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The Ransom
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TITLE (EDIT)
The Ransom |
DESCRIPTION
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[1,858 words] |
TITLE KEYWORD
Action |
AUTHOR
Jesse Olson |
ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
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[March 2001] |
AUTHOR'S E-MAIL ADDRESS
jesseolson@triton.net |
READER'S REVIEWS (2)
DISCLAIMER: STORYMANIA DOES NOT PROVIDE AND IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR REVIEWS. ALL REVIEWS ARE PROVIDED BY NON-ASSOCIATED VISITORS, REGARDLESS OF THE WAY THEY CALL THEMSELVES.
"Ok. The story started promising enough...I thought with such an interesting begining and a shady past with the main character (maybe an unlikely hero), and the angry beautiful woman, that we'd have a potential great story on our hands. But it leads nowhere. We don't know: 1. Who this guy was, why he raped the woman, what his motivation was, what he does for a living. Christ, we don't even know why he was on the plane! 2. Same for the woman. Why'd they kidnap her son? How did the kidnappers make the connection between she and John? 3. Who were the guys in the treehouse? Why'd they kidnap the boy, why were they fighting? There are so many questions I could go on for a couple hours...but instead I'll just say you have a promising start...but a long way to go. And don't label this story action cause you used a gun. You wanna read action...read In the Light of a Shadow, by myself, or Spooks by my two pals Jan and Smokey. But this...is crap for lack of a better word. Promising stories that turn out bad are worse than ones that start off bad...cause you end up dissapointed. And that's what I am. Dissapointed." -- Robert Hagans, Westminster, Md, The ol' U.S. of A..
"Your paper was written very well. It was suspenseful, and I couldn't wait to go on to each new paragraph. I also liked your introduction because it caught my attention right away. I immediately became involved in the story from the beginning when i was also wondering whothe stange woman was to the end when the John was in the tree and the baby was falling. Overall, this is very good!" -- Kristen, Normal, IL, USA.
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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2001 Jesse Olson |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
March 2001 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
577
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