This Is My Prayer In The Unger And Need (2) ¡§Please, I promise I won¡¦t judge you and I won¡¦t release a word until you say I can¡¨ Her nod said that she will tell me. Although her face had gone even paler I knew that I would protect her from whatever was out to get her. She was a long time friend and there was no way I was going to let that slip away now. Gathering her thoughts she started. ¡§ I was fifteen and I had had a fight with one of my friends and decided to walk the distance from her farm to ours. It was around seven and it was getting dark but I didn¡¦t worry. I was about a quarter of the way home when a car pulled up beside me grabbed my sweater ad pulled me into the car¡K. We stopped not far from there when he pulled my jeans of and raped me¡K¡¨ Trying to digest what she had just said was easier than seeing her standing in front of me her voice breaking with emotion and fear. ¡§I wont hurt you Layla¡K trust me and I will protect you¡¨ I whispered ¡§that wasn¡¦t even the worst part of it though¡¨ she said her anger and pain evident. ¡§ I got chucked out of the car and I had scratches all down my back from the stones. That didn¡¦t stop me from walking home, I shook the whole way home deciding whether or not I should talk to my parent or if I should just pretend that it never happened. It felt like I couldn¡¦t breath and the emptiness I felt in my heart made me withdraw from my surroundings.¡¨ She took a moment to regain her self while I stood there whishing to rewind time and make it all different. ¡§When I got home I told my mum and she went hysterical but my dad just stood there as I shook with fear. My dad talked to my mum and eventually she calmed but all he told me was to go upstairs take a shower and go to bed early. My mum seemed to have calmed down a bit and got me a robe and then filled the tub with lavender oil and warm water. That night I went to bed without a word and started to weep. I finally fell asleep but woke up soon after. I ran to the bathroom and I found myself unable to stop vomiting. I had been vomiting for hours on and off when my father finally came into the bathroom and told me that he will go to the police station with me next day. I begged him to let me stay home. I was so embarrassed by what had happened and definitely didn¡¦t want to see anybody about it. My father finally agreed to go by himself and they did track the guy down. I spent months locked up in my bedroom crying sleeping and cowering. I didn¡¦t feel safe for a long time and the worst thing was that my dad couldn¡¦t give a dam. He didn¡¦t give me a hug never said hi to me when I walked in the door and was away from home the times that he could get away. The last memory I have of getting anything loving from my father was when I was about 6 yrs old and we were in South-Africa on a camp with his business. There were no children around that was close to my age so I spent my time alone. Then one night we went up to a BBQ ground and it was around ten at night, we still hadn¡¦t eaten and the grownups were having fun. I walked up to my dad and told him that I wanted to go home because I was cold and tired and he took his jacket off placed around me and told me to go get a drink and lie down on the bench. My dad had never been the one to hug or such things but you know what, I didn¡¦t care before the rape because I didn¡¦t need it so badly. After it though I craved for my daddy¡¦s strong arms to protect me from the world but never once did that happen. In fact never once did my dad talk to me or hug me after that night. It was as if he came near me he would catch some kind of disease and it really hurt me. I can remember the one time my dad was heading for Singapore and he was outside with his luggage and I remember waiving to him thinking, why daddy? Why are you leaving me? And then the thought that haunted me for long after was, do you still love me?¡¨ Her shaking had stopped but tears still flowed freely down her face. ¡§All I wanted from him was for him to tell me he loved me or he was proud of me or even for him to say hi to me when he walked in the door after a trip away. I used to study so hard for my tests and afterwards I would come to him and tell him my results and he would only look up and say in a calm voice ¡§that¡¦s good¡¨ and then carry on with what he was doing. There were times when I whished he could ask me the simple question of what my favorite colour was or who my favorite songwriter was. I was dying for him to talk to me about something other than the farm or how I could make money.