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TITLE (EDIT)
The Santa Claus Conspiracy
DESCRIPTION
When two young boys who don't believe in Santa Claus try to catch the mall imposter in his act confusion insues. Is Santa Claus real? Or were they right to not believe in him?
[890 words]
TITLE KEYWORD
Comedy
AUTHOR
Sarah Buck F Buck
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
-
[October 2006]
AUTHOR'S E-MAIL ADDRESS
[email protected]
The Santa Claus Conspiracy
Sarah Buck F Buck

FADE IN
Κ
INT. MALL
Κ
We are inside a modern, American mall. The rows of shops and kiosks are endless.
ΚΚ
JACK and HUGH are each walking with their mothers. They are both eight years old.
Κ
Jack is a little taller than Hugh and he has the serious face of an adult.
Κ
Hugh is downright adorable. HeΥs the sort of boy that you could never be mad at, not even if he wiped his chocolate stained fingers all over your new couch.
Κ
NARRATOR (O/S)
ThereΥs a certain natural, biological
order of events in a childΥs life; a
typical way in which situations are
meant to unfold. If this chain is broken
or rearranged the effects on the child
can be EXTREME.
Κ
CLOSE ON:
Κ
Jack blinks.
Κ
NARRATOR (O/S)
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ ΚA particularly big realization for a
child is when he or she realizes the
difference between real and make believe.
If this discovery comes too late, or
worse still, to early, the results can
be INTENSE.
Κ


CUT TO:
Κ
INT. SANTA CLAUSE SETUP
Κ
We see a typical mall Santa Claus. HeΥs snapping pictures with both frightened and excited children. Teen-aged helper elves try to bring structure to the event.
Κ
LINE
Κ
Jack and Hugh and their mothers go to the back of the line. The mothers start talking to each other. Hugh turns to Jack.Κ
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
(childish squeaky voice)
Okay, whatΥs the plan?
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ
JACK
ItΥs not much of a plan. You just go up
there and pull.
Κ
JACK motions a downward ΤpullΥ with his hands.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
You mean, you pull?ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
No, youΥre doing it.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
No way. What if I get in trouble?
Κ
JACK
Look, do you want to know if heΥs real,
or not?
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
Well yeah, but-
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
Then go up there and pull.
Κ
Jack motions a downward ΤpullΥ with his hands again.
Κ
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
(to himself)
I just donΥt see why I gotta be the one
to do it.
Κ
SANTA CLAUS AND GIRL
Κ
A fancy dressed little girl is excitedly reading off a list to the mall Santa Claus. She looks obnoxious.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
Idiot.Κ
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ
You canΥt blame her Jack. We thought he
was real tooΙonce.
Κ
Jack tilts his head away from the girl in disgust. He has the mannerisms of a forty-year-old.
Κ
One of the female teen-aged helper elves comes up to Jack and Hugh.Κ
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ GIRL
Are you two ready to meet Santa Claus?
Κ
Jack looks away again. Hugh smiles but doesnΥt say anything.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ GIRL
I bet thereΥs a lot of things you want
to ask Santa for.
Κ
Jack keeps looking away. Hugh keeps smiling.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ GIRL
Come on you guys. What are you going
to ask for?
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
I want some more trains for my set.
Κ
Jack looks at Hugh as though he just went insane.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
ItΥs true, I really do want that.

ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
(to girl)
WeΥll just tell Santa when we get
there, okay?

ΚThe girl gives an awkward sort of laugh and walks off.
Κ
At this point Hugh and Jack have reached the front of the line.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
IΥm scared.

JACK
DonΥt be.

HUGH
I canΥt breath.

JACK
Then breath later. Just do it.
Κ
Jack pushes Hugh forward. Hugh sits on Santa ClausΥs lap.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
Do it.
Κ
Hugh sits silent for a second. He then reaches up and tries to pull SantaΥs beard...
...But it doesnΥt pull. Both boys are shocked.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
YouΥre real.
Κ
Santa Claus is all jolly.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ SANTA CLAUS
Of course I am. Ho ho ho.
Κ
Hugh makes the cutest laugh of all time.Κ
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ HUGH
In that case, I really do want some more
trains. I havenΥt been the best boy, but
you can ask my mom, IΥve been pretty
good. IΙ

Hugh continues to excitedly talk to Santa. Jack looks bewildered. How was he wrong? How is Santa Claus real?
Κ
Hugh finishes and Jack goes to sit on Santa ClausΥs lap.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
I have to say, I doubted you. I mean I
really thought this was a scam.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ SANTA CLAUS
A scam. Ho ho ho, what silliness. Of
course IΥm real.
ΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚΚ JACK
I have to apologize, but I promise
never to distrust you again.

SANTA CLAUS
Ho, ho, ho.

FLASH

A flash goes off as a picture of Jack and Santa Clause is taken.

Jack goes back to his mother, shaking his head, a little ashamed of how wrong he was. Hugh is ecstatic, heΥs glad Santa Claus is real.

JACK
You know, I think we learned a valuable
lesson here, Hugh.

HUGH
We were wrong.

JACK
HeΥs a good guy, I really am sorry I
ever-

CLOSE ON:

Santa Claus has some cotton coming out from under his shirt.

CLOSE ON:
A devilish spark comes over JackΥs eyes.

JACK
I was right! I was right!

HUGH
(confused)
What?

JACK
HeΥs an impostor! Resume plan!

HUGH
What?

JACK
Pull! Pull!

HUGH
I already did.

JACK
No! Not his beard, his belly.

HUGH
I donΥt understand.

JACK
He canΥt be Santa Claus. HeΥs not even fat.
HeΥs stuffed!

With these words Jack turns around and pounces on this mall Santa Claus. Hugh follows his best friend and pounces on top of them both.

Jack pulls a piece of cotton from under the fake Santa ClausΥs costume.

JACK
Kids of the world!, you have been deceived!

The camera zooms away from the scene as the pandemonium continues and back into the dizzy, maze of never-ending shops and kiosks.

FADE OUT

 

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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2006 Sarah Buck F Buck
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
October 2006
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
1457
 

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