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Eating Babies
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TITLE (EDIT)
Eating Babies |
DESCRIPTION
Forgive the title...it just seemed appropriate for this disturbing little tale...
[1,074 words] |
TITLE KEYWORD
Horror |
AUTHOR
Harvey Kennett |
ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
Wallace (We are Legion)
[November 2007] |
AUTHOR'S E-MAIL ADDRESS
hkintheuk@hotmail.com |
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (23)
Architects Of Our Own Demise (Short Stories) Man questions God for answers... and God replies... [369 words] [Horror]
Behind The Wheel (Short Stories) Tirenedness kills...take a break ! [556 words] [Horror]
Biding Its Time (Short Stories) Sometimes, you cannot rush Nature... [836 words] [Horror]
Birthday Boy (Short Stories) Younger children place a great importance to their Birthdays. An importance that adults should never underestimate... [967 words] [Horror]
Can You Trust Us Strangers ? (Short Stories) Your life is not your own... [304 words] [Science Fiction]
Divine Domain (Short Stories) The search for God takes many forms, not least of which is the Internet. A young man stumbles across God's Domain on the Web. This short story is the result of his "First Contact". [1,471 words] [Humor]
Elegant Provisions (Short Stories) Everyone is looking for the "perfect recipe"...here is a personal favourite...bon appetit ! [420 words] [Horror]
Eternal Diary (Poetry) Your clock is ticking... [123 words]
Goodnight Sweet Kevin (Short Stories) It concerns me that we, as a species, follow trends and "buzzwords", and anyone who dares to question the self-styled Hierophants of the Press and Govenment is crucified at the Altar of Supposed Freed... [603 words] [Science Fiction]
Lost In Space...Beagle 2 (Short Stories) The true story of Beagle 2 ? Apologies to Yanks in general... [1,105 words] [Science Fiction]
Man Skin (Short Stories) When you sleep, what happens to your dreams ? [776 words] [Horror]
Morning Comes (Poetry) Author’s Notes: This poem was written some 16 years ago, one morning when I woke from a beautiful dream. I imagined that my long-distance girlfriend who I only saw once a year was cuddled up in my ar... [65 words] [Romance]
Naming Of Farts (Poetry) Apologies to Henry Reed.... [243 words] [Humor]
Nobody Heard Me (Short Stories) If you found this when you returned home, how would you react ? [577 words] [Horror]
Some Body (Short Stories) Two lovers collide.... [220 words] [Humor]
The First Cut Was The Last (Short Stories) One man's irrational fear following a shocking discovery. [813 words] [Horror]
The Last Revelation (Short Stories) An alternative look at when we die... [883 words]
The Model (Poetry) ...incoming transmission... [167 words] [Science Fiction]
The Voyage (Poetry) We can all sail a calm sea, but life is about how we deal with the obstacles in our path. [130 words] [Self-Help]
This Golden Age (Poetry) I have met many folks who were unhappy with the time they were born in to. This poem is dedicated to them... [164 words] [Animal]
This Green And Sterile Land (Poetry) The UK coined the term "The Industrial Revolution". Once the wheel had turned full circle from unemeployment to employment and then back again, Britain eventually lost it's industrial edge and the fac... [154 words]
Words To Die For... (Short Stories) The story of one man's obsession with words.... [571 words] [Horror]
You Don't Have To Talk... (Short Stories) When you are shy, and cannot find the words to say, say nothing. [607 words] [Relationships]
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Eating Babies
Harvey Kennett
I don’t know how it happened, but it did.
Right there in the supermarket, next to the seasonal display of crackers, gift ideas and wrapping paper.
I slipped.
Sideways.
In to another dimension.
At first, I didn’t notice the massive paradigm shift in the stream of my consciousness. I suppose I wasn’t really looking for it, to be honest.
I reached out for a box of 12 crackers, each one made of white crepe paper, dressed as a snowman.
**********************************************
My hand went through the see-through plastic and I inadvertently grabbed the left most cracker. The eyes lit up and a small voice said “Oi ! Watch out! I’m trying to have a sleep here !”
I instinctively recoiled my hand back in horror, and looked around the aisle, hoping that no one had seen me, but also hoping that someone had, if only to offer me solace.
The wildebeest stood there, chewing on a baby from a bag of screaming infants tucked under one of his hooves, and eyed me suspiciously up and down. He then pounced upon me.
I blinked. Twice.
I asked him what the hell was going on.
He gave me a long, hard squint, popped another infant in to his mouth, and reached in to his police uniform with his unoccupied hoof and pulled out a strange metallic device. He held it up to his ear and mouth and spoke in to it.
