Faeid (4)
Aurora Knight

 


Chapter 8

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious."
Albert Einstein

"You know, Ki'Leana, something is definitely peculiar about you lately. I see you smiling with Teremai, and yet you do not even like him. Was it like that way with me too, I wonder?"

I turned quickly around. I was standing in the garden, and it was near sunset, mind you. The roses and tulips surrounded the stone path I was walking on, and guess who was standing behind me.

Analalai.

Didn�t you hear me? I said, Analalai.

Yeah.

His blond hair was turned gold in the sun, and his golden eyes flared even brighter. He had a sort of lazy expression on his face, and his arms were crossed in front of his chest. He reached out his arm toward the rose bush beside him, lightly touching the petals of a red rose, but his gaze was still fixed on me.

I frowned, and said, "Pardon me?"

He rolled his eyes fatuously, pushing a strand of blonde hair out of his eye. He came closer, placing both of his hands on my shoulders.

Yuck! Icky! Disgusting!

I mean, really, Ki'Leana, couldn't you have had better taste than freaking Analalai?

Analalai's eyes bore into mine. " 'Pardon me?' That's what you say? How very interesting."

I breathed out, trying to understand what exactly was going on. "What exactly did I tell you, Analalai, that makes you speak the way you do?"

Analalai blinked, frowning. "You are getting stranger and stranger, Ki'Leana. Or maybe this whole innocence thing is just another of your acts. You are, after all, the one that acted like you were in love with Teremai just so that you could get into the high keth'enai, and when you did, you were the bitchiest of all bitches to him, and yet you still kept him infatuated with you. Enough so that he proposed to you, the poor fool. He's too damned soft. Then again, he didn't earn his place among the Keth'enai. He was born into it."

I blinked, taking it all in. Oh, so, basically, Ki'Leana�the real one�was a terrible bitch that used men to get to where she wanted to go. Pity.

I quickly regained my posture. Analalai was staring at me strangely. "Or maybe you lied and used me too."

I cleared my throat. "Why would you think that, Analalai?"

He smiled. It wasn't a good smile, you know. It was bitter. On the edge of wickedness. "Because turning men into your little fuck buddies has always been a greater pleasure of yours. I found it interesting, of course, until I had feelings for you."

I laughed then. Okay, it wasn't the actress laughing. It was actually me because that was damned funny. "Analalai," I said, grinning, "you couldn't have feelings for someone if you kissed them two hundred times, and slept with them two thousand times."

Before I could think, let alone blink, his hand swung back, and he hit me right across the face with the back of his fist.

He had actually been the only thing holding me up afterward, but he moved, and I fell onto the stone path.

Allow me to clarify. I'm not strong. I'm really not. I've had vigorous battle training. Enough to make someone bleed through their eyes, and I got some great muscles from it. But I wasn't strong enough to beat even Analalai at arm wrestling. I didn't know if I could beat him at sword fighting, but let's hope that the challenge stood somewhere in the future.

And, really, he had no right to hit me. Analalai seemed like the type to sleep with women, but never love them. And if he did have some type of feelings toward them, it would be possessive. Which was quite obvious now, wasn't it?

I glared at him from on the ground. I could feel my nose bleeding, and I struggled to keep the glamour on. You see, fighting is a lot like kissing. If you get in a fight while wearing a glamour, it's not a good thing because pain is similar in essence to passion�same thing with panic and sadness and sometimes anger. So I tried to ignore the pain, and keep up the glamour.

Analalai was then on the ground next to me, grabbing my arm. Our faces were inches apart, and I was thinking, if he kisses me, I'm going to throw up right now, goddamn it. Without warning.

"I love you, Ki'Leana, don't you see that?" He was saying fiercely.

Stay calm. Stay calm. You'll never get the gist of this or anything else if you get angry. You might loose the glamour if you get distracted. Stay focused. Try not to let the glamour down. Keep it up. Don't loose it.

So I labored my breathing, and said quietly, but firmly, "You don't feel love."

He shook me hard, and I was so dizzy with trying to keep my concentration, that I didn't feel it when he slapped me. I could feel a slight burning sensation, but that was it. I was concentrating too much on keeping up the glamour. But if he hit me one more time, maybe two more times, then that was it. I was going to have to give it up.

See, keeping up a glamour can make you seriously weak. Especially trying to keep it up while feeling something along the lines of what I was feeling.

After he slapped me, my head was turned to one side, my cheek burning. I could hear Analalai's breathing, and my own.

He didn't care to see how much pain I was in though. "I feel love. And I know that I love you."

