You Don't Know What You're Doing (Or Why You're Still Fat) by Robert Levin People with perpetual obesity issues are playing a g... [804 words]
Visual Mind by Wanderer Bass This is what I see and think during times of when I'm in a "feral" mode. [663 words]
The Surge by Dylan Barbour About the surge [448 words]
Talking In Circles by Jordan Holetzky Its not really an essay don't know what to put it as.... doesn't make sense just suppose to ... [86 words]
Nothing Can Get Worse by Jordan Holetzky Beleive [179 words]
God, Man, Consciousness, Magic, Science And Alien Inteligence by Michael Potter An essay on the history of the universe and the o... [9,701 words]
Especially For You, Beautiful One by Hannibal Kildare Expressing my true emotions for someone really unique and special. [140 words]
Basics Of A Personality Disorder by Robert A Ferguson A relatively short essay summarizing the causes, affects, and treatment of Mul... [1,554 words]
Balanced by Sasu - [65 words]
Waiting For Sunshine.... by Anslem B Gentle The Power of a Woman's Smile [1,013 words]
Two Way Street by Flying Solo-Now I've written this small piece just because I am bored right now. [80 words]
Questions And Answers About Islam by Wael El-Manzalawy - [192 words]
Paranormal Sighting 1 More Lights. by Wanderer Bass The follow up of what I saw. Note: The first paranormal sighting one was sup... [372 words]
Paranormal Sighting 1 Lights And Eyes by Bass The beginning of a series of paranormal sightings I have seen and sometim... [340 words]
Old Phil Propagated A Good Old Hoax by James Snyder It began as all things begin n a long period of boredom with nothing exciti... [882 words]
Islam by Wael El-Manzalawy - [483 words]
Harrassment by Wanderer Bass This has been going on ever since my school started to learn about The Holocaust. [857 words]
A Love Letter: To Whom It May Concern by Ghost Writer Just speaking what's in my mind. [400 words]
What Kind Of Person Are You? by Jordan Holetzky It's not really an essay I just don't know what to categorize this as.... [376 words]
Through Thick And Thin-True Friends by Kaitlin Kingdon - [1,079 words]
Symbolism Over Substance – The Liberal Manifesto by Richard Koss A non-fiction essay about liberal ideology and its influence o... [1,229 words]
Skinny Girls, Fat Girls, And Girls That Are In Between by Jordan Holetzky I wrote this out of boredom...so no offense to anyone! [374 words]
Serene Sky by J D Existenialist writing, sound profound?? [169 words]
Read This by Jordan Holetzky This really isn't an essay I didn't know what to categorize it as...sorry... [93 words]
Poll by Jordan Holetzky Written when I was really bored...and once again I didn't know what to categorize it as...sorry... [54 words]
Please Don't Do It by Jordan Holetzky My friend and I were talking and she was saying she was getting so stressed and depressed sh... [349 words]
Can You Picture by Jordan Holetzky A little thing I wrote to make people think. [320 words]
What I Am Thankful For by Jordan Holetzky All the things that I am thankful for in my life... [108 words]
Under The Sun by Randall Barfield What happens in real life is that we humans are vicious one to the other... [839 words]
To My Mom by Jordan Holetzky Something I wrote to my mom about how much she means to me... [284 words]
The No-No's And Yes-Yes's. by Wanderer Bass Do not EVER joke around about The Holocaust. [245 words]
Importance Of The First Amendment by Jordan Holetzky It tells what rights the First Amendments protects...I mean everyone should k... [327 words]
Don't Be Obsessive by Wanderer Bass People during school who act like they are a "gangsta." [456 words]
Policing-Immigration Lines by Randall Barfield This is a bit about patriotism but not fanaticism. [1,193 words]
What Is Smart by Stormy The Writer Smart Essay. [421 words]
The Differences Of Love by Jordan Holetzky A little thing between our love and God's love. [550 words]
The Christ In The Holy Quran by Wael El-Manzalawy - [1,584 words]
Pick Up Lines by Jordan Holetzky Oh, this is just kinda a guy bashing thing... [524 words]
Do The Deed, Legalize Weed by Dylan Barbour - [656 words]
911 And Iraq by O'donnell - [243 words]
When I Was Just A Little Boy. by Sean P Jessop - [393 words]
Vote by H J I think we could make goverment work bettter for everyone. [425 words]
A Kind Of Dissertation - A Pessimistic (Perhaps Realistic) View On Aliens From Another Planet by Wallace Doig The author sets f... [542 words]
Hiking To Higher Heights by Chris K Sexton A cause and effect essay about learning to truly read with quality and comprehension. [660 words]
Getting A Leg Up On Evolution by Jeffrey Hansson The theory of evolution continues to be a controversial subject. Yet, to those wi... [1,965 words]
When I Tried To Run Away From My Fears... by Innovant Deis Can't I ever run away from this world and my fears? [698 words]
The Dog And The Mynah by Innovant Deis The famed story of a dog and a mynah... a story of trickery and tit for tat. [494 words]
Streetlight by Michael Schmitt - [293 words]
Malice In “I Wonder Who I Am” Land by James Snyder For many years I maintained confidence in my personal identity. I knew exact... [885 words]
Living Your Life To The Fullest by Taylor R Ware This essay proves my love for dance. [317 words]
Imagination And Children by Lawson - [600 words]
Dead-To-The-World Man Walking
A Silent Night — Not At My House by James Snyder People say, as they get older their hearing is not what it used to be. I have ... [895 words]
A Page From Betty Crocker’S Cookbook by James Snyder Recently, while sitting in my chair drinking the last of my breakfast coff... [860 words]
Essay On Rats by Johanna Johannamcd Essay On Rats Written by Johanna & Philip McDaniel Being great pets, rats were introduced t... [1,026 words]
The Culture Of Fear: Fear Based On Fallacies by Tina Jafarkhani Sociology research paper based on "The Culture of Fear," written b... [321 words]
