Biggest Regrets
Colette Schiller


Screams echoed through the air. I tried to get away but I couldn't I wasn't strong enough. The screams got louder and louder and they wore me out. I couldn't run any longer. I fell to the ground out of air. I screamed for help but no one came. Where I was no one could go. They were closer now. Soon they would be part of me. I stopped struggling there was nothing I could do.
I sat up gasping for air.
“It was just a dream,” I breathed to myself.
I wiped the sweat from my clammy forehead and went to the bathroom. I flicked on the switch and stared at myself in the mirror. Then, shakily, I reached out and turned on the tap to get some water. I held my long muddy brown hair back from my face then splashed it with some water.
“Elizabeth what in the world are you doing up this late. Its one o’clock in the morning,” a raspy voice called
I jumped stumbling backwards. I turned to face the voice but it was only my mom. I sighed a sigh of relief and closed my eyes for a minute.
“Sorry, bad dream, I wanted to get some water.” I replied not quite knowing what to say
“Okay well get back to bed its going to be a long day tomorrow and you cannot be tired,” my mom mumbled already heading back to bed.
I turned off the water and closed my eyes. Why did we have to move? Ever since that dreadful day I found out we were leaving I have had bad dreams. I really did not want to go to school tomorrow. There would be a bunch of kids to make fun of me and a bunch of teachers to embarrass me by making me stand up and introduce myself. I turned of the light and headed back to my room.
 The light was on and now I was staring at the cracked paint wall. There were many boxes still waiting to be unpacked and a single chair with my clothes for school on it. None of my posters were up and my desks were still not here yet. I already knew that California was a lot different than Alaska. I was already sweating and in Alaska I was shivering. I still don't know why we lived in Alaska but it had to be better than here. Anywhere was better than here. Here the sun fried you and it smelt of saltwater carried up from the ocean. It wasn't so great. I don't see why people take vacations here.
“Lizzy, wake up you’re or going to be late.” My mom said interrupting my thoughts. “Come on you don't have all day.”
“Five more minutes,” I pleaded.
“Up, now, and no more complaints I'm tired of them.”
I opened my eyes and slowly sat up. Today was going to be dreadful. I got out of bed and put on my new clothes. Then I went to the mirror to look at myself. I didn't look bad. But as soon as I put on my glasses it was all going to change. I looked good, without my glasses, but with them I looked horrible. My mom always tells me how cute I look in them. Yeah, right. I looked at the time. I wish my dad would’ve been here. It was my first day at school but he was at our old house getting the rest of our things together.
I walked downstairs after brushing my teeth and curling my hair and I popped a piece of bread into the toaster.
“Morning sweetie, are you excited for your first day of school?”
“Nope,” I replied with an attitude I really hadn’t meant to use but I was frustrated.
Our eyes locked and the only thing that broke that was the toaster. I looked away and pulled out my toast spreading it with butter.
“Bye mom, love you.” I looked back as she shut the door on me.
“Bye,’ she called
I slowly walked to the bus stop where students were already boarding. I let myself be the last one on which was a bad idea because the bus driver didn't recognize me so I almost got left out. I stepped on the bus and it got quiet. I only heard faint whispers followed by fingers pointing at me. I quickly started walking to the back of the bus to find a seat there. The only open one was next to a tall guy who tripped me before I could sit down. The whole bus laughed at me and I hid my face the rest of the way to school.
I walked up to the office and introduced myself, “Hi, I’m Elizabeth Schultz it’s my first day here.”
A lady with big rimmed glasses looked up at me. Her bleached blonde hair was pulled tightly into a bun and her lips were pursed together with wrinkles forming around the edges. “Yes hold on a moment please.”
I stood there swaying gently side to side as she typed things into the computer and scrolled up and down with the mouse. After what seemed like ages she stood up went to a printer and handed me my schedule. I smiled at her and opened m mouth to say thanks but she was back to staring at her computer.
I opened the door and all in the room looked at me, including the teacher. “Students we have a new student with us today, her name is Elizabeth.”
“I go by Lizzie if that’s okay.”
The teacher nodded and I looked at my schedule Mr. Coleman. “Please go take a seat bye Lexis she is the blonde in the far right.”
