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TITLE (EDIT)
These Are The Good Old Days We Shall Be Longing For A Few Years From Now |
DESCRIPTION
Youth is the time of happiness,crazy love and endless parties.Younngsters don't burn there heads with a question 'Is the glass half full or half empty'.Their glass of life is always full...
[780 words] |
TITLE KEYWORD
Motivational |
AUTHOR
Kravtsova |
These Are The Good Old Days We Shall Be Longing For A Few Years From Now
Kravtsova
You wake up in the morning,wash up,eat your breakfast,which is always the same,and go to work.Everything happens again but you realize that something new is knocking on your door.You cannot recognize it yet but ubderstand that it is something you can miss.You analyze your behaviour,the manners of people you associate with and cannot find out what exactly is happening to you....Do you remember yourself at the age of 5,10,15?Can you describe that you felt,what you thought?Surely,you can:5years of age:curious about everything interesting for others,10-a new state with new responsibilities and duties at school-maths is getting hard to understand,willingness to look the preetiest girl in the class;15-crazy love which is always forever,ugly spots on your face ,makeup,willingness to dye your hair in order to be special,unusual,just different... The thing which is always knocking on your door is nothing but your age.Pessimists say that yesterday was better than today.You might agree with it:yesterday you looked better,felt better.Today it is hrder to find the size of shoes you wanted to by yesterday....Am I ONE OF THESE PESSIMISTS?Now I am.Today they say I look better than I looked when I was 20.It flatters me but...I hardly believe them.The reason is my being 30.I cannot say I am unhappy today,not at all!I am hesitated.I am different.I have never witnessed this age,never noticed it.Now I do!You might think I suffer from some phobia.Believe me I don't!I don't notice it at all,but.... Hve you noticed that when we try to comment something or express our opinion,we often use this conjunction 'BUT'.Here it is.But I regret that I haven't done many things I could have done when I was 20. At university I wanted to be better but I was shy enough to respond at lessons I was ready for.In informal conversations with boys I was very modest or proud.They were afraid to talk to me first.I did never try to speak to them first,but I expected their intiative.It happened very rarely.Although It had panned I wasn't interested in those guys.I thought it wasn't time yet. My first year at work was very painstaking.I was 22 then and wanted to look older and successful.I wanted my students to respect me.I managed with it-they did respect me.I used to be a very strict teacher.Perhaps one should be so.Today I understand it was right to behave this way.Then I understood I was doing something wrong.I had two persons inside.One of them wanted to be strict and proud,the other one wanted to be permissive and easy-going.The two ones fought a lot.The first always won.I don't know if it was the influence of my university teachers,I cannot explain it thoroughly.But I know that I was right to be strict..Being 22 I thought it was very early to have a child and I was afraid of pregnancy.I thought having a child wouldn't allow me to continue my career.Now I realize I was very wrong.I wish I had had a child when I was 22.I gave birth to my son being 26.That time I was ready for it.So was my husband.We took care of our boy and were happy.One year I stayed at home with our son.I was happy.I could observe my baby's first word,step and tooth.I remember his smiles and tears and it makes me happier.But I had to continue my work.You cannot imagine how bad I felt then:all my working day I thought about my son-what he ate,how he slept.I felt my fault.Nobody blamed me for being a bad motherexcept for myself.I blamed myself for it.I couldn't go to any place I wanted.No theatres,no museums,exhibitions.I couldn't leave my kid without me.When there waas an amergency call I had to do .I always felt my fault.I do understand it was wrong but I can't help doing in a different way.Even now when my son is 7 I still have this feeling.Unconciously,of course.When my students discussed the problem of career and family I taught them it was possible to combine both.I was so persuasive that they believed me.Theoretically it is possible,practically-not...We always miss something we could have done but never tried.We miss our young age.We make up if-stories.Later we understand we have missed some part of our life. They say whatever happens,whenever happens,we must live in our memories.But we do!the old think that at thir time the life was better and amusung.Why do you think they believe it?The answer is very simple:THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN THEIR 75 AND 80.tHEY REMEMBER THE TIME THEY WERE 20 AND 40.When we are 20 we don't notice the things the old do.We are happy enough.We think that our glass is half-full and still have time to fill it with great events in order to say'Our life was better...'.
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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2007 Kravtsova |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
October 2007 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
474
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