I placed one of my hands on the walkway, still knowing fully that he was supporting half of my body weight.

I coughed, and looked at him. "You're obsessed with me is what it is. You don't love me."

He looked at me then, his golden eyes burning. "There is no obsession. I love you so damned much that I want to hurt people. And that includes your little boy toy Teremai. No, I don't just want to hurt him, I want to kill him."

Don't cry, dammit, don't cry. If you cry, he'll see a weakness. Don't cry. "Why do you want to kill him?"

"Because seeing him touch you drives me crazy! I can't stand it anymore! You probably knew this was going to happen, didn't you, you bitch?" He pulled at the front of my shirt, and pulled me closer to him. "Didn't you?"

Holy shit, Goddess, please don't let him do anything crazy. Please.

"No," I answered softly. "I didn't know this was going to happen. I swear that I didn't want it to happen."

He made a disgusted sound, and threw me away from him. Literally threw. I landed on my left side, concentrating on keeping up the glamour because I hurt so much. I frowned with concentration, and looked up at Analalai through hazy eyes.

He straightened. "You're so weak, Ki'Leana. Weaker than you thought, in fact. The next time I see Teremai, I might just kill him. If I find out that you have deep-seated feelings for him, I'll make it so that you watch him die. I don't think that you'd like that very much, would you?"

With a last glance at me, he turned, and stalked out of the garden.

I breathed out slowly. Flinching, I braced myself on my arms, and weakly stood up, stumbling slightly, and grabbing the hedges of the bushes to keep me upright, I did this for about five feet until I got to the bench. I lay on it, trying to ignore the pain.

I'd been in plenty of fights, and gotten beat up to a bloody pulp. But never while holding up a glamour. And that made it more difficult.

I concentrated on keeping the glamour, breathing slowly in and out, and eventually just fell asleep.




Chapter 9

Do you believe in fairies? Say quick that you believe. If you believe, clap your hands!
Sir James M. Barrie

Ummm. Oh, that hurt. I want whoever is touching my jaw to stop. It hurts. No, I'm serious. It hurts.

I slowly opened my eyes. Teremai's face entered my field of vision. I was lying with my head in his lap, and he was lightly touching my cheek. Of course, I still didn't know if my glamour was up, but I'm assuming it was because he wasn't freaking out in horror at someone so ugly, so I didn't have to worry.

I didn't know how long I'd been out. But it was night now. All of the stars shimmered brightly, and Teremai was still glowing. His hair lightly flared in a halo around his head, and his eyes were a deep indigo color.

I blinked up at him, and he frowned. "Your cheek is bruised badly, ma kyela," he said.

I sighed and moved my head slightly, so that my cheek was resting lightly against Teremai's muscled thigh. I could feel the heat of his skin even through the black pants that he was wearing.

If I were really myself, I'd heal quicker because I could concentrate more on healing myself than keeping up my glamour because of the pain. But instead I didn't have the focus to do two things at once. Not to mention that it wastes my energy.

"What happened?" he asked softly.

Teremai always spoke softly. He didn't seem the type to get mad. It actually matched his name, which, in elven, meant "compassion". Good choice of names for one who came from a dark elven family.

I breathed out slowly, and murmured, "Analalai."

Gods, it hurt to talk. My jaw really hurt, actually.

I felt like the glamour was fading. I could feel it fading even as I tried to keep it up. And even as Teremai leaned over and kissed me softly.

On the lips.

I was slightly afraid, because I could feel my glamour coming off. I could no longer keep it up, because I was kissing him back.

There was no tongue involved in the kiss. It was a mere touching of lips, and it made me shiver slightly.

Teremai deepened the kiss, driving his tongue between my lips. I brought my head up off his lap, pressing my mouth harder against his, knowing full well that the glamour continued to melt off.

Teremai's eyes were closed though. I brought my arms up around his neck, pressing myself to him.

He made a slight moaning sound, and opened his eyes. Most likely seeing two bright green one's staring back.

His now lavender eyes widened, and he pulled back with a yelp, falling back off the bench on his butt, and looking at me in surprise.

I sighed and grabbed a piece of my hair. It was sky blue again. Great. Grand. Wonderful.

I looked back at Teremai, and he swallowed, his eyes still wide.

"You're�" he swallowed, making a gulping noise.

I closed my eyes and said, "I'm ugly. Go ahead and say it."

Teremai straightened himself so that he was sitting cross-legged in front of me, his eyes still wide with amazement. "I don't understand. You've kept a glamour for all this time, Ki'Leana?"

