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Short Stories - Reviews |
A Wolf's Tale by L A Winterburn (14) "Oh my God!! This is brilliant! I could actually see what was happening and feel the rabbit's fear and the wolf's anticipation. GREAT JOB!!" -- karen. "Again WOW...excellent man!" -- John C. "Damn...this is LLLLLLOOOONGGGG!!!!" -- Does it matter?. ""To does it matter" I'm not quite sure what you are trying to tell me. Is this a good review or a bad review? I am just asking because your review is so confusing, and doesn't really tell me if you like the poem or not. Could you please clarify what you are trying to say. Thankyou" -- The Author. "I mean just what i said "this is loooong". The length made it boring and completely stretched out. It was more of a long novel than a poem. " -- does it matter?. "Sorry it was too long for you "Does it matter" Maybe you should try reading something a bit more taxing, were you dont need to use your immagination. Or maybe something that requires more than a 10 second attention span, Something like a limeric?" -- The Author. "LMAO @ the lymeric bit...that was funny. I think some people just aren't able to handle more than one or two lines, and secondly maybe "does it matter" doesn't understand some of the bigger words that you used such as the ones with more than 3 letters. "Does it matter" you should try the childrens section next time. This poem is brilliant, well thought out and executed!!!" -- Michelle. "*rolls eyes* Maybe you should try some anxiety medicine, would that help you a bit? And by the way, i'm greatly hurt by your harsh "big words". The point of posting your work on here is to receive feedback and opinions from other people. Obviously you don't have the tolerance and open mind that requires you to accept that not everyone is going to bow down before you and love your work.Not all of the readers are going to give you a sugar coated review. Obviously you're not used to having a wide range of opinions. The point of freedom of speech is to allow us to be able to have our OWN opinions and think for ourselves. And you think that I'm immature, haha. If you can't handle negative reviews, then you shouldn't even bother posting your work on here.I'm sorry to have to burst you're little bubble, but that's the straight up truth. Have a nice day, and happy writing." -- does it matter?. "Hey "does it matter" have you read any of my other poems? because if you had on a few of them i have recieved, I wouldn't say bad reviews but maybe not as good as i would like, and i haven't been annoyed or slagged off who ever has written it. Most of the time I say thank you to whoever has given me the feed back. Any way the point I am trying to make is that on most of the bad reviews i have had it has been constructive. not just and I qoute "Damn this is long" and in your other review it said it was a short novel? I totally agree with you about the every one having there own point of veiw though, if we were all the same and liked all the same things the world would be pretty boring. But I gues what made me angry about your review was the fact it just showed alot of nievity. Oh by the way why dont you use your real name?" -- The Author. "I'd just like to thank your for at least seeing my point. And, i do agree that my review wasn't constructive. Um..why did you ask why i don't use my real name? " -- does it matter?. "I'd also like to point out that it's ironic how you made fun of me for "not understanding big words"...and yet, you don't exactly spell smaller words correctly. I'm not trying to start another fight over this, i just wanted to point this out to defend myself." -- does it matter?. "Errrr typing mistakes? I was just pissed off so didn't bother to check it ok? And besides you prob used a spell checker so dont even bother to have a go at me." -- lee. "Oh and by the way "Does it matter" I didn't say anything regarding your lack of vocabulary, That comment was made by Michelle. So I would appreciate it if you would get your facts strait first, and about your name "Does it matter" obviously your reviews dont." -- The Author. "See, there you go again...Must be "that time of month"...I wasn't even trying to start another fight.You think I use a spell checker? haha..that's funny. What would be the point of that? I don't strive for complete perfection.And what about my name? There you go again, complaining b/c you don't like it. Damn, aren't u ever satisfied? Oh and by the way, obviously my reviews DO matter. And thank you for NOT saying anything regarding my vocabulary." -- does it matter?. A Bunny's Tale by L A Winterburn (6) "Absolutely BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Very well written!" -- John. "it's too long! you didn't have to give so many details, maybe you did that just to make it BORING.it's not at all appealing. a person would stop at the 4th stanza and don't bother to read all of it. maybe because it's about a bunny. and the title