Temple U (1) Temple U By William Wright FADE IN: White words: On November 22, 2004, shock rocker Marilyn Manson surprised an unsuspecting class of students at Temple University in Philadelphia when he became the professor of an Art and Society class for the day, as part of MTV's "Stand-In" series. MtvU is MTV's 24-hour college network, reaching over 700 campuses across the country. In this version, Manson is a storyteller. Temple U is his story. CUT TO: INT. ROOM - DAY Close up - a mirror face-up on a table. On the mirror is a picture of an American flag; only the white stripes are made of a powdery substance. Scratched above the flag is the title, "Temple U." As "The Star-spangled Banner" plays, a straw comes into view. We hear an occasional sniffing sound, as the white powder from a stripe is sucked through the straw. After a few lines have been sniffed away, we move from the mirror to a black leather bag. The hand of MARILYN MANSON - white with black nail polish - grabs the bag, taking it out of view. The music, and the scene, ends with the sound of a door being slammed shut. CUT TO BLACK. GOD breaks the silence. GOD (O.S.) Open your eyes. FADE IN: EXT. GARDEN - DAY The wondrous Garden of Eden. A naked man on the ground sits up. He is ADAM (20's). Adam looks around. ADAM Who said that? Unseen, God answers. (God will remain unseen, and therefore off-screen, for the duration of the film.) GOD I am God. I created you. Your name is Adam. ADAM Where are you? 2. GOD I choose not to be seen. ADAM What do you look like? GOD That's not important. What is important is that you know I love you and always want what's best for you. ADAM OK... GOD I know you have more questions. Ask me anything. Adam thinks, gazing out at the garden. ADAM Did you create all this too? GOD Yes, I did. I made it for you. Do you like it? ADAM Yes I do, very much so - thank you...so who created you? GOD No one created me. I've always existed. ADAM But how can that be? GOD I know your understanding is limited, but trust me it's true. Anything else? Thinking some more, Adam looks down, discovering his penis. He points to it. ADAM What's this thing do? GOD Nevermind that. How about some fruit? Adam, undeterred, grabs his penis. ADAM I like it. 3. FADE TO BLACK. CUT IN: INT. HOUSE - BEDROOM - DAY Modern day, somewhere in America. A close-up of a woman's beautiful face, looking right at us. She is TAMMY (30's). It is clear she is having sex - enjoyable sex. CUT TO: Husband JIM (30's) and Tammy in bed, relaxing. TAMMY That was good. JIM It's been awhile. TAMMY Almost two weeks. JIM Wow... TAMMY I miss it. JIM I know, me too. TAMMY Don't go in today. Jim laughs as Tammy comes in for a kiss. A sudden yelling and crying in the background stops the couple in their tracks. Tammy groans, dropping her head on Jim's shoulder. Jim smiles and shakes his head. CUT TO: INT. HOUSE - CHILDREN'S BEDROOM - DAY In their bedroom, seven-year-old LORENA is fighting with her four-year-old brother GEORGE over a toy. Jim walks in. JIM All right, stop it, both of you. The kids stop, although both are still holding the toy. JIM (CONT'D) What's going on? 4. LORENA Daddy, it's my toy! You gave it to me! GEORGE It's my toy! Jim looks quietly at his kids for a bit, then turns to Lorena. JIM Who was playing with it first? LORENA George...but it's my toy. GEORGE It's my toy. LORENA It's not your toy! JIM All right, all right!...Lorena, why don't you want George playing with your toy? LORENA He'll mess it up. GEORGE Will not. LORENA Will too! GEORGE Will not! JIM Stop! Now George, you have to be very careful with Lorena's toys, OK? You wouldn't want her messing up your toys. GEORGE OK. JIM I'm serious, George. GEORGE I know. JIM Lorena, what if he's careful with it? Lorena thinks about it. 5. JIM (CONT'D) George, did you ask your sister if you could play with her toy? GEORGE Yes. LORENA You did not! GEORGE Did too! LORENA Did not! JIM Stop it! OK George, ask Lorena if you can play with her toy. George turns to Lorena. GEORGE Can I play with your toy? LORENA ...OK. JIM That's nice, Lorena. George, why don't you tell Lorena thank you? GEORGE Thank you. Lorena lets go of the toy and smiles at her brother. LORENA You're welcome. JIM Why don't you give each other a good morning hug? Brother and sister give each other a good morning hug. JIM (CONT'D) Now that's what I like to see. From the other room, they hear Mom calling the family to breakfast. Lorena turns excitedly to her little brother. LORENA Race you! George drops the toy and races his big sister out of the room, toward the breakfast table. Standing alone, Jim looks at the toy and smiles. 