Socialism – The Cornerstone Of America by Louise Friedman “In the struggle for socialism, what should be done to attain and sustai... [1,098 words]
I Stare Out Of The Window by Vera Marbrylouch A look at life while wondering what happened. [345 words]
Baby Talk by Glendora Rider Commentary on today's vocabulary usage. An essay by a humorist. [296 words]
Islam Versus Atheism by Wael El-Manzalawy - [374 words]
The God In Islam by Wael El-Manzalawy - [337 words]
Pet Peeve by Mike Rox This essay is on how annoying it is when people sing along to music. [674 words]
Thoughts On The Death Of Peter Jennings: Dividing The Sky by Shelley J Alongi An essay on why I feel Peter Jenning's death so keenl... [1,203 words]
Islam Helps You by Wael El-Manzalawy - [241 words]
Homechick by Saurabh Gupta An article. [823 words]
Free Jazz: The Jazz Revolution Of The '60s by Robert Levin "Man, In another ten years we won't even need traffic lights we're g... [2,615 words]
Go to page: 1 2 3 4 5 [6] 7 8 9 10 11
| |
TITLE (EDIT)
Dead-To-The-World Man Walking |
DESCRIPTION
One morning this week, I woke up with a black eye. How I got it still baffles me. I have my suspicions, of course, but some things are better left to themselves no matter how lonely they may get.
[891 words] |
TITLE KEYWORD
Humor |
AUTHOR
James Snyder |
ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
James L. Snyder is an award winning author and popular columnist living with his wife, Martha, in Ocala, Florida and can be contacted at jamessnyder2@att.net.
[October 2009] |
AUTHOR'S E-MAIL ADDRESS
jamessnyder2@att.net |
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (15)
A Cup Of Joe Says A Lot About Us (Short Stories) This week I came face-to-face with a genuine dilemma. I had several meetings across town and for some reason I miscalculated and ended up with a 2-1/2 hour gap between meetings. I hate to waste time, ... [902 words]
A Page From Betty Crocker’S Cookbook (Essays) Recently, while sitting in my chair drinking the last of my breakfast coffee, a thought staggered into my mind. I must confess most thoughts are quite lonely once they enter my mind, but this one had ... [860 words] [Humor]
A Silent Night — Not At My House (Essays) People say, as they get older their hearing is not what it used to be. I have found this to be true for myself. The older I get, and I plan to get as old as I can, the more I hear noises in the middle... [895 words] [Humor]
Be Happy, Join The Wednesday Worry Club (Essays) Of all the people who know me, no one would say I am afflicted with worryitis. They may say other things about me, which may or may not be true, but that's another story. [918 words] [Humor]
How To Cash In On Your ‘Ailment Capital' (Essays) Right after the president won his re-election bid for the White House, he made an interesting comment. He said he was going to spend his "political capital" wisely. At first, I did not understand wha... [926 words] [Humor]
If All Things Are Possible,” Why Can't I Balance My Checkbook? (Short Stories) For me, the most terrible time of each month is the day our bank statement comes. We commonly call it BSS (Bank Statement Syndrome). I don't know why it is, but I have trouble getting the parsonage ch... [904 words] [Humor]
In My House, If It's Broken I Bought It (Essays) Often a store has a sign with the warning, "You break it, you bought it." This is to keep people from carelessly handling the merchandise. I'm thinking of another sign, which should be posted all thr... [907 words] [Humor]
Malice In “I Wonder Who I Am” Land (Essays) For many years I maintained confidence in my personal identity. I knew exactly who I was and was quite comfortable in my skin. Although, I must confess my skin used to fit me better than it does these... [885 words]
Now That I'm Older, I'm Still Not Wiser (Essays) Now that summer is over and the children are back in school I found myself indulging in a little bit of retrospective thinking. It took some doing but I was able to think all the back to when I was a ... [883 words] [Humor]
Nurses, Bedpans And X-Rated Hospital Gowns (Essays) Tuesday last I awoke from my nightly slumber with terrific pain in my chest, much like an elephant break-dancing on my chest. It was painful just to breathe, but like the trooper I am, I shrugged it o... [923 words] [Humor]
Old Phil Propagated A Good Old Hoax (Essays) It began as all things begin n a long period of boredom with nothing exciting to do. Whoever said, “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop,” knew something of what they were speaking. [882 words]
The One Great Sermon That Got Away (Essays) Most people don't realize ministers are obligated to prepare and preach one great sermon in their career. In looking over my record of sermons, I noticed many "good" sermons, but an obvious lack in th... [886 words] [Humor]
Who Has The Greatest Job In The World? (Essays) I have, in my opinion, the world's perfect job. Just look at the evidence. I love people and I love God. I love talking to people about God and I love talking to God about people. Therefore, if you p... [963 words] [Humor]
‘And How Do We Feel This Morning?' (Essays) Without question, going to the hospital is teamwork from the time you arrive until you are wheeled out the front door. Everyone is working together for the common good of the patient, or at least a cr... [909 words] [Humor]
‘I'm Not A Christian, But I Play One On Sunday' (Essays) After more than three decades of church ministry, I have come to one unsettling conclusion. Actually, I've come to more than one conclusion, but this one is the most depressing. That conclusion is si... [890 words] [Humor]
|
Dead-To-The-World Man Walking
James Snyder
One morning this week, I woke up with a black eye. How I got it still baffles me. I have my suspicions, of course, but some things are better left to themselves no matter how lonely they may get.