is but since i'm so nice. i read the whole thing.i don't think i understand the message you are trying to give. maybe this is a symbolic poem but it's too long to be one. the title is so prosy and there is no meaning behind this piece of work because you tell the whole thing out." -- lori-ann. "*****um...I read the first stanza and the last two. I was happy to see that the lil' bunny died at the end though. I hate poems that have furry little animals frolicking happily in grassy fields. But, i gotta agree with lori-ann, this was a tinky bit long." -- d donely. "Please people!! If your attention span is that short maybe you shouldn't bother reading most of my work. You might be better of watching cartoons. Oh and for those of you that think it was too long, how do you think I should shorten it? I could put. "there once was this bunny that frolicked around, then a wolf came a hunting and sniffing the ground, Then the wolf ate it" there, the end, finished, your lot. you happy now?" -- The Author. "I agree with the author completely; this piece is a series of events that takes place whilst a bunny rabbit is trying to find food. The point of the poem is to build up the fear and anxiety the rabbit feels. The fact that the rabbit dies isnt a good thing. If you can't handle long poetry then definitely dont read anything by Dante or Shakespear as it is sure to be quite over your head and would take way too much time from your day. As he said maybe your should try cartoons that are simple and geared more toward a less mature audience. " -- Michelle. "Well, first off i would like to say this poem SUCKS!!! Second of all you should try writing stories instead of poems that make no sense. Also in your reply that poem was the best you have written maybe you should try more like that. Well that's all i have to say. Bye." -- Me. I Am Sin by Judith Goff (8) "Very good!! I'm glad I have influenced you at least a little and have inspired you to write at a furious pace!" -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "You have !!!!!! You've awakened a sleeping monster (:o)" -- Judith. "Judith...this is brilliant. I love Vampire pieces and this one and one by L.A. Winterburn called "Tender" (its on storymania also) are just brilliantly written. Great Job!!! I llok forward to reading more of your work. p.s. Thanks for the review for "Little Pieces of Me"." -- Michelle. "Thanks so much, Michelle ... There are more vampires, hope you enjoy them" -- Judith. "Hey Judith! You seem to be one of the vamp experts on here so thought you could read my poem "Thirst" and tell me what you think. Thanks! " -- Michelle. "A momument to creative potentiality...your voice is clear and language poetic, but you could have made the scene more subtle, and thus more sublime, by incorporating less (so that the reader can fill in the gaps with his/her knowledge of vampire mythology)." -- Cole, Amherst, MA, USA. "Cole, thank you for the critique ... I wonder, however, why you resorted to vulgarity and cruel adolescent taunts when reviewing 'The Bell Tower. Constructive feedback is appreciated ..." -- Judith. "Wow Judith this was excelent and gave me goose bumps. I dont agree with Cole either, I think that some poems do require subtle immagery to allow the reader his own immagination to take over. But I also feel that there is a place, for poems that set a scene and tell a story, describing things in details to allow a build up of tention. Check out my "A wolf's tale and a Bunny's tale." Any way, again very nice work I liked it alot." -- Lee Winterburn. Why Do People Laugh At Me? by Musau (4) "Dude, do us a favor and stop submitting your work on this website.From the looks of this poem I can tell why people are laughing at you." -- David. "this did make me cry.it made me cry because i can't believe i took the time to read this piece of junk.take up knitting." -- bm, fs, usa, ny. "Oh come on every body, People do get laughed at. So what if this person has written on this subject. Its not a bad poem. Ask for example disabled persons - they would have plenty of comments on beinging laughed at. Yes l do like this poem. You should give honest opinions. " -- Amy, Hayes, UK. "David!! Who put you up to this? You seem to be my most avid reader. Why? Something has really caught you eye. Try to take away another man's glory will always make a sad story, and that sad story is YOU! My friend, or should I say, my enemy." -- MUSAU, Los Angeles, California, USA. Where You From? by Musau (2) "What the fuck is wrong with you guy?Are you serious about this racist poem you wrote? Let me give you some advice,take a writting class,study other poetry writings on this website.Then before you submit it on the website run it by I few people and see what they think.Don't continue to embarass yourself by putting your pointless dribble on this site." -- David. "Hi David! Did this really get under your skin? YOU are the racist, my friend. Were you abused as a child? You