6. He puts the toy in the toy box and leaves. CUT TO: INT. HOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY The family is in the kitchen, eating breakfast. JIM So is everything fine with your homework, Lorena? LORENA No. Mommy didn't check it. TAMMY Yes, I did. I checked it last night. LORENA You were watching TV. TAMMY I can watch TV and check your homework at the same time. LORENA You hardly even looked at it. JIM Lorena, that's enough. LORENA After she gave it back to me, I found one of my own problems that I missed. Why didn't she catch it? TAMMY I can't catch everything, Lorena. LORENA You're not a good checker, Mommy. GEORGE I like checkers. JIM Lorena, talk nice to your mother. LORENA You never missed a problem, Daddy. Not once. JIM Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. TAMMY I'll try to do a better job tonight, Lorena. 7. Lorena doesn't respond. TAMMY (CONT'D) I will! LORENA OK... JIM That's better. LORENA When are you coming home, Daddy? JIM I should be getting off at seven, which would give me time for a walk with you and George if you want. GEORGE Yes! LORENA Can Mommy go? JIM If she wants. TAMMY Oh, no thanks. GEORGE Come on, Mommy. TAMMY I'd rather just stay inside. JIM It's OK, we'll have a little Daddy time. Lorena holds out her pinkie. LORENA Pinky promise Daddy, you'll come home as soon as you can. JIM Lorena, you know I'm not a big fan of pinky promises. LORENA Please, Daddy? Daddy pauses, then gives in, extending his own pinky. The two curl their pinkies around each other, then pull them apart. 8. JIM Pinky promise. LORENA Thanks, Daddy. Jim stretches out his arms, and Lorena comes in for a long hug. JIM You're a good girl. I'm proud of you. LORENA I love you, Daddy. GEORGE Mommy! George hops out of his chair, into his mother's arms. They all just hug for a minute. Jim smiles at Tammy, and she smiles back. FADE TO BLACK. FADE IN: EXT. GARDEN - DAY Eden - a different area of the garden, where there is a large stone set beside a lovely fruit tree, the Tree of Knowledge. In the tree is a large snake, referred to as a SERPENT. Adam is sitting on the stone and talking with God. GOD I live here with you, but I also live in a place called heaven. ADAM At the same time? GOD At the same time. ADAM How can you live in two places at once? GOD I can do anything I want - I'm God. In fact, I'm everywhere at the same time, except a place called hell that you don't need to concern yourself about. ADAM Do you have anyone in heaven that you're close to? 9. GOD I am with my son Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I am talking to them now, even as I am talking to you. ADAM Why can't I hear them? GOD I prefer it that way. ADAM Who are you closest to? GOD I'm very close to all of you. ADAM I'm glad we're close, God. GOD ...You are my most magnificent creation, a flesh and blood human being. I am proud of you, and I love you. ADAM I love you too. GOD Thank you...Adam, I want to talk to you about that tree you're sitting beside. ADAM It's beautiful. GOD It's also deadly. ADAM What's that mean? GOD Pick up the mouse by your foot. Adam looks down, sees a mouse and picks it up. It just lays there, unmoving, in his hand. ADAM Why doesn't it wake up? GOD That mouse is dead. It will never live again. Adam slowly sets the mouse back down. 10. GOD (CONT'D) If you eat the fruit of that tree, you will die just like that mouse. ADAM I don't understand. If the fruit is so bad for me, why did you create it? GOD I want to know if you will obey me. To be worthy of me, you must obey me. ADAM You're starting to scare me. GOD Just follow the rule and you'll have nothing to worry about. Oh, and watch out for that serpent. He can talk, and he may try to get you to eat the fruit. Don't listen to him, whatever you do. ADAM Why isn't he talking now? GOD He talks when he wants to talk. ADAM And you created him too? GOD Yes, I did. Now what's the rule about the fruit of that tree? ADAM Don't eat it. GOD What happens if you do eat it? ADAM Something bad will happen. GOD Such as? ADAM ...I'll die. 11. FADE TO BLACK. FADE IN: EXT. GARDEN - DAY Adam lazily tosses some pebbles into a lake. He looks as if he's sitting alone. But of course, he isn't. GOD You've been so quiet lately. ADAM I guess I have. GOD Is everything all right? Adam sighs. ADAM I don't know, God...I'm just trying to make sense of things. GOD It's all very simple, really. I created you, and I love you. ADAM I love you too. I just don't understand you. GOD You understand everything you need to understand. ADAM You can do anything, right? GOD Right. ADAM Then appear before me as another human. GOD Adam... ADAM It would mean so much to me God, just being able to see who I'm talking to. Won't you at least consider it? GOD What if I created a human for you instead? 