ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
I have been writing since I was nine years old...this is the first time anyone has read my work....all feedback is appreciated. [April 2006]
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (21) A Woman (Poetry) About a woman, (this woman) and how love affects her.... [259 words] [Romance] Damn! I Fell.... (Poetry) I fell....in Love. [322 words] First Meeting (Short Stories) Erotic tale of a man and woman who met online, and are meeting face to face for the first time. [2,501 words] [Erotic] For Now.... (Poetry) For now...things are as they should be.... [175 words] I Sit And I Write (Poetry) A reason as to why its hard for me to share. [143 words] I'm Truly Tired.... (Poetry) I'm truly truly tired...and I want to give in....but cant... [150 words] Just Thoughts..... (Poetry) Just thoughts running through my mind.....at a crazy point in my life..... [191 words] [Romance] La Otra Mujer (Poetry) The Other Woman [206 words] Lost....Again.... (Poetry) Ever found yourself lost...time and time again? [137 words] [Mind] Love....My Love (Poetry) My idea of love. [126 words] [Relationships] My Child, My Son, My Little Boy (Poetry) Funny thing is... I don't even have a son... lol... but I feel the pain none-the-less. [516 words] New School Kinda Love (Poetry) Just my thoughts and views on Love in today's world. [287 words] Old School Kinda Love (Poetry) This is the kinda love i'm looking for...it's a spoken word piece...so u might not be able to catch the flow...but here it is nonetheless... [370 words] [Romance] One Step Closer (Poetry) - [751 words] The Complexity Of Simplicity (Poetry) How hard can the simple things be? [147 words] Time...Is All I Have (Poetry) What can heal a broken heart? only time.... [169 words] [Relationships] Until Then...... (Poetry) - [102 words] [Relationships] What Could Never Be (Poetry) What should not have happened, did, if only for a brief moment..... [144 words] [Relationships] What I Want (Poetry) Everyone wants alot of things in life....these are a few of the things that I want. [189 words] Why? The Question Of My Life..... (Poetry) Just asking a question and hopefully finding the answer within. [311 words] [Mind] You'll Never Know That (Poetry) Some things are just not ment for others to know. [118 words] [Relationships]
Not Ready... Charity B Baez
Those who know me�
Know�
They know my eyes change color with my mood�.
They know I�m just as comfortable in sweats, sneakers, and a fitted�
As I am in a low cut blouse, high heeled shoes and make-up�
Those who know me�.
Know�.
That I grew up in a dysfunctional home�
With an alcoholic mother�
And an absentee father�
Those who know me�
Know�
That I�ve been through hell and back in relationships�
Cheated on�
Beated on�
Used and abused by boys�
And girls alike�
But they know that I�m a strong, independent woman�
And I have survived�
And will continue to grow�
Stronger�
Those who know me�
Know�
What they want to know�
What they want to see�
What they want to hear�
Because God forbid they know the loneliness in my heart�
See the pain in my eyes�
Or hear the hurt in my voice�
God forbid they notice how close I am to the breaking point�
How at any given second that silky string holding me together will SNAP!
Those who know me�
Know�
That I keep all my emotions in check�
Plaster on a smile and let the bitter and thoughtless words that I have for the world dissolve on my tongue�
But they don�t taste them like I do�
They can�t feel them
Sliding slowly down my stomach
They don�t notice that I�m getting full�
That every once in a while,
I�ll regurgitate, taste it again, and swallow it back down�
They don�t know�
Want to know�
Feel the need to know
The urgency in which I need to find a way to expel all this chaos reeking havoc on my internal organs�
To dispel of this pain,
Confusion,
Disillusionment�
What I would give for one single solitary moment;
All to myself;
Of pure happiness�
Joy�
Contentment�
Instead�
I suffer in a solitary silence�
While surrounded by friends�
Family�
Lovers�
Who all desperately want to believe�
That they know the real me�
But who are not capable of handling the burden of knowing me�
Not Ready�
Not ready to witness the anger�
Frustration�
And insecurities of me,
Come to a boil�
Not Ready�
Not ready to counsel me�
Guide me�
Teach me how to function normally within the human race
Not Ready�
Instead�
They take comfort,
In foolishly believing that I am an indestructible rock�
Stable,
Steady,
Secure�
Not Ready�
And I take comfort in their blindness�
And my misery�
They do not see a problem,
And I do not see a solution�
They do not see me in pain,
And I cannot seem to shake it�
They do not see my inability to love without the total destruction of my heart being the end result�
Not Ready�
They do not see�
The torment�
Confusion�
Sadness�
In my soul�
Because they refuse to see�
That this is all their fault�
For not trying�
Climbing�
Fighting�
To know the real me�
They are�
Not Ready�
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