certainly got some serious problems. I would love to feed you to the dogs and watch the maggots eat you up. Excuse me. I don't think the maggots would touch your filthy flesh, you maggot, you!" -- MUSAU, Los Angeles, California, USA. What Is A Bum? by Musau (3) "i like it...no time for poetry, just what 'is'." -- Salai, uk. "Hey Salai! You like it! What is there to like? The only way a person can see things thru a bums eyes is if he's a bum himself." -- David. "David! David! Oh! My poor David! You are the BUM I am talking about. Can't you read between the lines? Of course not. You don't have the intellect..." -- MUSAU, Los Angeles, California, USA. What Do You Do by L A Winterburn (1) "awwwwwwwwwww that is so cute...my kids liked it a lot hehe" -- Karen. Waves by D Donely (3) "This I Like. Short, snappy, and without fuss." -- Ulysses Hero, England. "Interesting... I don't think I've ever seen a haiku on Storymania before." -- Brooklyn Ashe, Illinois, USA. "Excellent use of the Haiku." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. Waiting by L A Winterburn (6) "Very discriptive language and clear delivery. You're getting more talented by the day :)" -- Karen. "That's a pretty good piece. I think it's sad however that he only had one way out." -- Sean, OR, USA. "Yeah it is sad that he only had one way out. But I dont think that there was any other way of ending it. Any way I am sick of the good guy all ways winning read my story the visitor lol" -- The Author. "shouldn't have ended it that way. should have ended it in a slow, touching, emotional way. a way that'll fit the structure of the poem. like he changed his mind about actually killing himself. know what i mean?" -- lori-ann. "No Lori-Ann I dont know what you mean. Did you actually read the poem and understand it? the fact is, the man was a werewolf and although i dont say "the man is a werewolf" it is actually hinted at during the peice, and to say that maybe he could have changed his mind shows niavety in the sense of, it was a man who had no where to go and no one to turn to. So you tell me another way out of his predicament? considering that he is a monster that is going to kill indiscriminately whenever there is a full moon." -- the author. "*****This was good. I liked the choice that the man/wereworlf made at the end. " -- d donely. Trying To Blend by D Donely (2) "Crit: At 14 your good [wish I was as good at that age], but you can be better. Don't be afraid of punctuation. Yes you will get it wrong at times [like me], but it's the only way we will learn. Stretch out, unfurl those literary arms, and write." -- Ulysses Hero, England. "yeah it's better to be different. like that poem." -- lori-ann. Those Eyes by Judith Goff (6) "As inspired by a strange man sitting across a bar from a beautiful woman. She was drawn to his eyes. I seem to recall this in a story I've read somewhere....." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "Really???? I wonder where?????" -- Judith. "wow this is really good.... the last line really brings out the whole poem..." -- melonnie. "Melonnie, so glad you are enjoying my work, words like yours keep me in there" -- Judith . "So he was`nt a cyclops then?Just joking.Brilliant!" -- Stuart Eric Longridge. "No, he wasn't, Stuart ... perhaps then I could have resisted! haha" -- Judith. The Youths Will Be Heard! by Musau (1) "it's good and please send me poem and stories inmy e-mail thanks ilove ur work" -- kivumbi, kampala, uganda, none. The Storm by D Donely (2) "If you're writing like this at 14 you'll be sensational as you mature. Take a look at some of my work if you get a chance." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "simple and prosy but i like it." -- lori-ann. The Mighty Tornado by Musau (1) "Beautifully written, One must not estimate the power of God, How in seconds live can be wiped out and homes destroyed. And not to forget that these are all material things - We come into this World naked and we go back naked. Our faith is tested during these times in how we think about the less fortunate during these difficult times. It is Gods creation and he can do what he pleases. Nice work." -- Amy, Hayes, UK. That's Life by D Donely (2) "Crit: slow down on the rhyme and concentrate on saying more. " -- Ulysses hero, England. "i like it." -- lori-ann. Take Life.... by D Donely (1) "nice poem. reminds me of the way i write poems." -- lori-ann. Stalker by Diane Copeland (1) "Interesting. I like the way you wrapped the story up in a concise manner. Check out some of my work as they relate to stalkers of the night." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. Reverso by Ulysses Hero (1) "man, its easy to comment on your work because they're all good. clever stuff. wish i could write poetry like that." -- the rube. New Path by Keri McGriff (3) "This would make a beautiful epitaph. " -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. "McGriff the Crime Dog. Rrrrgh... Take a bite out of crime." -- KungFu Gibbon. "This tiny poem works." -- Peter Rivendell. My Way by D Donely (3) "Good job!! I love this stanza...Telling me what's right Telling me what's wrong I'm taking the back way No matter how long " -- Karen. "You have an amazing talent for writing poems. This was very well written. I especially like the: Look in the mirror//What do you see?