Sister
The continuous melodies of the crickets and toads announced the arrival of sunshine and morning. I was strolling along the stream, watching as the clear crystal waters moved gently down the uneven rocks beneath. I came to a halt when I reached to a big willow tree. There it stood, as strong and firm as it has ever been, would easily let people thought that things never changed and time never passed. I pressed my cheeks against the rough surface of the trunk and felt the tree’s age, its peeling bark and wide circumference of the trunk. From the corner of my eyes, I spotted it, as familiar as ever. The carvings. “ Karen! What are you doing!” I shrieked as I saw my older sister holding a knife. “ Come Lizzie, I’ve thought of something fun!” Karen exclaimed delightedly as she pulled me towards the stream near our little cottage. “ Mama would reprimand us if she knew we had the knife!” I stammered. “ Nah…she won’t know about it. Here we are!” Karen pointed towards an old willow tree. “ I don’t understand…” I shook my head in confusion. Karen did not say anything but just grinned and started scraping pieces of wood out of that tree as I watched in amusement. Though Karen is five years older than me, she never minded my childishness and she did not behave like other older girls that I’ve met. She never minded her shabby looks and although the many times Mama used to scream at her to behave more ladylike, she just grinned her way through. Karen is fun, a nice sister and my best friend. I loved her. After all the perspiration till to the heat of the sun, Karen finally flaunted her creation proudly to me. I looked closely to the trunk and I read what she carved, I was overwhelmed. “ Karen and Elizabeth. Best friends and sisters forever.” I read out loud the words that Karen had carved on the tree and smiled at the two girls that she had also carved. “ You like it? The shorter girl with two beautiful pleats is of course you Lizzie and the taller one with untamed hair is me,” Karen patted my head, making me feel proud to have her as my sister. The carvings…they are still there on the old willow tree however Karen was no longer with us. A few years back, war had taken her away from us. The bomb raids had separated us while seeking shelter. Papa and Mama had tried their very best to find Karen but to no avail. Many concluded that she was already dead from the war but I refused to believe, neither did Mama. Mama had spent all these ten years weeping for Karen and was very sickly. It broke my heart to see Mama like this and I was some kind of envious of Karen that she got all Mama’s attention which Mama had hardly given me all these time. Carefully, I strode back to the cottage and met a fine lady in her early twenties. “Lizzie!” That lady gave out a small gasp. She knew my name. Who was she? She was a brunette like I was, dancing shimmering greenish grey eyes and remarkably fine features. I thought I was having a dream but no doubt she was… “ It’s me, Karen! Lizzie, I miss you!” Karen lounged and hugged me. “ I miss you too…where have you been…” My eyes welled up with tears filled with joy. “ I’ll explain later…I can’t wait to see Mama and Papa!” Karen wiped off my tears as we walked towards the cottage together. I pushed the wooden door opened and saw Mama cleaning the table, “ Mama, see who’s here!” Mama raised her head, gasped and stared at Karen with big round eyes. “ Is that…you? Ka..ren?” Mama stammered nervously. Karen nodded her head as she went forward and hugged Mama, “ Yes of course, I am your Karen, Mama.” “ I am not dreaming, am I?” Mama dropped her cloth and hugged Karen back tightly. “ No, you’re not…Mama…I am your daughter, your child Karen Sophie Andersen…and I am back,” Karen smiled fondly. In the evening when Papa returns from work, it was another great scene. During the whole day, Mama never left Karen for a moment. She pampered Karen and kept looking at her as though she must remember every moles and pores on Karen’s face before she ever go missing again. Mama was totally unaware of my presence. It hurt me and my heart had fury and jealousy of Karen growing. I comforted myself umpteen times that Mama would feel the same if I were the one who went missing but the console did not last forever. Karen explained to us during dinner that she was badly injured by one of the bomb raids but she somehow managed to escape death. A couple took her in and sent her for treatment. The kind couple also fostered her as their own although they had a son. However she lost her memory only until recently had the memories flashed back to her. She began to remember everything and wanted to find us. She was worried if we had moved away. “ Anyway welcome home Karen,” Papa patted her shoulders. “ I will only be staying here a few days…” Karen broke the news. “ Why!” My mother exclaimed in shock. “ Because…I am married,” Karen smiled. “ To whom?” Papa inquired. “ To my foster parents’ son, the Denson family…” Karen smiled blissfully and I felt a dagger stabbed into my heart. I did not understand why Karen had all the luck and good things bestowed to her. I had always behaved in the most lady liked manner, did my sewing well and nothing that I could learn was inferior to Karen. Why a girl, who always breaks the rules, dress shabbily, bad manners, could have joy and happiness while I…almost failed in everything? I did not understand and my jealousy for Karen increased. The few days after Karen returned home, I was living in emotional spiritual hell. Maybe it was not even Karen’s fault but I just could not stop blaming her. During the years when she had gone, all Mama’s attention was on finding, looking for her and thinking of her and I used to wish that Karen would come back to us so that Mama would not behave this way anymore. However somehow beneath the joy that Karen had returned, I secretly wished she was never home. Mama had now given even more obvious attention and biasness towards Karen and I felt even more dejected than before. Deep inside me, I struggling hard for the feelings I felt towards Karen. I had always respected her and loved her and although now she had done nothing for me to lose that admiration for her, I was badly jealous of her. I wanted so much to hate her but she had given me no reason to but I had shown it through my attitude towards her. I scowled whenever Mama praised her, thinking that I was not poorer and I had kept my distance from Karen. I gave her cold shoulders and was extremely hostile and sarcastic. I was not myself anymore but a young lady filled with jealously. I took my usual stroll past that stream behind the cottage one morning and when I reached near that willow tree, I spotted Karen touching and smiling at the trunk. Our eyes met and I turned away. “Wait!” Karen hurried behind me and she grabbed my right arm. “ What is it,” I looked into her twinkling eyes with burning fury. Karen’s greenish grey eyes were filled with softness of spring and warmth like wool. Her eyes looked at me with love and adore which soothed my heart. I felt being mocked at. She was like a goddess of love while I was like a stupid fool blinded by hatred. “ Do you remember that?” Karen shoved me towards the old willow tree. I glanced at the carvings and nodded slowly. “ You know, I really meant it…” Karen said softly. Now, I felt even worst than before. I was guilty that I even tried hating Karen just because she had got the attention that I want from Mama. I did not even dare to look into her eyes. I thought I might just melt away. I had treated her so badly yet she had never lessen the softness in her. “ I love you, Sister…but I hate you too…you know?” I broke down crying and I turned away my face as not let her see my face. Karen moved towards me and hugged me, “ Stupid girl…just because Mama put more attention to me nowadays? If you are the one who had gone missing, I would bet a million that she would be even more into you…” “ Really…?” I choked on my tears. “ Uh huh of course! I would not lie to you. You cannot hate me, you know? Because I am your sister and best friend,” Karen reminded me the fact that I had almost forgotten. “ Karen…I am sorry…I will not hate you anymore…” I felt like a child saying this. “ I believe in you…” Karen stroked my head, “ Let’s go…Mama’s waiting for us…” I nodded and we walked off hand in hand leaving the old willow tree, which bears the carvings of two grinning young girls and the most factual thing in my life. “Karen and Elizabeth. Best friends and sisters forever.”
Copyright © 2002 Cass |