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TITLE (EDIT)
My First Visit To Stonehenge |
DESCRIPTION
Join me, as I recount my first visit to Stonehenge, with railguns and C-4 thrown in for good effect.
[470 words] |
TITLE KEYWORD
Humor |
AUTHOR
Acquiesce |
ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
Together we stand, divider we fall, to quote from Pink Floyd. I'm a 15 year old living in New Zealand. If you read my funny stories, you may notice references to Blackadder, Marx Brothers, and Gary Larson. The funny stories are in a kind of Douglas Adams/Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy humor style.
Enjoy...
[January 2007] |
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (2)
Harold (Short Stories) Follow the funny life of Harold as he gets fired, gets dead and gets to live in India. [1,836 words] [Humor]
Product Of A Deranged Imagination (Short Stories) Smith, from Belfast, has Asperger's Syndrome. Read, as he describes his imaginary world. [385 words] [Mind]
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My First Visit To Stonehenge
Acquiesce
The first time I went to Stonehenge was five or six years ago and I don’t remember too much. However, the parts I do remember will recited for all those who read or listen to this fascinating tale.
It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly a shot rang out; a pirate ship appeared over the horizon. Actually, it was a cloudy day and there wasn’t a pirate ship about. Or was there? Nope, no pirate ships, but an awful lot of stones lying down or standing up. I went through the gates after paying my fee. Something caught my eye, and nearly pulled it out. Two shifty looking characters were standing there, standing there with a couple, a couple of shifty looking railguns, railguns that fire depleted uranium slugs at close to the speed, the speed of light. You do not want to be on the receiving end of one of those. Come to think of it, you do not really want to be on the receiving end of any type of gun. If you are being shot a with railguns, however, you will not even have time to put your head between you legs and kiss your ar$e goodbye. To further emphasize the point, the two fastest things in the world are, firstly bad gnus. When you get a bad gnu from a vending machine, it will nock your wallet and disappear before your very eyes. The second fastest things are railgun slugs.
Anyway, as I went through the gates and under the tunnel, they followed. I walked faster, but still they pursued. I broke into a run, but quickly fixed it so that it didn’t slow me down, then sprinted over the wire fence, and jumped up onto a stone. Still they persisted, and I grew wary. I suddenly realised why they were chasing me. Under my left foot was a clock that said 1:01.43 in large red digits. This could only mean one thing: this was a clock with large red digits! Then it hit me, this wasn’t a clock with large red digits, but a bomb with large red digits! An explosive bomb with large red digits! Then something else hit me, and flew like a brick. Luckily, a stone broke my fall. It subsequently toppled over and I broke its fall. I jumped up, and threw it away. But before I could do anything else, there was a huge flash of light, followed by a massive boom. The rock blew into a squillion pieces. You would do that too if you had twenty five kilos of C-4 in you.
The next thing I recall was a tunnel, with an intense light at the end of it. It turns out that somebody at the hospital had a cardboard tube, and was shining a torch down the other end.
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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2007 Acquiesce |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
January 2007 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
1664
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