//Your so manufactured//As cut out as can be You did a wonderful job." -- Sara Roggy. "*****:) thanks!" -- d donely. My Friend The Tiger And Me by Sue (Sooz) Simpson (7) "This sucks!" -- Anonymous. "You know Anonymous, or should I say Mr. Gibbon, you're the only thing around here that sucks. This is a finely crafted piece of workmanship, whereas you are a finely crafted piece of..." -- Banjo Man. "Hey Banjo Woman! Watch where you aim that thing, I just got done saying how great Sooz's other piece is. St.George was right, you are an idiot." -- KungFu Gibbon. "That's okay I'm not keen on this one anyway. Mind I remember being quite chuffed with it when I wrote it, and my son liked it. But, it would be nice to know 'why' it sucks. Okay your review has helped me enormously in that now I won't pin my hopes on the Nobel prize for literature on this piece. It will save me hours not having to think up a clever speech, but without knowing why it sucks the next piece I write is likely to be just as suckee. Thank-you 'both' for the reviews. Greatly appreciated. " -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. "I thought this was cute.Very Dr.Suess." -- danielle. "Thanks Gabrielle, Glad you liked it. " -- Sooz, Dalton-in-furness, England, Cumbria. "Olde Sergei�s Review: Fabulous " -- Cam Davis. Maja by Roberto J Moreno (2) "This one facinates me. On another writing site diaries have taken off with a bang. I am posting mine (with the permission of my partner) It's hard, brutal and honest everything good and bad, funny or sad, sexual and emotional that happens to and around me. If this hadn't been in poetry format it would read like a diary entry. From a poetic standpoint this one didn't touch me, but from an emotional one I thought it was wonderful, very truthful, very honest, very open. " -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. "I agree with Sooz on the technical aspects; sometimes verse doesn�t quite work with what we are saying, it is all a question of rythm. The story you tell is quite beautiful, the " unspeakable" matters. For more information on the subject yor poem deals on read D.H. Lawrence�s Sons and Lovers, specially the parts concerning Paul and Miriam. " -- Jorge Freire. Love Calls by Keri McGriff (1) "Another good piece, although I don't know if I would call it erotica (:o)" -- Judith Goff, USA. Jasmine And Gardenia Love by Sue (Sooz) Simpson (25) "Hmm, the "doth" sits a little awkwardly. But then who's bothered - it's no crime. " -- Fergus O'Ferguson. "Hello Fergus me old mate. Ugh ... actually I didn't hate this one as much as some of the others and re-worked it. Thanks :-) " -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. "Excellently rendered work." -- Banjo Man. "Thank-you, glad you liked it. " -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. "Monkey seriously unhappy. Storymania administration deleted my poem for no reason, only because I friends with JA St.George. He was right, they delete everything. They blow. Wanted to tell ya here, because they'll probably erase it everywhere else, and I wanted you to know why I'd "disappeared." Methinks that St.George was right, and they do fear him, and anyone he be nice to. They blow, just wanted ya to know, because you a nice lady. Ooo Ooo Ooo." -- KungFu Gibbon. "I know where you're coming from man, the moron and/or morons who run this place piss everybody off. The site is difficult to use, most of my posts come out in bright colors that are impossible to read, that's of course when the administration isn't deleting people's work and posts. Then they have the nerve to say you can post just about anything here, when we know that's not true. I mean look at the number of works that get deleted that no one even realizes were on the board. The the ole administration denies they were ever there, or makes up some lie to cover there own ass, and usually their reason makes me laugh because it's such a lame excuse. This place used to be teeming with writers and reviewers of all sorts just a few years ago... can't imagine why they're not here anymore (dripping with sarcasm). If you want contact me at [email protected]." -- Anonymous. "Hey KungFu, or anybody else, if you're looking for a better site, might I suggest the Writer's Digest.com. They're the one's that produce the magazine that many of us writers use as our bible. I'm finding it to be a valuable resource, but they also have links to many other great writing sites that don't give you quite the same grief that Storymania does. You need to remember KungFu that this place is basically just a place to show off your