I looked down, my light blue hair brushing forward. "No. I'm not Ki'Leana. My name is Eressea Glora of the Aratar elves of Ela-Ishtel. I have been glamouring as your Ki'Leana Nis'tai for four days."

I looked at Teremai again. He'd leaned forward in interest. "Why did you glamour as Ki'Leana?"

I wasn't going to do the whole find-out-yourself gig. Teremai deserved to know the truth. Especially since he made me feel the way I did. I don't know yet if my feelings about him are good or bad with what I was trying to accomplish.

"I glamoured to spy on Draelond. To see if any sudden attacks were going to be made against Ela-Ishtel. And also�"

"Because of me."

I turned to my right and there stood Lord Avanthar.







Chapter 10
Light she was and like a fairy,
And her shoes were number nine
Percy Montross (Oh, My Darling Clementine)

The darkness of his clothes and hair melded in with the shadows. Even from here, I could see his dark eyes. And right now they looked like they held every single star in the universe.

Teremai stood up quickly. "My Lord, you know this lady?"

Lord Avanthar ventured five hesitant steps forward, until he was standing two feet from the bench I was sitting on. "Yes. I know Princess Eressea Glora. I asked her to be my consort, which is undoubtedly the reason why she came to spy on me so abruptly."

Teremai looked at me, and then back at Lord Avanthar. Lord Avanthar spoke sharply to him, still looking at me. "Leave now, Teremai. I would like the chance to speak with the princess of Ela-Ishtel in private."

Teremai nodded and quickly left the garden, with one glance back at me.

I lay back on the bench, closing my eyes, and not looking at Lord Avanthar, even though I knew that he'd moved closer, and was now staring down at me.

Without opening my eyes, I asked, "So, are you going to order me to be executed now? Drive a sword through my chest? Laugh while you do it?"

I felt his fingertips brush the bruise on my jaw lightly. I flinched, and opened my eyes. He didn't look like he wanted to kill me. Actually, he looked like he wanted to kiss me. He was frowning slightly, and his look was softened. I'd never seen his look softened before. I mean, he was gorgeous scowling. But this made him look more attractive somehow. His eyes were dark pools of black. Liquid. Unfathomable.

And I didn't feel the least bit like cringing. And that was even more frightening. I frowned, and didn't move. "What do you want from me, Lord Avanthar?"

He kneeled next to the bench I was laying on, and leaned over me, his own frown disappearing and his eyes looked softer, all of his features relaxed. He lightly stroked my hair, but I was still confused, so I kept my frown.

"You want to know what I want from you, Eressea?" He asked. "All I seem to want right now is you."

"Why?"

"Because you're so beautiful, and I find myself wanting you even though I shouldn�t."

"I am not."

"Yes, you are, Princess Eressea. More beautiful than you can think and more so than you can imagine."

I blinked, my eyes wide, as his lips lightly touched mine. They were warm above my own, and Lord Avanthar wasn't even deepening the kiss. It was more like a lingering that sent shivers all up and down my body.

When he pulled up, I started, "Lord Avanthar�"

He put a finger on my lips. "No more of this 'Lord Avanthar'. Call me Avanthar, Eressea."

It was then that I'd remembered his plan. Oh, yeah. I'd temporarily forgotten with that splendid kiss, all right? Not my fault. "What then? When I marry you will you kill me? Are you trying to woo me so I'll say yes?"

He blinked. "Where did you get that idea?"

"I heard the conversation you had with Analalai this morning."

Lord�err�I mean, Avanthar, groaned slightly, bending his head. "What was I supposed to tell him? That I was in love with you?"

I blinked rapidly. Did he say�did he�um�say�that? Like love? Or did he say loathe? I'm not sure that I heard right. I couldn't have heard right. That's not�possible. Is it possible? Am I going crazy? Like, literally crazy?

"Did you say�?" I started.

He looked away, seeming to concentrate on the roses behind me. Not saying anything. Both of us were both silent for a moment. Finally, Avanthar broke the silence abruptly, not looking at me. "I love you, Eressea."

I frowned waiting for the words 'I love you' to register. But they seemed to be bouncing off my brain. Hearing Avanthar say those words seemed inconceivable four days ago. But compared to Analalai, or at least what I'd seen of him, Avanthar seemed like a playful puppy to me.

I finally managed to say something. "Look at me and say it. Look at my eyes."

Avanthar looked a moment more away from me, and very slowly met my gaze. His eyes seemed tender now. If a bit frustrated. Not that I blame him, mind you. He had a right to be frustrated. Hard to please? Who? Me?

