ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
Aged 75 -- presently writing third novel. Background in journalism, television. [February 2010]
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (6) Allergies (Poetry) Poem -- hopefully amusing. [214 words] [Comedy] Celebrity Quest (Poetry) Poem about the celebrity culture [142 words] I Need To Win The Lottery (Poetry) A bit of fun [240 words] My Britain (Poetry) Food special to Britain [92 words] Quest For Love (Poetry) A lyric for a song [127 words] [Drama] The Light We Saw (Poetry) - [114 words] [Romance]
Knee High To A Grasshopper David C Garland
Knee high to a grasshopper
by D.C Garland
Knee high to a grasshopper, that�s how I used to be, But I�m much taller now that I�ve reached sixty-three, My family�s genes determined the pace at which I grew Trouble is they didn�t work until I turned sixty two.
It matters not that I am wee as Scots are apt to say For I am English, through and through, and wee I do all day. And that�s because my bladder�s small, incontinent that�s me, Without warning, clear the way, for the nearest lavatory.
Being small and diuretic is a combination I deplore Instead of Pinot Grigio, I�ve switched to Pinot More. Rather than a pint of beer to satisfy my thirst, I sip a little eau-de-vie until I�m fit to burst.
Small is beautiful I like to say and one I oft recite Whenever someone�s being rude about my obvious lack of height. I merely smile, stand up straight and look them in the knees. From way down here it�s hard to see the forest for the trees.
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