12. ADAM ...You mean like a companion? GOD If that's what you want. Adam smiles. ADAM Oh, yes. Thank you, God. GOD ...Adam, I want you to know that I'll always love you, even if it doesn't always seem that way. ADAM You're very good to me. Nothing will change my feelings for you. GOD I'll remember you said that...behold, Steve. An explosive ball of smoke surprises Adam, and he springs to attention. When the smoke clears, he sees before him another naked man, STEVE (20's). The men give each other the once over, and both are pleased. ADAM Hi, Steve. I'm Adam. STEVE Hi. ADAM So...what's up? STEVE Not much. GOD Adam, perhaps you'd like to give Steve a tour of the garden. Steve looks around. STEVE Who said that? Adam laughs. ADAM Would you like to go for a walk? STEVE Sure. 13. Adam and Steve start walking. ADAM I've got so much to tell you. FADE TO BLACK. CUT IN: INT. CAR DEALERSHIP - CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY America - morning sales meeting. Donuts are passed among a sales staff of about twenty sitting at rows of tables. Some of the staff is relaxed, joking with each other, while others, including Jim, are more reserved. From the back door of the room enter the managers, who line up silently along the back wall. One MANAGER, a fiery young man, greets the men as he walks quickly past them to the far side of the room. MANAGER Good morning. The sales staff turns toward him and responds in unison. SALES STAFF Good morning. The manager stands before a white board. The board contains a chart with a list of names, each one followed by red and blue X's. The manager takes out his markers and calls the first name. MANAGER Doug. DOUG One used. The group applauds as the manager makes a red X at the end of Doug's line of X's. He calls the next name. MANAGER Chris. CHRIS One new, half used. More applause as the manager makes a blue X and the back slash of a red X at the end of Chris's line, which is considerably longer than many of the others. MANAGER Mike. MIKE Good morning. 14. No applause. The manager continues to the next name, and the next and the next until all the names have been called. The manager then goes to the front of the room, behind a podium. The men turn to the front, so that they continue to face him. MANAGER All right, overall car sales aren't bad. We can certainly do better, but traffic has been a little slow lately. Mike? MIKE Yes? MANAGER You're fired. Dead silence. Mike is stunned, staring blankly into space. MANAGER (CONT'D) Go to the receptionist. She'll have everything you need. Please close the door behind you. MIKE But... MANAGER Thank you, Mike. Defeated, Mike stands, heads toward the door and leaves, closing the door behind him. A short, tense silence. MANAGER (CONT'D) Mike's a nice guy; I don't have anything personally against him. But when business is slow, I don't need as many salesmen here. Understand? Scattered nods. MANAGER (CONT'D) All right - now as you know, we're having a tent sale next weekend. Bell to bell, guys. Long days, but the opportunity for a shitload of deals. This afternoon, we will post the names of those going to the tent sale and those staying here. Make sure you're where you need to be right at eight o'clock next Friday morning, no exceptions. As for this weekend, don't slack off. We do get traffic on Easter, and I want results. Last Easter, sales sucked. (MORE) 15. MANAGER (CONT'D) You newer guys can ask the others how the Monday meeting went. I'm sure they remember. The manager smiles. MANAGER (CONT'D) Let's make some serious cash, gentlemen. Isn't that why you're here? Do it for yourselves, do it for your families. Live the life you deserve. CUT TO: EXT. CAR DEALERSHIP - LOT - DAY Jim with his friend, fellow car salesman DAN (30's), standing amongst the cars at the dealership. JIM I still think it was a mistake. DAN That Saddam Hussein is no longer in power? JIM That we went to war when we didn't need to. DAN The guy was killing his own people, Jim. He needed to be taken out. JIM He was no threat to