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State Of The Subway Cars Report (R44s-R188s) by Winson Thai A really long report that I wrote in high school about all the sub... [4,241 words]
Sheepshead Bay Station by Winson Thai This is an essay I wrote in college about how the subway station I lived by, Sheepshead ... [712 words]
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Connecting With A Train Engineer: My Personal Memories Of Amtrak's Coast Starlight by Shelley J Alongi Four trips on the Coast Star... [3,862 words]
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Unrealistic Reality by Michelle Mercier - [319 words]
So Much Time by Michelle Mercier - [740 words]
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Metrolink 111: It's All About Lunch by Shelley J Alongi Never turn down an invitation to lunch and always make good memories. Good ... [909 words]
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Unbridled Fury: The Battle To Breathe
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TITLE (EDIT)
Unbridled Fury: The Battle To Breathe
DESCRIPTION
Subconscious thought...
[685 words]
AUTHOR
R Bennett Okerstrom
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
A collection of my work from circa 1995 to the present. Some dark and deep, others bright and cheerful.
[December 2014]
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (63)
Asylum Of My Soul (Poetry) Nowhere to go. [36 words]
Blanket Of Trust (Poetry) Take my secret to your grave [59 words]
Blood Game (Songs) A lyrical taste of the hunt created solely for a friend's upcoming novel. [139 words] [Horror]
Broken Halo (Songs) An angel falls from her sky [182 words]
Bryna (Poetry) Saying goodbye to my mom [131 words]
Columbian Necktie (Songs) When you've said one too many things to piss someone off...someone writes a heavy metal song about you. [99 words] [Horror]
Dark Wave (Poetry) Exorcising demons of the past [113 words]
Deliverance (Poetry) Lingering thoughts and images of something I cannot recall. [97 words]
Denial (Poetry) Forbidden love [191 words]
Downtown: Coney Island Footlong (Poetry) Part four of a series referring to Downtown Detroit's homeless population. [635 words]
Downtown: Do You Have A Quarter? (Poetry) Part one of a series referring to Downtown Detroit's homeless population. [315 words]
Downtown: Mr. O.D.C. Preacher (Poetry) Part three of a series referring to Downtown Detroit's homeless population. [261 words]
Downtown: One Eye (Poetry) Part two of a series referring to Downtown Detroit's homeless population. [223 words]
Dreamscape: The Thirst (Poetry) It even happens in your dreams. [77 words]
Echoes In My Head (Poetry) Laying in bed on December 24th. [61 words] [Drama]
Eternal Desire (Poetry) A vampire will stop at nothing to claim his bride and grant her immortality. [84 words]
Ever And Ever (Songs) Just another heavy guitar and deep baseline type of song on the subject of immortality. [127 words]
Faceless (Songs) The rise to the top can end abruptly. [116 words]
Feels Like Forever (Poetry) Sometimes you miss someone, if even for a day, and it feels like forever. [66 words] [Romance]
Here Alone (Songs) Sometimes you never see it coming [104 words]
I Keep On Falling For You (Songs) Just found it and others in a folder tagged "1993 Work" [142 words]
I Need (Poetry) This is a song about never really knowing what you had until it's gone. [124 words]
I Own You (Poetry) Never forget that I own you. [88 words]
Imperfection (Poetry) - [62 words]
In Your Dreams (Poetry) - [71 words]
Infidelity (Poetry) When a husband ignores his wife, a marriage will crumble and the wife will stray... [98 words]
Influence (Poetry) How influential can a demon of the night be? [218 words]
Losing Battle (Poetry) Prepare for sin. [109 words]
Lost Without You (Songs) More from the "1993 Work" folder. [179 words]
Mended Heart (Poetry) - [90 words]
Never Regret What Makes You Smile (Poetry) When two people want to be together and they aren't. [94 words] [Relationships]
New Beginning (Poetry) - [93 words]
Nobody Likes You (Songs) How does it feel to be the person that has everything but friends? [170 words]
Nothing (Poetry) - [77 words]
Progressive Silence (Poetry) Sometimes there is no sound. Starting over never works. [79 words]
R.A.O. (Poetry) Saying goodbye to my Dad [79 words]
Remember (To Remind Me) (Songs) Punkish song. [103 words]
Saddam Hussein (Poetry) I was bored. Therefore I write. [39 words]
Sanguinary (Poetry) The blood continues to flow in this experimental preface followed by poetry. [128 words] [Horror]
Seed (Poetry) Are eight lines enough? [44 words]
Shattered Dream (Poetry) The result of betrayal by one's best friend and one's girlfriend. [141 words]
Shut Your Mouth (Songs) Sometimes you just need to shut your mouth! [92 words]
Six (Poetry) What would you do with only six days? [68 words]
Someone Like You (Poetry) - [74 words]
Sounds Of A Summer Countryside (Poetry) - [113 words]
Standing On The Edge Of Depression (Poetry) Self-worth, self-pity and self-confidence. [137 words]
Storymania (Poetry) What is Storymania? [97 words]
Temporary Dreams (Poetry) - [36 words]
The Din (Poetry) 42 strong words. [42 words]
The Embrace (Poetry) A newly born vampire's first taste. [90 words]
The Voice (Poetry) Evil whispers across the wind. [127 words]
Theend (Songs) It's the end of this relationship. [106 words]
To Be Alone (Songs) I'd rather be alone than trapped. [106 words]
Unbridled Fury: The Subconscious (Essays) Subconscious thought... [365 words]
Undaunting (Poetry) Bring me home [66 words] [Motivational]
Unflowing (Poetry) - [62 words]
Untitled -- 1989 (Poetry) As taken from "Disintegration". [96 words]
Us (Poetry) - [182 words]
Wake Of Destruction (Songs) You can run, but you cannot outrun fate. [112 words]
We Are Right (Poetry) You should always fight for whatís right in life and in love. [113 words] [Romance]
Witch Hunt (Poetry) Defeating the evil that takes away life is more difficult than it seems. [165 words] [Horror]
(I See) The Light (Poetry) Can you see the light? [98 words]
(It's Time To) Cut The Cord (Songs) There comes a time when you just need to cut the cord [131 words]
Unbridled Fury: The Battle To Breathe
R Bennett Okerstrom