¡¨ I pulled her into my arms and she wept. I could see how badly she had needed to see acceptance from somebody. ¡§Layla, look at me, I wont walk away from you really this experience only makes me want to help you. I won¡¦t push you for the rest of the story now so let¡¦s go get some sleep and we can talk about this when you are ready.¡¨ I pulled her close again and we stood like that for a long time. I had always known that something had gone wrong after our final Rugby game because she seemed so far away, there but ever really there, Happy but never truly happy, and now I knew why. I felt like jumping of the boat and swimming to shore to give her father a good whack over the head. Get him to wake up and see his daughter who needed him so badly. We finally headed off bed and as soon as we were in bed we were asleep. The next day Kristy and Layla stayed in the cabin for most of the day while me and James entertained ourselves swimming in the pool and watching movies in the theater. That night I still couldn¡¦t sleep so I went outside only to find Layla sitting on the edge of the boat on a white seat stretching across the length of the boat. I slowly walked to her and sat down not to far away. ¡§You still happy to have heard my story or are do you regret asking?¡¨ ¡§I am not happy with what had happened to you but I feel privileged to have been trusted with such a piece of your life and no Lay I don¡¦t regret hearing it for one bit. I want you to understand that I would never intentionally hurt you.¡¨ She only gave a nod but that was all I needed. ¡§ Kristy is a good friend¡K.was she there before the rape or did she come after?¡¨ ¡§No,she has been there all along never once judging me. It was like we are twins. That night she could feel that I was upset but she didn¡¦t know about what so she got up and prayed for more than 20 minutes straight which was strange because she was only 15 yrs old and at that age we still don¡¦t understand the significance of a prayer but she did it anyways. After she told me about her feelings that night I told her about the rape all she did was hug me and didn¡¦t let go, we sat together not talking only holding each other. When the police caught the guy they had found out that he had planned to kill me but didn¡¦t as he got scared for some reason. I couldn¡¦t have been more grateful for her prayers. She came to visit me each day after school and brought my work teaching me and talking to me. She was the only person that could make me forget my pain, the only person that could make me laugh out loud and I loved her so much for that. After that incident we were inseparable and still are if you remember the cuffs and lock from the store the day of camp.¡¨ ¡§You seem a lot more at peace today than yesterday. Why?¡¨ ¡§I spoke to Kristy today and I told her about our talk last night, she told me to pray she said that I looked like I needed to pray so that is what we did for the most of the day. In between prayers we were cooking and laughing and then she said something that made me feel like a person again she told me that she loved me like her own sister and that she was so proud of me. The only way those words would have been sweeter is if it had come out of my fathers mouth. We spent a while going down memory lane and as we went through the years we soon picked up that we had ever had a fight. Never in our whole friendship. It took us a while to get the broad smiles of our faces but the shine in our eyes stayed. I feel so settled and I don¡¦t think you need to hear the rest of the story. Not because I don¡¦t trust you but because I feel that I should let go. I have done that and I feel free the only thing I can do now is pray and keep praying.¡¨ ¡§You are the bravest woman I have ever met Layla, it must have been so hard to trust others with that piece of you, something that we could have spread and ruined you but you didn¡¦t seem bothered by that.