us. Sure, he was a bad leader. The world is full of bad leaders. That alone doesn't justify going to war. DAN So screw the Iraqi people. It's their problem, let them deal with it. JIM It was an unnecessary war, Dan. That's all I'm saying. The men pause, as a car pulls into view. JIM (CONT'D) That one's yours. Dan leaves quickly, smiling at Jim as he heads in the direction of the car. 16. DAN I'm not done with you. Jim smiles back. JIM Didn't think you were. CUT TO: INT. HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT Jim walks in after a long day at work. Tammy is on the couch, reading. She puts her reading down as Jim sits beside her. TAMMY How was your day? JIM Don't ask. TAMMY ...Lorena cried herself to sleep. There was no comforting her. JIM I got here as soon as I could, but I had a customer. TAMMY I know...honey, you don't have to work there, you know. I mean, if you don't want to, I understand. JIM Thanks Tammy, but I just...it just wasn't enough. We didn't have enough money. TAMMY We were OK. You were making $18 an hour in construction. That's enough. You said they'd take you back if you wanted. JIM The hours were great - off by three, home by three-thirty. TAMMY The rest of the day to spend with us. JIM I know...I just want more for us, that's all. I'm tired of just getting by. 17. Jim pauses, then smiles. JIM (CONT'D) You know what I want? TAMMY What? JIM I want to take a family vacation. Tammy smiles too. TAMMY Really? JIM Yeah, and I'm not talking about just taking a few days off to hang around the house, either. I mean a real vacation, where we go someplace nice, someplace special. TAMMY We've never really had a vacation like that. JIM I know. TAMMY Where would you like to go? JIM You first. Tammy thinks for a minute. TAMMY I've always loved Paris...or maybe Venice, riding the gondolas. Or Rome - god, there's so much to see. JIM I was thinking more like Disney World. Someplace fun for the kids. TAMMY Yeah, I like Disney World too...what about Hawaii? Jim thinks, then nods. JIM Hawaii sounds good. We could all play at the beach. 18. TAMMY And you and I could get laid. Jim chuckles. JIM Hawaii, then. TAMMY Aloha. Jim pauses, coming down, back to the real world. JIM So are you taking the kids to your grandma and grandpa's for Easter? TAMMY Yeah, they'll enjoy it. I wish you could come. Just about everyone else will be there. JIM I would if I could. TAMMY It's OK. JIM I better clean up. Jim stands and starts to walk away when he hears crying. Lorena walks in, wearing a nightgown and rubbing her eyes. JIM (CONT'D) Honey, what's wrong? LORENA Where were you? JIM Working. I got home as soon as I could. LORENA No, you didn't. You came home late after you pinky promised. JIM Lorena...listen, why don't we just go for a walk now? TAMMY Now? It's late. JIM Oh, we'll be fine. A short walk. 19. TAMMY Five minutes. JIM (to Lorena) Would you still like to go for a walk? Lorena pauses, then nods. CUT TO: EXT. SIDEWALK - NIGHT Lorena, still in her night clothes, and her dad are walking hand-in-hand. JIM So how was school? LORENA Pretty good. JIM Yeah? LORENA Yeah, we had extra art time today. JIM Really, why's that? Lorena shrugs. LORENA I made a picture for you. It's on the refrigerator door. JIM Thank you, honey. I can't wait to see it. LORENA It's our house, with flowers and birds and a rainbow. You, me, Mommy and George are standing in front of it. JIM Sounds like a wonderful picture. You're quite the artist. LORENA I'm even better at reading. JIM Oh, I know. 20. LORENA Mrs. Hiller says if I finish just three more books, I'll move up to red group. Only two other kids are in that group. JIM Awesome. LORENA But you know, something else happened. JIM Nothing terrible, I hope. LORENA At recess, a boy tried to push me off the merry-go-round. He was mean. JIM Did you tell the teacher? LORENA Yes. JIM Good girl. LORENA He had to sit down for the rest of recess. JIM Good. You don't have to take that kind of stuff from anyone. LORENA He's big and seems kind of dumb. JIM Not everyone can be as smart as you. LORENA Especially boys. Jim chuckles. JIM Try to be nice to him, though. LORENA He calls everyone Holmes. He even called me Holmes. JIM I see. 21. LORENA Daddy, what's a Holmes? JIM A Holmes? Jim pauses, unsure how to respond. JIM (CONT'D) OK...well, Holmes was the name of an actor. LORENA Like Katie Holmes? JIM Not exactly, no...Johnny Holmes was in movies with lots of funky monkey. Lorena is shocked. She lets go of Jim's