    ††††The unbridled fury within the realm of oneself will supercede the ability to rationalize any situation brought by deceit and deception. At the point of exhaustion, one will become so aware of his surroundings that he will actually become one with his surroundings and, therefore, escape the daggers thrust upon him by the disciples of death. The fury will quickly spread throughout the soul, showering the body with evil thoughts of decadence until the rage can no longer be contained. Those who have committed cajolery will be dealt with accordingly. Those who have seemingly loved will be spared. Enemies will be held impotent, unable to defend against the onslaught brought about by the pent up rage and fury of the beholder. The siege of trauma will engulf all those who have betrayed in the past, leaving nothing but decay in its path. The cocoon of horror has begun to unravel at the point of its very existence -- the human soul.

I hold my breath as I wish for death. Death from this unforgiving, cruel world that has had a vise-like hold on me since my unwanted emergence into it. There is nothing more that I can do to save my soul from the constant shrieking that echoes in my head. The calls of savagery that have beckoned me to commit the very crimes that have placed me in this godforsaken asylum for the remainder of my pathetic existence. The voices that drive me into the berserker rage that comes seconds before I make my kill. I must free myself from this torture. Within the downward spiral of my very thoughts lies an answer to the enigma bestowed upon me. The answer to my prayers. The reason to go on living. To follow the course drawn out before me that will lead me to eternal bliss amongst those who have had no wrongdoings. There is still a glimmer of hope for me and those like me. I must escape from the asylum that dares to keep me hostage, that dares to infringe upon my ability to roam freely across the dreamscape. The asylum of my soul must be abolished, for it hinders any opportunity that remains in my favor. Time is of the essence. The obsessive patterns of darkness shall be overshadowed by good. The good that is necessary to eradicate the premonition of death. No longer will the threshold be out of reach. It is time for the reemergence of my soul and for the requiem of the departed evils that have marked my existence from the womb. I shall govern my own body with my own thoughts and actions from my own mind. The mind that has plotted the deaths of so many shall now be used to save and preserve the human race. For the time has come for voices to subside and resonate elsewhere. I am in control. I am breathing once more.

As I return from my inner grave, I ponder the notion of raison d'etre. Is there actually a justification for existence? From the depths of meditation arises the reverberation of self worth. The self-reproach spawned from the violent acts committed outweighs the means for saving the soul. The reprobated individual is condemned to the realm before him, the asylum of one's soul. It is far too late to question the morality of it all, for death is imminent. Corrosion has set in and the already uncontrollable urge to degenerate has begun. There is no coming back from the darkside once the plane is crossed. The voice begins to echo once again. The psychosis cannot be stopped. I am no longer in command of my thoughts, my actions, my life. I am not breathing.

The fury, the rage, the uncontained horror that lies within my soul. It cannot be reckoned with. There must be a way out. A path that leads to a world of freedom unlike this wretched world that exists in my psyche. The twisted remains of thought must be unraveled in order to locate the strength needed to win this battle. The battle to breathe once more.
††††
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"This seems to speak to the inconsolable pain of mental illness and depict quite vividly the struggle to maintain true self. It is strong and visceral in voice. It moves." -- YMarlow.
"Thank you. I wrote this a very long time ago. I believe it was 1995. " -- R. Bennett.

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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 1995 R Bennett Okerstrom
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
December 2007
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
2175
 

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