I walked to my seat and Lexis looked away but the girl behind me smiled and introduced herself. Her name was Summer.
I hated her already I didn't know why exactly but I suppose she was being nice to me and that’s what I didn't understand she would pretend to be nice then end up being popular so when I confronted her in front of her friends I would be embarrassed and laughed at. “Hi do you have any siblings?”
“Mhm I have a brother and three sisters,” she answered with a huge smile on her face since she thought I was being nice.
“Oh I think I met your sisters they are like you. I think there names are Winter Spring and Autumn.”
Summer looked away and so did I, I stared to the front of the room and watched the Mr. Coleman lecture on and on about geometry. I hoped I could make it through the rest of the day but I wasn't sure if that was possible. I still had Language with Mrs. Sane then P.E with Mr. Green, woodshop with Mr. Sharp, History with Ms. Salamari and then Science with Miss. Barger.
Finally the bell rang and I ran from fourth period escaping more ridicule and introductions, false information forcing me to be late for class or to do something wrong. I hated it her already. But now it was lunch, I looked around and flinched as I saw Summer sitting alone. I knew I shouldn’t have said what I said but maybe I could fix it. I walked to her and she stood up with her lunch. I put my hand on her shoulder but she jerked away. So I was left to eat lunch alone. My other friends, I thought about them as I lay down on the field. Everything was different here. It was always crowded and always hot people looked and acted different, what they wore was different and the food was different. They served milk in bags here, I threw that away with out drinking it and also the chicken sandwich was hard. I threw that away after a bite. The bell rang and I went to my fifth period.
I got home and went to my room as my mom stood up to come talk to me. I didn't stop though, I stormed up to my room and locked the door. My mom knocked “Lizzie come on now your day couldn't have been that bad.”
“Well it was, now go away.”
I heard my mom leave and I was surprised it was that easy. I wished she had stayed. I needed her to threaten to ground me unless I opened the door, to come in and comfort me, but she didn't and that was that.
When I got back from school the next day my dad was home. I was mad at him so instead of greeting him I let my childish instincts come out and I screamed, “I hate you dad, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. You just had to get a new job didn't you?”
“Lizzie please you know that this job pays more and I missed you too so come to dinner with me and your mother tonight won’t you?”
“No I hate you and see no reason to go to dinner with the money you make from California. It sucks here and I hate it so go away you go to dinner with California money.”
My dads face filled with sorrow but he stood up and out of his briefcase pulled a gift with a bow on the top. Then he and my mom left. I stood there in shock then I knew that I really wanted to go so I ran outside but they were already gone. I tried my mom’s cell but I heard it ringing and noticed she had left it. My dad didn't have a cell yet so I took a deep breath and lay on the couch. I carefully opened the gift and burst into tears. Why had I treated him so badly? The gift wasn't much but it meant much to me. It was a book, A Time For Dancing under the book was the movie. I had been begging for them both for ages. After my tears stopped I started to read. A little bit later I noticed the time. My parents had been gone for hours and I started to worry but soon drifted into a deep sleep.
I awoke to the sound of footsteps outside and I smiled and shook my head. I can’t believe my parents were just arriving home. I jumped up and went outside to greet them. But my heart jumped a mile when I noticed it wasn't them. It was the police.
“Are you Elizabeth?”
I nodded, as my throat began to burn.
“I am very sorry but if your parents are Mr. and Mrs. Frank and Jennifer Shultz then we found them dead at about 11:30 last night. We had to do some research and about 3:00 this morning we found out about you and figured we would wait until you would be awake to tell you the news.”
I keeled over and the officer caught me and hugged me until I started to get drowsy and then my tears stopped. I couldn't cry any longer. I wanted to but I couldn't I was tired and upset and I hated myself so much for the way I had acted but it was to late now. It was done.
I awoke in my bed. It was all a bad dream. Like I said I have been having bad dreams since the day I found out we were moving. But that’s when I saw it. The book, the movie and my so called dream was a reality.
I learned a lesson right then and there that I needed to follow and I would. No matter where I ended up I knew that I needed to live my life to its fullest. I closed my eyes and sat up. I was ready to endure whatever life threw at me, a lesson that I learned the hard way. I love my parents no matter where they were and I had to believe that they knew that too.



Copyright © 2009 Colette Schiller
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