Avanthar reached out with his right hand, and lightly touched my left cheek. I kept my gaze steadily on him, eyes not moving. He did the same.

"I love you, Princess Eressea Glora."

"How? You don't know me enough."

His thumb moved lightly along my jaw line. When it touched my bruise, I tried not to flinch again. "I've watched you, Eressea. Watched you fight, watched you smile, and laugh and talk. Even from afar I couldn't help but fall in love with you."

"But we're so�different."

Avanthar's expression didn't change at all. He didn't take offense to it. Thank you, Avanthar. "We are. And I think that's part of the reason why I want you."

"Because we're different?"

"Yes."

"Can't differences create problems?"

He stilled. Oh, Eressea, you're ruining the mood, you know.

"Anything can create problems, Eressea. You just have to be able to get through them. Marry me."

My eyes widened. And this time, when he asked me, I didn't feel like screaming. I don't know yet if I wanted to say yes, but just looking at him made me not think a definite no.

"Avanthar, I�"

And there we go again. I was unable to finish because I couldn't exactly speak, you know?

Avanthar leaned down and kissed me again, this time harder than the last one. I brought my arms up and gripped his shoulders lightly. He put his arms around my waist, lightly raising me up from the bench to deepen the kiss. I could feel his own tongue touching mine, and we continued to kiss even as he pulled me into a sitting position. My eyes were closed even when he broke off the kiss. I was still clutching his shoulders, but his hands were tight around my waist, pressing me hard to him.

I finally opened my eyes, and Avanthar still had that soft expression on his face.

"Marry me," he murmured, kissing my forehead lightly. "Marry me."

I wanted to. Lord Avanthar�according to reputation�was devious, but I doubt he was devious enough to tell someone that he loved him or her and not mean it. It's a little difficult to even lie when those three little words are being used.

Gods, I can't marry him. I just can't. I'm not ready for marriage. With all the fighting I do, it wouldn't work. I don't have time to be a wife or raise kids when I have any.

I looked him in the eyes. And then I closed my eyes, looking away. "I can't. I'm sorry, I just can't."

I didn't wait to see his expression, but I pushed him out of the way, and stood up, stumbling slightly because of the wave of dizziness that hit me so suddenly.

I grabbed a hold of the side of the bench, closing my eyes. I was grateful that Avanthar didn't move to support me. Mostly because I didn't want any help. I'm not a damsel in distress, you know.

I looked up at him, and he frowned slightly. He didn't seem at all angry, just confused. "Why, Eressea? You were kissing me back. You felt something. Admit it."

I met his gaze calmly. "I felt something. But I can't marry you."

His frown deepened. "Why ever not?"

I shook my head. "Because I'm not ready to. I can't be a wife and be a protector of my kingdom at the same time."

Avanthar took a hesitant step toward me. "You can try. We can both try."

I took my hold off the bench, and stood on my own. "No. Not now. Please, Avanthar, don't tell anyone about me being here. I'll leave in the morning."

He nodded, but he still looked confused. "Put your glamour back on, Eressea. I won't tell anyone you've been here."

I closed my eyes tightly, imagining myself becoming Ki' Leana again, I didn't have the girl to touch this time, so everything had to be directly from memory. Not difficult, but difficult enough.

When I opened my eyes again, I looked to Avanthar for confirmation.

"It looks perfect, Eressea."

"Thank you."

I turned to leave, and Avanthar called my name. I turned back slowly. He looked calm. Strangely calm. I know that he was frustrated though. I think that was beginning to be a new emotion for Avanthar. Frustration, I mean.

"Leave in the morning. But will you at least think about my proposal?"

I looked at him a moment more. Four days ago, I wouldn't have even considered saying yes. When I thought about Avanthar four days ago, the first thing that would have jumped into my mind was 'ewwwww!!' or something like that. But I could see myself marrying him if I said yes. I couldn't see myself cringing at all.

So, I nodded. "I'll think about it, Avanthar."

I turned and walked away before he could say anything.

I went directly to my room, and sat on my bed, biting my fingernail. This wasn't a good thing. When I bit on my fingernail, I knew I was frustrated.

Did I love Avanthar? Not yet. Did I love Teremai? It was damned well getting there. But after tonight, I didn't know if Teremai would even speak to me. But I couldn't help the way I felt about him. Especially since I'd never really had anyone act toward me the way he did.

But it upset me that he wouldn't feel the same way. He was in love with Ki' Leana. Not me.

That was before he came bursting into my room at two o' clock in the morning.

 

 

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