hand, covers her ears and walks quickly ahead of him. LORENA (loudly, over and over) La la la la... Jim stops. JIM Lorena, that's enough! Lorena stops and turns back to her father. LORENA Talk about something else. JIM I was only answering your question. LORENA I don't care. JIM What do you want to talk about? Lorena pauses, thinks for a moment then retakes Jim's hand. They continue walking. LORENA I've been practicing on the monkey bars at school, and now I can get all the way across. JIM Really? Good job. 22. LORENA I wish I could show you. JIM I'd like to see it. LORENA We could go to the park. It's only a couple blocks away. JIM Lorena...we're already late. LORENA Please, Daddy? Jim looks down at Lorena, as she looks up with the mock sadness of a clown. Daddy is swayed. JIM Your mother's gonna kill me. Fake sadness into very real joy. LORENA Yay! JIM We'll need to hurry. LORENA Let's run! Laughing, father and daughter start running. LORENA (CONT'D) I'm so good on the monkey bars, Daddy. You're not gonna believe it! FADE TO BLACK. FADE IN: EXT. CAR DEALERSHIP - LOT - DAY Jim and Dan back at the car dealership, standing in the lot. DAN So what do you do when you're not here? Jim chuckles cynically. JIM Not here? Why should I not be here? I'm committed to this place. 23. DAN You're a credit to the company. JIM That means a lot...I don't know, mainly I just hang out with my family. DAN Family guy, good for you. JIM What about you? DAN Me? Well, I'm not exactly the family type. Tried it a couple times, just didn't work out. JIM Got a girlfriend? DAN Nothing serious. Pretty much just dating around right now. JIM You know, that's something I never really got to do. DAN It's great - I mean, I'll be totally honest. Being with whoever you want whenever you want, not having to answer to anybody. JIM Sounds good. DAN You know, I have a theory about men and women. It goes back to prehistoric man. JIM Let's have it. DAN All right, at that time mankind had to increase its population, to help keep it from going extinct. So men were wired to fuck everything that moved, to impregnate as many women as possible. Women, on the other hand, had to actually take care of the children, which was very difficult to do without a man around. See what I'm saying? 24. JIM I think so. DAN What I'm saying is that men are naturally polygamous and women are naturally monogamous. I mean let's face it, weddings are for the bride, not the groom. JIM Interesting...I don't know, I am a little bored, I guess. Not that I don't love my wife and kids, but I just get tired of the same routine. Sometimes I want to do something different, you know? Something unexpected. DAN I hear ya'. You're pretty cool, Jim. I can tell there's more to you than meets the eye. JIM Thanks. DAN Why don't we go get a beer after work? JIM I don't know... DAN Come on! You just said you were tired of the routine - so break it. JIM ...One drink. DAN Good man. Pause, as the men turn their attention to a woman walking by on the sidewalk. Dan waits until the woman is safely out of earshot. DAN (CONT'D) She's a whore. JIM Really? DAN Yeah. (MORE) 25. DAN (CONT'D) The other night on the way home, I came to a stop sign and she walked past me. She wasn't wearing much, and of course I'm gonna look. Who wouldn't? JIM Of course. DAN So she's walking away, but then she stops. She turns around and looks right at me. You could tell by her face what she wanted. JIM So what did you do? DAN You mean, did I bang her? JIM Yeah. DAN Hell, no. I hate whores. FADE TO BLACK. CUT IN: INT. BUS - DAY PARIS HILTON and NICOLE RICHIE (look-alikes, possible cameos) are sitting in a bus filled with poor urbanites, mostly blacks, a few Latinos and whites. Paris and Nicole are singing Madonna's "Like A Virgin" in a loud, high, annoying fashion. PARIS AND NICOLE Like a virgin, touched for the very first time. Like a virgin, with your heartbeat next to mine... A BLACK WOMAN addresses the DRIVER. BLACK WOMAN Please tell them to stop. BUS DRIVER Ladies, you can't sing on the bus. NICOLE Why not? BUS DRIVER It's against the rules. 