work, and that's it, it's not really a writing site, like St.George was saying it's exclusive and since they are simply and solely a business dedicated only to themselves they can snobbishly throw out anybody they want. However, I like it because I'm just looking to post my work and hopefully catch the attention of a publisher with a work that is automatically e-copyrighted. I don't require reviews that I know I'll never get, or poor ones, and I don't bother with the rest of the site. Take care KungFu, that was a pretty funny poem, too bad that nobody'll ever know." -- Tim. "But did you like the poem?" -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. "Well, if you're talking to me Sooz, then yeah I liked the poem. Like I said I thought it was hilarious. Now if you're suggesting that the administration delteted it because "they" didn't like it, then you are proving what so many other people have been saying all along. Imagine if they don't like a peice that you write Sooz, and then the next thing you know, all traces of Sooz are gone. I'm expecting it to happen to my work, which would royally piss me off just like these other guys and gals. I mean why did they delete, because it was about Coco Puffs, hell the guy didn't even spell it right, or maybe they didn't like bunny terds? Who knows? P.S. if you're talking about did I like your poem then ya I guess I did, though I really only came here to comment on this thread, since ya know that when there are five + reviews that usually means that a work is really great or people are having a discussion." -- Tim. "Nice work all around Sooz. And for the thread here that just wasn't right what they did to KungFu, I thought they were trying to get more writers to come here, but by their actions it sure doesn't look that way." -- Christina P.. "A vehement torrid account of love...a f**king beautiful poem...congratulations" -- salai. "Sooz, "Return of the Hellcat" was an outstanding example of creative short fiction, now this poem is just as dynamic and powerful, as I said before I only wish I could write like this. Excellent piece of work! " -- Monte. "Who the hell is this KungFu Gibbon. There ain't no record of a KungFu Gibbon ever having used this site let alone posted some poem. I also wanted to correct the dumb s.o.b. who spelled it wrong too, it's Cocoa Puffs." -- Butte S. McKraken. "An insight of poly-drenched haze on windswept mind journeys." -- Author of Teeth. "God I hate poets they're so damned pretentious, what the Fv(k is "insight of poly-drenched haze on windswept mind jouryneys" is that supposed to be a compliment or insult? " -- Anonymous. "Yeah, and like you're so much better Anonymous, you wouldn't know great poetry like that of Sooz Simpson and Fergus O'Ferguson if it bit you in the hind quarters. Since you fail to understand the meaning of such poetic language it only goes to show how dim you truly are. Why don't you just leave, no one wants someone so ignorant about." -- Name Withheld. "Please don't be mad at me too Name Withheld, but I don't really understand what it means either, despite a love of poetry." -- Christina P.. "I read the poem, and I liked it a lot. I also read the reviews, and I'm not a little confused. I'm new here. Could someone please explain it to me?" -- Pearl. "In regards to Butte's question, there's no evidence of KungFu Gibbon ever having been here, becasuse Storymania erased it all, isn't that right Sooz, I mean you saw it too." -- Kym Kendrick. "Sooz denies everything. She always side with Storymania administration no matter how bad they get. Sooz probably is Storymania Administration. Me eat Sooz too!" -- Grunt Woggler. "Hey! We'll have no eating of Sooz here pal. I thought this board was to be free of sexual inuendo. Hee! hee! hee!" -- Tim. "For heaven's sake people, stop with all the reviews. If St.George were still here he'd kick all of your asses for wasting so much space with non-critiques. Since he ain't here I guess I'll have to do it, then quietly mosey along myself. After this message I want to only see critiques/raves/jeers or I'll hunt you all down like dogs." -- Kym Kendrick. "Who the hell you lady to tell Grunt what to do? Me eat you too. Yum, yum, schlorp!" -- Grunt Woggler. "Olde Sergei�s Review: Marvelous" -- Cam Davis. "Thank you :-)" -- Sooz, Dalton-in-Furness, England, Cumbria. If Dali Wrote Poetry: by Ulysses Hero (4) "sorry but its just shit... " -- salai. "To someone with no knowledge of who Dali is, his work, or to his crazed manic mind, I guess to these same uneducated persons with their childish flair for profanity, yes I agree, it is defecation on paper. " -- Ulysses Hero, England. "Bravo, Ulysses!!!!! I can well imagine a Dali to match this poem!!!! In St Petersburg, Fl we have a wonderful Dali Museum!!!!" -- Judith Goff. "This poem is a work of art just like Dalis pieces,i can honestly say that this makes me want to sqeeze a big rancid thick shite out of my well fucked ass pipe.fuckin gimp" -- Captain japseye, atlantis. I Am The Most Loved Peson by Sadaf Shahab (2) "wwow.....1!1 its really a class..!" -- fizza, karach. "ITS SUPERV KEEP IT UP............ N PATA HAE KEYA!!!!! I M GONA SEND THIS POEM 2 MY LOVE. HAYA SHE IS SO SWEET N SHE LOVES ME ALOT LIK I DO" -- SULEJ, KARACHI, PAKISTAN. Fantasy .... Reality by Judith Goff (6) "I like this one! " -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "R Bennett ... as always I value your opinion" -- Judith. "A lot sure can happen in a moment. I really understood this one. The last line in particular. " -- JM. "Again, JM, we connect. Thank you so much for all of your positive reinforcement" -- Judith. "Im wondering is that your real surname?Or is it Goth?Deep" -- Stuart Eric Longridge. "LOL, Stuart! Thanks!" -- Judith. Dreamer by David B Doc Byron (3) "Applause please. One of the better pieces of poetry on storymania. Well done from ole Tragic Jack!" -- Jack Brown. "well, Doc ... first thank you for the review of Aftermath ... a much appreciated compliment !!! As for your 3rd reason for writing, I wonder ????? ... now for this piece, you remind me of another writer posting on this site ... Hmmmmm ... I really enjoy your work !!" -- Judith Goff. "WHOA! " -- Michelle. A Ruined Land by D Donely (1) "Hey donely, you've been so kind to review my stuff I thought I would give yours a look :-) I really liked this one. The last stanza really hit home and tied in the whole thing. Good job." -- Eric Richards, Gainesville, Fl, USA. A Poem by D Donely (5) "Again, very nice. " -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "similair to that other poem." -- lori-ann. "I really liked this. You have talent and it will be brought out the more you continue to write. Try working with your rhyme schemes; mix them up a bit and try something new. Always remember to never force a rhyme as well. If you are not happy with a word, change it. Those are words that I live by." -- B C Mercer. "To be fair, I've taken a cross-section of your poetry for study (your first and last piece). Title: The title is un-intriguing, merely listing what it is. One of the lamest excuses commonly given by poets is �It doesn�t matter what I write, or what I call it because I only write for myself.� If that were the case, then why am I viewing it? In other words, a change of title is in order to make your audience interested. Text: No spelling errors, no misused words, correct meter, and even simple rhyme every other line. It however does not focus on anything specific, which is not a grave error, but does lack a certain point. " -- JA St. George. "I liked this poem but I to feel you should come up with a better title.I've noticed that you haven't posted on this website for a few years.Did you stop writing? Just wondering." -- David Daniels. A Freind To The End by L A Winterburn (3) "Sweet!!! :)" -- Karen. "reword the title. you know why. i have to say i like it. um...my poems seem to be very, completely different from your poems.anyway it's so simple. guess you may think that's the only way to write those sort of 'mate' poems." -- lori-ann. "Errrrr no I dont know why I should reword the title. Please explain it to me. Oh and if you want to review my work I dont mind constructive critasism if you let me know the reasons why I should make a change or why you feel my work is lacking something. " -- The author. -The End- by Tim Baker (1) "Impact Succeeded. I believe you have captured the very essence of the emotion, well done." -- Krige, South Africa. What Makes Me Wait? by L A Winterburn (2) "I'd wait forever if you asked me to..." -- ;). "that waiting can be a bitch huh? nice little verse." -- just a guy. What A Morning by L A Winterburn (2) "This poem is excellent! You're very talented, Lee! Ever think about writing an epic poem?" -- Karen. "it's very descriptive and long. especially if you're just talking about waking up and the next thing you know it's a dream. i like it." -- lori-ann. Weary Day by Keri McGriff (3) "I like this [that may be a weak openning statement, but its true]. I like this because its simply put, does'nt mess around with unnecessary words; gets its message across." -- Ulysses Hero, England. "This is quite lyrical ... I really liked it ..." -- Judith Goff, USA. "i liked it lots of concrete imagery and nice metaphors, refreshing, well done. " -- Searching, wollongong, NSW, australia. Walk With Me by Keri McGriff (1) "Not as strong as 'Weary Day,' but I know what your trying to say. I would let the poem settle for a day or two then run with it again." -- Ulysses Hero, England. There Must Be More To Life Than Customer Service! by L A Winterburn (2) "LOL!!!! This is awesome...great job!" -- Karen. "This one I REALLY enjoyed !!! Have worked retail management all my life and this really hit home !!!!" -- Judith Goff, USA. The Nameless One by Catherine Phillippa Susan Dally (2) "Don't we all have at least one nameless one in our lives! Your poem echoes the passion of those who have dared to let go and sieze the moment with no regrets! " -- Monte. "Not bad. You have two typos though. "pleasure" in the first line and "nameless" in the second to last verse." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. Tender by L A Winterburn (2) "WOW!! This is my favorite vamp poem on here. I can so relate to the romanticism between the vamp and his lover. " -- :). "it's kind of mysterious. i can't say i hate it but it can pass." -- lori-ann. Rant by Rose Trimovski (1) "We were born on this world to go to heaven but it is earned and not handed over to us. Pity and pain are not to answers. This is a very perplexing poem which leaves me with the desire to read more." -- Joe. Prisoner by David B Doc Byron (3) "And away goes the soul." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "First time I've looked at your work Doc! A nice piece of writing here. Very impressed with how prolific you are, you certainly don't lack for good idea's for stories and the words "writer's block" doesn't appear to be in your vocabulary! Looking forward to reading more.." -- Monte, USA. "Doc ... This was wickedly good fun!!!!!! I've posted some more stuff, check it out .. a couple poems and short stories, always appreciate your input!!!" -- Judith Goff. One Last Time by M F J Baker (2) "Oh wow, that is so nice. I can see your soul reaching out one more time. your words describe the experience so well. Em" -- Emily, Adelaide, SA, Australia. "It is rather sweet and appeals to the romantic." -- daphie, lokoja, nigeria, kogi. Oh! What A Surprise by Stuart Eric Longridge (1) "Nice one Stu." -- Ali P, Belfast, N.I.. No More Tears by Acosha (1) "You should only use commas when they are needed and they aren't needed at the end of every line. " -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. Night by M Q Walters (8) "This poem works,it communicates the loneliness you felt in a way your readers can feel. Yes, it is sad, but nevertheless important for you to express...to help you heal your wounds." -- Monte, usa. "Alone. I am always alone. Yet, somehow I welcome the darkness." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. " RBO..Perhaps the darkness is what you favor because it is easier to hide there..." -- mattie walters, va. "I'm not one for hiding. I'm always right out front." -- R. Bennett . "Now Mattie...ya gotta see by now...no one is "always" there...wake up girl!! " -- mandi. ""always"? Is that like "forever"? In fairytales perhaps, am too old to believe in those or soul mates or you know the rest :)" -- mattie. "somtimes i hide in the darkness but sometimes i like to hide with someone who can reasure me and say "I'm always here" Somtimes it's better to hide with someone then to hide alone. Do you know what I mean?" -- David D. "I think I know what you mean David...but when you hide with someone else, then you hide together.Wonder if that made sense. I think we all have a lil something to hide from. Thanx heaps for all the reviews :)" -- mattie. My So-Called Life by Judith Goff (12) "Alone. How that word pierces the heart." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. "Impales with longing for that which could never be ...." -- Judith. "Been there. Done that. I could relate to the message of clinging to what you want..." -- mia angello, WI, USA. "Guess we've all been there before, just some of us hang on much too long to that elusive dream ... thanks for the review ! " -- Judith. "Thanks Judith! I enjoyed this one just as much as the others. Yes, I have been there before. Sometimes I wonder why I am willing to go there again." -- JM. "Thank you once again, JM ... it does appear we have some things in common, or is it just common to womankind?" -- Judith. "Yes, I do believe we have some things in common. I think there are probably some men who have been there too though." -- JM. "I know that to be true, JM ... Do you post here?" -- Judith Goff. "Judith, one thing I don't have in common with you is that I am not a writer. I am just someone who loves to read and a friend of mine directed me to this site. I look forward to reading Amarantos. Keep up the good work!" -- JM. "You Know, JM, that makes it even better ... To get the opinion of readers is invaluable !!! I hope you enjoy Amarantos!" -- Judith. "This is the second piece i've read by you and i know i am going to go down the list, i love your style, you have a great talent...your writing feels familiar, perhaps because you reach your readers and they can identify with the emotions you capture in your writing, and that's the greatest talent, when you can touch so many people with just one piece. keep writing and thank you for sharing your work." -- Moonlit Gitana, Vancouver, Canada. "Thank you. I'm happy you enjoyed this one. I haven't posted on this site for a very long time, but I received your comments and had to at least acknowledge you! Things like this brighten an otherwise melancholy day ~" -- Judith. Love