¡¨ ¡§Oh I am definitely not the bravest person but I trust God completely and now the only person I feel I need to tell is James. He has been like an older brother to me all my life and I have needed him to hear this but I was never ready. I can only hope that he can see past my imperfections like he has all my life. Promise me Robert that you will help me, I don¡¦t think I have the strength in me to tell him with out you and Kristy around.¡¨ ¡§I promise I will help you but aren¡¦t you worried about his response?¡¨ ¡§More than you will ever know, but I have to tell him. He has been the rock in my life and I need him to understand that it wasn¡¦t that I didn¡¦t want to talk to him but more that I was ashamed to talk to him. During my ¡§Depression¡¨ we grew distant, each time I looked at him I could see the hurt of not knowing what had happened in my life. He used to know my biggest crushes and try to set my up with them, he would talk to me when I looked like I had fallen off the face of the earth and he would make me laugh just because he wanted to.¡¨ Her face lit up as she talked about her cousin never once a hint of anger towards him never once could I see that she was disappointed in or hurt by him. How I wished to have that privilege. If I could be talked so highly about by her I would be floating on air. I had become undeniably attracted to her although not only by her physical appearance but also by her tender heart and protective soul. The love shining in her eyes made me jealous, if only that love was for me. As she sat there talking her soft lips curved into a smile and her sweet voice made me want to hold her close and never let go. Her electric blue eyes twinkled like the night sky as her long curly brown hair cascaded down her shoulders. The urge to twist one of the curls became intensely strong and I had the keep my hands occupied with a piece of string. ¡§Rob¡K will you tell him for me¡K..¡¨ the smile had slipped off her face and the shine in her eyes had dimmed with worry. ¡§It wouldn¡¦t be right for me to do that, I will sit with you and if he even dares to hurt you in any way, which I doubt, I will give him a good whack, after all I am a lot stronger than he is.¡¨ She nodded and the smile slipped back into place. ¡§Good, he needs his head to be screwed on, it fell off as soon as he saw Kristy. Has he said anything to you yet?¡¨ her voice was light and I could see her trying to hold back the giggles but finally she could no more and we sat there laughing with each other at our sneaky ways. ¡§Oh, he¡¦s said more than just one thing about her, in fact you might want to get her ready for a late movie tomorrow night. James asked me if I could pair up with you so he could go on a double date with KK.¡¨ ¡§As long as we pick the movie I will be fine with that but I wasn¡¦t aware there was an actual movie theatre on the boat.¡¨ ¡§Oh yes there is but it¡¦s on the top floor.¡¨ ¡§What!! We have been sitting on the floor watching suddenly thirty over and over and only now do you tell me that there is an actual movie theatre!¡¨ ¡§Well we figured we¡¦d surprise you¡K.SURPRISE! Did it work?¡¨ ¡§Uhhh, I just wont say anything to that okay¡¨ her mischievous glint in her eyes grew bigger and bigger and I really started to worry. ¡§I think I am going to go to sleep now but don¡¦t worry, the sabotage only starts tomorrow.¡¨ She giggled. ¡§you wouldn¡¦t! Well I¡¦ll just have to check everything I do and say hu?¡¨ ¡§Sure what ever you say, Night night¡¨ ¡§Night¡¨ I replied as I saw her walking over to her bed. How good would it be to be able to se her sleep ever night¡K. Man! Getting way over board here! Slow down buddy she¡¦s not even your girlfriend! „q As soon as I heard the soft snore of Robert sleeping, I went to the wardrobe and pulled out the blue tooth dye and tip toed into the bathroom, I then mixed in the blue dye into James and Rob¡¦s toothpastes and let it be. After I was sure my plan was going to work I snuck outside and lay on the pillowed seat. The breeze was soothing to my trumpeting heart and relaxing to my tense body. Tomorrow morning the boys would brush their teeth and about twenty minutes later the blue dye will stain there teeth making them look like complete monkeys each time the smiled. With my plan intact I slowly drifted off into a deep peaceful sleep. ¡§Layla, wake up girl¡¨ I slowly opened my eyes to find Kristy in front of me with a huge grin. ¡§Why you smiling so big?¡¨ ¡§He asked me out!¡¨ ¡§What? Who?¡¨ ¡§James!! He asked me out! Can you believe it, he wants me!