ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
I am a 25 year old single mother with 2 daughters. I have lived in Alaska for 20 years, born in Florida. I have a very large family and we are very close [February 2007]
Will I See You In The Morning? Nicole Johnson
From the moment I met him, and we looked at each other…..I knew that there was something special and amazing about him that most people probably looked past. I felt I could almost see into his soul. I wanted to know everything about this stranger……
The entire next month I spent with him, was so perfect that I was afraid to blink.
We felt like we knew each other for a lifetime and didn’t want to take that for granted…..and so we chose to be only friends….He was my blessing from God.
I could look at him and know when something was on his mind. Just by a simple hug or kiss on the cheek, I felt all of his pain, his joy, his thoughts, his emotion…..
It didn’t take me long to figure out that I loved him. As we watched each other go through disappointment and failed relationships, I had to much pride to admit that I had made a mistake and felt in my heart that we belonged together. I was living on the hope of a improbable agreement that we would marry when I was thirty and him thirty-five, if we found ourselves alone at that time.
Then we slowly started to lose touch…
For months, I would close my eyes and see his face, I would dream about him. I’d look at old pictures and before I knew it, the tears would come. I longed to hear his voice and his laugh. I wanted to feel his arms around me in the same familiar hug I was used to…the embrace that always lasted longer than any other as he would whisper a simple “hi” in my ear and brush the hair out of my eyes
I hadn’t seen him in a while……Then one day there he was…. And as our eyes met, all of the pain I had endured in experiences where he was absent, seemed to disappear. I felt whole again and knew that it was because he held part of my heart…..But today was different. He now had a family of his own. As hard as it was, I could only accept it. And yet, as we found ourselves standing in a room alone, he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. For a moment I wanted time to stand still. My knees were weak and my heart ached. We stood there like that for a while, neither of us saying anything, but not really having too.
When it was time for him to leave, I again felt the same emptiness that I had grown used to. We hugged, and deep down, I knew that it was hard for both of us to let go. The minute the door closed behind him, my emotions were uncovered, and the tears fell….in front of everyone.
It was another four and a half months before I saw him again. I walked in, and there was his smile, and his blue eyes, welcoming me into my world of bliss…right in his arms.
We sat there, surrounded by friends, but feeling like it was only us. Our eyes would meet at the same time, and then he reach for my hand. If only there were words so beautiful to explain the way I felt in that moment. I was dying inside to tell him that I loved him and that I was incomplete and lost without him. That the vision of him in my mind over the years was what held me together.
I spent the next seven hours in his arms, watching him as he slept. I traced my fingers over every inch of his breathtaking face. And in the morning, I had to face the goodbyes, not knowing when I would see him again.
Two weeks later, I was back in his arms again…listening to his slow rhythmic breathing as we held each other for hours. As the sun came up, I knew that, once again, we had to go back to being friends.
I’m not sure what the future holds for us. But I know that when I am gray and old, I will still love him exactly the way I do today. I pray for his happiness, wherever God leads him. I know that we will meet again, for wild horses couldn’t keep me away.
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