26. Paris and Nicole look at each other, then resume with the song. BUS DRIVER (CONT'D) Ladies, I mean it! Keep singing and I'll have to throw you off the bus. Paris and Nicole stop. Nicole, a bit peeved, looks at the woman who complained. NICOLE Why are you being so mean to us? We're only trying to have some fun. BLACK WOMAN I've got a long day of work ahead of me. I just want some peace and quiet. PARIS Where do you work? BLACK WOMAN At a warehouse, 12-hour shift. PARIS We're working too, as interns at a day care. BLACK WOMAN That's nice. NICOLE Is that your son? The black woman turns to the BOY (teens) beside her. He is wearing sunglasses, a white tank top and blue bandanna, looking straight ahead. BLACK WOMAN Yeah. PARIS (to boy) What's your name, gorgeous? The boy doesn't respond. Paris turns to the mother. PARIS (CONT'D) (to woman) Is he deaf? BLACK WOMAN He can hear you just fine. NICOLE (to boy) What's wrong? Don't you like girls? 27. PARIS Maybe he doesn't like whites. NICOLE (to boy) My daddy's black. That makes me half-black. If we had a baby, he'd be more black than white. BLACK WOMAN Just leave him alone. PARIS Is he in a gang? NICOLE Omigod! Paris, you can't say that! BLACK WOMAN My son's not in any gang. PARIS What about that blue thing on his head? BLACK WOMAN He just likes bandannas. PARIS Bananas? BLACK WOMAN Bandannas! NICOLE I heard, like, if you wear blue, you're a Blood. The boy turns to Paris and Nicole. BOY Bloods wear red. CUT TO: INT. NEWSROOM - DAY We are watching a newscast. Above and to the right of the NEWSCASTER is a photo of Jessica Simpson. NEWSCASTER In entertainment news, Jessica Simpson confirmed that she does, in fact, have oral herpes. Rumors spread after a paparazzi noticed what he thought was a cold sore and went to the tabloids. 28. In the picture, Jessica does not have a cold sore, only a radiant smile. NEWSCASTER (CONT'D) Jessica said she just wanted to put the issue to rest. "Herpes is an awful disease," she said. "But I have it, and I'll be OK." She said she planned to start taking medication to prevent future outbreaks. "I control herpes," she said. "It doesn't control me"...a brave woman. The photo behind the newscaster changes to the words "Sexuality and You." NEWSCASTER (CONT'D) Coming up in our Sexuality and You series, are you normal or a sick motherfucker? The answer may surprise you. Stay tuned. FADE TO BLACK. Against the black: MICHAEL JACKSON (sound-alike). MICHAEL (O.S.) To all my fans...I must keep this short, as I have just ingested a massive quantity of pills. If they do their job properly, I will die. I'm sorry that I must leave you this way, but I really have no choice. The fact is, I did molest that boy. I've molested several boys over the years. I enjoy it, and they seem to enjoy it, but deep down I've always known it was wrong. I can't go on this way, living a lie. I hope you can understand. I love you all dearly. Goodbye. FADE IN: EXT. GARDEN - DAY Eden - Adam and Steve are lying on their stomachs, relaxing. ADAM So now that you've had a look around, what do you like most? STEVE I like you most. Flattered, Adam lowers his eyes and smiles. 29. GOD It looks like you two are already good friends. An awkward pause, before Steve continues his discussion with Adam. STEVE You're so handsome. ADAM Am I? GOD I wouldn't have created you any other way. Another awkward silence. GOD (CONT'D) What? STEVE Well, it's just that...it's just that Adam and I don't have any time to ourselves. We're never alone. GOD I thought you liked having me around. STEVE We do like having you around, just not every minute of every day. GOD Adam, do you feel the same way? ADAM It's nothing personal, God...but yes, I feel the same way. GOD ...The best I can do is not say anything, so it can seem like you're alone. The men think about it, then shrug and nod. STEVE OK, fine. Whatever. GOD Take as long as you need. The men turn their focus back on each other. 30. STEVE What were you thinking the first time you saw me? ADAM I thought that God had outdone himself. STEVE That's so sweet. Adam and Steve share a warm pause, then Adam giggles. ADAM I also felt something in my penis. STEVE Your what? ADAM The thing between your legs. STEVE Oh - yes, I felt something there too. It felt good, still does. ADAM It's tingly. GOD All right, guys. Let's talk about something else. The men hang their heads in frustration. GOD (CONT'D) Yes, I know I said I'd be quiet, but I can't just sit by while you talk about...well, what you were talking about. STEVE Why not? GOD You and Adam are friends, that's it. Anything else is wrong, and I'll have no part of it. STEVE If loving Adam is wrong, I don't wanna be right. GOD I mean it, Steve. 31. ADAM God, I understand you have rules, and I know how much those rules mean to you. But isn't there any way you could just bend this one a little?
Copyright © 2005 William Wright |