In getting older, I have realized certain things are changing in my body. For example, I now find myself walking in my sleep. This is a new experience for me and I'm not sure what it means or what I should do about it.
On the positive side, walking in my sleep is about the only exercise I really get these days, so I should not complain too much. It is nice to know at my age some things are still working even if it is when I am unconscious. My problem has escalated to the point where I have begun wearing sneakers to bed. Of course, I don’t wear anything else and when I find myself three blocks down the street, my sneakers had better be PDF (pretty dashing fast).
Walking in my sleep is not that bad, except for my mysterious black eye.
Not only am I walking in my sleep, but also my wife has accused me of talking in my sleep. Actually, in my own defense, talking in my sleep is the only time I get a word in edgewise. I guess in the middle of the night I'm trying to make up for this lack during the day.
Lately, I have talked so much in my sleep I wake up a little horse, which just may explain why I have been eating like one lately.
Unfortunately, my talking during the night has kept my wife awake so much; she recently requested I start preaching in my sleep so she can get to sleep.
I used to have trouble falling asleep at night. I tried counting sheep but their bleating kept me awake. When I lay there wide-awake, I began worrying about those sheep. Did someone feed them? And, am I going to have to shear all those sheep myself?
Each night I try to get in 40 winks but by the time I reach number 33 I lose count and have to start all over again. The older I get the more my sleep resembles a salad – well tossed.
Actually, noises in the night upset me the most. Sleep has a way of bringing out the noise in our house, from a dripping faucet down the hall to a creaking window shutter in the living room. It's amazing how intelligent these noises in the night can be. They are quiet until I'm just about ready to drift off into la-la-land.
For example, as far as we know we have no mice in our house. We have never seen any evidence of such critters in our blessed domicile. Yet, in the middle of the night I hear these little critters gnawing the wall right by my head. How they know where I sleep and when I go to sleep is one of the mysteries of these diminutive night stalkers.
Through the years, I have tried many things to help me get to sleep at night. For some reason I have no trouble going to sleep during the daytime particularly in the afternoon. I call these “power naps,” the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage has another name for them, which I cannot repeat here for obvious reasons, my health being the primary one.
I’ve tried everything to help me fall asleep at night. Once I placed my shoes and socks right next to my bed before I go to sleep. Although it had its intended effect upon me, it also had an adverse effect upon the other occupant of my bed.
No matter when I go to bed nor how long I have slept, I always need just one minute more of sleep. Why is it I can hear the drip of a faucet down the hall but I can't hear the clanging alarm clock at my head? Eventually, when I do full asleep the crack of dawn awakens me.
My wife, trying to assist me in my nocturnal dilemma, suggested I try some hot cocoa right before going to sleep. For the most part, it does work. My only difficulty with hot cocoa is if I don't drink it quickly enough I begin nodding halfway through and spill it on my chest. I can assure you it's a real eye opener.
I am reminded of a verse of scripture that addresses this subject. David, the Psalmist observes, "It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep" (Psalms 127:2 KJV).
And then, who could overlook Psalms 121:3-4 (KJV), "He [God] will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep."
Now, back to my black eye. I really have no recollection of how this happened. My wife has tried explaining it to me by pointing out, most correctly, that lately I have been walking in my sleep. No argument from me. Then she explained while I was walking in my sleep the other night I walked into the bathroom door causing the black eye.
I'm not in any position to question her, but I noticed she was rubbing her right fist most tenderly.
|
|
Submit Your Review for Dead-To-The-World Man Walking
Required fields are marked with (*).
Your e-mail address will not be displayed.
|
|
Submit Your Rating for Dead-To-The-World Man Walking
|
COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2006 James Snyder |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
April 2006 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
1919
|
|