Hurts by L A Winterburn (2) "your poem aren't at all better than mine. and based on the reviews you gave me. i thought your work would have been extraordinary!i guess the only exceptional poet i'd look up to is my aunt. anyway enough about me. about the poem. it's just too simple and there are many meanings behind this work but you didn't give us a clue on which precise one. this could be longer since it's about love but that's just my opinion." -- lori-ann. "january 27 2004- Hi, I like your poem...it shows the anger of love. poems describe ppl and i see u were hurt" -- Shiv, Petaling Jaya, Selangor, Malaysia. Let The Madness Cease by L A Winterburn (1) "This poem is awesome!!!! Great job!!" -- Karen. I Truly Love You by Catherine Phillippa Susan Dally (1) "This poem was sweet, honest, open and full of hope! " -- Monte. Holly Marie by L A Winterburn (2) "it's a fantasy kind of poem. if you don't know why i said that don't worry about it. " -- lori-ann. "Yes yet again Lori-Ann your review makes less sense than your poetry, and that is saying something." -- the author. Gem by Tim Baker (1) "Tim, this one is pretty good. I like the structure, or non-structure, I should say. The only thing I find confusing is that u dont say why she turned away. Its not even inferred. I think it would be much more powerful if u could leave the reader guessing, rather than clueless, about what might have happened. You are talented...keep writing!" -- Karen, USA. Funeralchant Macabre by David B Doc Byron (1) "As I finished reading this, my first thought was "I wonder who he stole this from." Actually this sounds like an appropriate eulogy for yourself. " -- Richard. Fools by Catherine Phillippa Susan Dally (1) "I think in life there are times when we are the culprit and the victim, which is what your poem suggest! What goes around comes around...what you reap you will sow... your karma will always come back to you, are just three often used cliche's that are so true! Hopefully, we learn from our mistakes, as we get older and hopefully become wiser when it comes to matters of the heart! Your poem for me is about these growing pains. " -- Monte. Bloodline by David B Doc Byron (3) "Another interesting piece here Doc. Where do you get these ideas? Keep em coming..." -- Monte, usa. "Doc, another twisted, perverse, piece I LOVE that about you !!!!! " -- Judith Goff. "BTW, Posted another poem, check it out !!!!" -- Judith Goff. At The Bus Stop by Ulysses Hero (1) "To UH; Hey man, I've been there, and, great stuff. But let me throw you one pointer; Ginger's last name is spelled Rogers. By the way, thanks for the positive review on ''Ghost town.'' But, unfortunately, due to limited time, the final chapters of Ghost Town, Redemption, will be put off indefinitely, and Letters From The wasteland will be deleted pretty soon. For now, I have to stick to short shorts, which Im good at, even though graphic, until my work schedule changes. right on and write on, Doc" -- david ''doc'' byron, vincennes, usa, ind.. As I Reach Home On A Rainy Morning by Ramkumar Menon (4) "It is easy to see that you've placed a lot of effort into the piece. Deep and moving, the reader has to be patient [as I am] to get the full feeling of your poem. You fill each line with waves of emotion. I'm of the opinion that it wont be appreciated by the good people within this forum. There loss. well done." -- Ulysses Hero, England. "I can relate to your experience and feelings..."Gods Own Country" is heaven on earth. " -- Vineetha Menon, Dubai, U.A.E. "Hi, you have a beautiful way with words, it is so visual,I have very quickly become your fan. I hope the others will take the time to read your work, congratulations.D" -- Diana Venditti. "Whatis Ramkumar doing with computers? He should be a poet; a writer. Keep your job; but don't give up writing. Beautiful experience of Motherland. I am with you." -- Soudamini Nath, Murrieta, CA, USA. A Spirit Of Rainy Day by Nida Khan (3) "hmm........bohat pyari hai ye dil ki pehli barish nida!" -- fizza. "This poem was very well written, especially since english is your second language. It gives off great imagery and expresses some deep feelings of spirituality and love for nature. I enjoyed reading it, keep up the good work, and you will get better and better in time." -- hana, New York, NY, USA. "Brilliant! I didn't even know english was you r second launguage until I read the second review!" -- Ian Goodall. A New Baby Born by L A Winterburn (2) "As the father of a brand new one myself, you've caught what ever dad sees and wants in the future for his child... thank you and keep up your shining work." -- lawrence (the rebel), melbourne, florida. "Wow! Short and sweet, yet right to the point! Bravo! I'm a mom. I felt like I went to the moon and back, looking into my baby boy's eyes. " -- Teresa, Blountville, TN., U.S.A.. Go to page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 |
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