“Security to Aisle 3. We have a situation. Send the Para Maniacs.”
He then looked at me with a particularly filthy stare and said, “It’s going to be alright, son. Take it easy.”
I was stunned. Speechless. Shocked. Paralysed with fear.
My torso fell to the floor, since my legs, which obviously had more sense than my brain, decided to “do a runner” away from the wildebeest and up the aisle towards the meat counter. They skidded around the corner, almost getting knocked over by a horde of velociraptors and tax officials queuing for dead flesh, when they saw their chance to made a concerted sprint for the cakes and biscuits in aisle 2.
Meanwhile, my torso lay ungainly on the floor next to the seasonal gifts. I recall seeing a sign that read “Furtive Meetings”, and feeling very queasy. Suddenly, everything began to diminish and the shelves grew taller. I realised that my torso was seeping through the gaps in the wicker floor.
At the biscuits and cakes aisle, my legs paused to catch their stride. Unbeknown to them, a 12 foot chocolate log python was just about to pounce on them when they too melted in to the floor, just as the python’s fangs sank in to the wicker matting.
As I fell, in an empty starfield, I saw my legs performing a sort of ballet manoeuvre in order to catch up with my torso. Eventually, we were reunited, just as we fell in to the orange like mess that looked like a sea of baked beans.
I struggled for air, spitting beans from my mouth as I floundered about in the orange tide of doom. But it was no use. I was sinking like a stone.
**********************************************
“Is he dead ?” said the old lady standing over me. She wore a brown fur coat, with a fake fur fox slung around her shoulders, snarling in defiance with its wide-open jaws.
“No, I don’t think so”, said the security guard.
His badge said “Will.D.Beast, Head of Security”.
He stood over my body, as the paramedics lifted me on to the stretcher.
“What happened?” asked the old lady to the security guard.
“The chap was reaching for something off the shelf, when those yobs I threw out earlier returned. They tracked me down to this aisle and one of them threw a tin of beans at me. Luckily, I saw him out of the corner of my eye and dodged out of the way, but our man here wasn’t so lucky. Hit him hard on the side on his head, it did.”
“Is he going to be alright?” the old lady asked the security guard.
“I hope so”, he said. “Luckily I’ve done first aid training and grabbed the nearest thing I could find. I tried to staunch the blood using this crèche paper”, and he gestured to the floor, covered with yellow crèche paper, drenched in blood.
“He’ll live”, he continued, adding, “It must have been a nasty shock. Little rascals had opened the tin of beans as well, using the tin openers in aisle 4. Made a complete mess of the floor. I even had to get some out of his mouth. He was choking on them.”
The security guard reached in to his pocket and offered a white bag containing jelly babies to the old lady. She refused and turned round to continue her shopping. He turned to the Paramedics and watched them wheel me down the aisle.
I passed the brightly lit shelves full of Christmas gifts. I remember passing underneath a sign. I think it said “Festive Greetings”, but I could be mistaken.
I saw a box of Christmas crackers, all dressed like little snowmen, wrapped in white paper. They seemed vaguely familiar.
**********************************************
I was in hospital for 2 weeks. The force of the thrown can was sufficient to cause the razor-sharp lid to slice deep in to my skull and lacerate part of my brain.
Were it not for the quick action of the security guard, I would probably be dead now.
I returned to the store after I had left hospital. Brain scans revealed no permanent damage and I was fit enough to walk and talk.
I found the security guard, funnily enough in the same aisle where I had been almost killed, 2 weeks previously. He was talking to a mother and her unruly 4-year-old son, who was pulling items off the shelves.
I bent down to help the security guard put the items back in their rightful places, and thanked him for saving my life. He was modest and said anyone would have done the same thing if they had been in his position. He accepted my thanks and walked off down the aisle.
As I put the last item back on to the shelf, I looked in surprise as I noticed it was a box of Christmas crackers, resembling snowmen, all wrapped in white paper. The memory of the incident came flooding back to me. They were the last thing I saw before I fell semi-conscious to the floor. I smiled as I slid the box back on to the shelf.
The one on the far left winked at me.
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READER'S REVIEWS (2)
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"I found this really refreshing and very easy to follow, surprisingly! Certainly not a storyline I've encountered before. Not sure about the cutesy last sentence mind..." -- Rowan Davies.
"what a wired dream he had or did will beast eat babies." -- Jeanette .
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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2003 Harvey Kennett |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
December 2003 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
2605
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