¡¨ came her squeal of happiness. ¡§OOOh, what did you say? Please tell me you said yes?¡¨ ¡§Well I said I¡¦d think about it because it could just be awkward for you.¡¨ ¡§Aah, I am glad you¡¦re thinking of me but I¡¦d have you marry him right now because then we¡¦ll be related!! Go say yes girl! Wait what time is it?¡¨ I said letting the sun warm me. ¡§Umm, it almost 11:30. So you¡¦re cool if I say yes¡K¡¨ ¡§Of coarse but I am telling you that if you break his heart then I will come get you. Do me a favor though and wait till I¡¦ve told him my story. If he really likes you then he won¡¦t be stupid enough to come kill me then¡K I realize that I am asking for a lot and feel free to say no if your not comfortable with that¡K¡¨ ¡§Lay, I wouldn¡¦t want it any different. This will be good for me too because I could get my heart broken further down the track but this will help me decide what to do. I was actually hoping that would be the case¡K¡¨ I got up and gave her a hug so tight I thought I was going to strangle her. ¡§You¡¦re my best friend in the world and if he even so much as say something to hurt you then he is going to have a few broken bones!¡¨ and suddenly we burst out into full blow laughter.¡¨ ¡§Wait you said it is almost 11:30! I must look a mess.. Why didn¡¦t you wake me?¡¨ ¡§You were sleeping so peacefully that I figured I¡¦d leave you there, besides no body comes onto this level it is only our bedrooms here. And did you by any chance have anything to do with Blue teeth?¡¨ ¡§Yes¡K. Are their teeth still blue? Did you get a picture?¡¨ I said laughing so loud that I could feel my stomach cramping. ¡§Yes it is still blue and yes I did get a picture but you might just want to keep an eye out, they¡¦ve decided to sabotage your bed and that did not come from me!¡¨ ¡§WOW! Finally sleeping beauty! And I love my stunning teeth!¡¨ Rob¡¦s voice floated across my heart. He had just called me a sleeping beauty¡KOh what is wrong with you woman that only means that I was asleep along time so don¡¦t look too far into it or you might get your heart broken! Where is the brick wall you spent so long building? ¡§I thought you might¡¨ I giggled ¡§lets go have some lunch my stomach is growling¡¨ ¡§Ok but then afterwards lets go for a swim so that my two friends can show off there brilliant teeth¡¨ As we sat and ate lunch a peculiar feeling left me feeling sick and then all of a sudden it hit me ¡K.. ¡§Layla you don¡¦t look so good are you ok?¡¨ ¡§oh gosh, Kristy come with me to get some water please¡¨ She got my silent plea and came with me willingly. ¡§What¡¦s wrong Layla?¡¨ ¡§He¡¦s here¡¨ ¡§Who¡¦s here? You¡¦re kind of freaking me out¡¨ ¡§The person that raped me¡K I can smell him and I can feel him but I just can¡¦t see him¡¨ ¡§No, he¡¦s supposed to be in prison!¡¨ ¡§I don¡¦t know how why or when but he is here Kristy¡¨ I said. I looked down at my hands and saw that they were shaking and all of a sudden my whole body was trembling. ¡§ok come lets go sit down we need to tell James and then we can tell them about what you are feeling ok¡¨ We went back to the table and James took it surprisingly well. I saw no judgment in his eyes and I felt relieved. Although as soon as the boys found out that the creep was on the boat they went tense and became very protective. That night I woke with a sudden shake and I just new. I woke Kristy ad we went outside together. There lay Robert and James in a pool of blood. I freaked and next to me Kristy started to shake. ¡§No!¡¨ But as I fell next to their bodies I realized that it was there blood but instead it was that of the man who had hurt me so many years ago. James and rob were just knocked. Relieve flooded my senses and it was all I could do not to shriek in joy. EPILOUGE Two years later Layla and Robert got married and on their second anniversary they had twins named Hailey and Jenny. Layla became a songwriter for their little church and Robert became a FBI agent who later retired at the age of fifty. James and Kristy got married only a year later and had a baby boy named Todd and then had a little girl named Chantal and then had twins named Belle and Matthew. James became a multimillionaire in real estate and Kristy was the instructor at a health and fitness centre. THE END
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