was even one way.
I sure hope none of my neighbors came up with that one.
Point being, they rarely fit the occasion or make much sense.
Okay, time in.
No more Tom Foolery, thats enough dilly dallying, for Petes sake,
this investigation is heading up a creek without a paddle.
It's time to get all our ducks in a row and put our nose to the grind-stone.
To be top notch detective, you need to use your mind, you need the
tools of the trade and you need good, solid leads, but......
Sometimes, things don't go as planned. In fact, a lot of times, things don't go
as planned. In many investigations, the trail gets cold or the leads dont pan out.
It's part of the detective game.
But, time, teaches us to evolve and adapt to our ever-changing enviorment.
As good detectives we learn, early on, that we may have to alter our plans
now and then, to keep up with the always changing landscape around us.
It's not always what we want and sometimes we'll stomp our feet and
voice our protest, but as circumstances change, which they inevetably will,
so must plans. We learn to go with the flow. It helps us grow and learn.
My plan is about to change right now.
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