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Fade To Light: In The Light Of A Shadow by Robert G Hagans (2)
"omg i didnt think ya had it in ya rob u actually killed the wentling...im disappointed in u" -- Stills, towson, md, usa.
"So this is what you've been doing for two weeks, writing dumb stories. You have a serious agression problem." -- Mo.


Polar Bear by John G Gorman (3)
"shows promise, liked it overall, i could get a good feel for your head....but the story is confusing and not well developed." -- sunny, DC, DC, USA.
"This is truly a wonderful story. Anybody who has ever worked at a big company can totally relate to what Jason went through. Short and sweet. The twist at the end wonderful, yet bitterly unsettling ." -- Tony Oprisiu.
"Nothing like a crackpot trying to headbutt a polar bear behind a plexiglass. The writing is really poetic. Awesome!!!" -- Maria Veramendi.


Lawson's Last Stand by John G Gorman (1)
"Nifty little sci-fi save the world kinda piece. Yo I think it's pretty clutch sticking slurpees and popes in the same work." -- Anthony Oprisiu.


Goodbye by Shane Cupp (3)
"Well, I'll say this much for you, you've already achieved excellent irony, with the fact that your first hello is "Goodbye"." -- EC Allen.
"isa thinks this here'z a pretty dern kewl piece of really neato writin', sir." -- No Name Rogers.
"Dear Shane,I ilked your story. Will there be a part 2 were Val and Tony visit the asteroid? Just wondering." -- David D..


Tears Of Blood by Amir Mohammed (6)
"This story not only keeps the reader in suspence, it is Frightening!I think the ending is effective, I also enjoyed the oujis board scene. It is a unique style of writing." -- Darren, USA.
"the analogy behind this seductive and horror story is good. i particularly enjoyed the scene where the devil seduces the priest, symblsing irony. i'd say this is a better and more comtemporary version of the exorcist. Read it people!" -- sabir ahmed, birmingham, england.
"Great Read! With tense scenes. I enjoy horror fiction, and stories like this are very entertaining.Well done!" -- Ryan.
"Mostly entertaning, a bit explicit in the bed though? don't you think so MAHAMMED AMIR?. that jewelery all over her body, don't you think it hurt the man who she rubbed up against? " -- Purdeep singh, Walsall, the place where the street,s are clean. unlittered.
"Kia bath he? thuhari story ithni gundi he hum noo shram athi he! Shall i tell you somthing ? well i know where you live samir- i know where you live! Hanibal lecter is on his way to give you something, be pleased! be very pleased." -- Clarisse, Onhio, Hannibal lecters friend, i'm also bilingual, America.
"It was Brilliant.., i loved tears of blood..it was straight up my street in terms of reading! I had an orgasm, it was as if i was watching a porno while reading the bedroom scene.. I was abit aprehenscious when i heard that she was draped in jewels as i thought it could of scratched the nipple and BREAST area!!..but it was great U bristolian..Michelle was the lady draped in jewels hunna?..u go girrrrrrrl!! " -- Tanya Turner, Cheshire, England.


This Flight Tonight by David Godden (1)
"I love it, but then again, I wrote it so I would, wouldn't I? " -- Dave Godden, Geneva, Switzerland.


The Long Way Home by Glen Pearson (3)
"Having been a reader of yours for awhile now Glen, I know how "nasty" some of your work can get, I mean I'm still recovering from the "Barn", so I just wanted to say that I admire you sticking your own warning labels on your stories, though I think any sane parent should peruse the content before letting the kiddies see, especially on the Net." -- EC Allen.
"I offer as further evidence that parents should scan before letting their children see it, the story "Sex Steam Locomotive". And as a warning label: Enter at your own risk!" -- EC Allen.
"More like: Enter at your own "rise". That lil' story... oh hot doggie git mees all excited!" -- No Name Rogers.


Skin by Sabir Ahmed (10)
"This is such a touching piece it bought tears to my eyes. I think the writer is extremely talented, i can't wait to read more from you Sabir. This is exellent!" -- Amir, USA.
"the story creates an atmoshpere of class. i was particularly affected by the suspense and emotions created in the first chapter. hey guys, you better read this. its great stuff!" -- adam, ohio, usa.
""the sex happening in the room next door, made it difficult for Kaplan to sleep" I think this as an opener is somewhat fetish. I think the author has sexual fantasies over Mama Dot. As my Madre used to say " A los cuatro anios comenzo a recibir sus primeras" Adios Sabir" -- Garcia Zubaidah.
"i think this writer is a very sick man!! He is pedantic, in that i feel he has narrow minded perception of black people. The narrator uses obscene language. He has a very disturbing imagination. We are living in society were people are all gaining equal respect, well most are. Sad sentimantal people like "Sabir" the narrator, over endulge in the past making it hard for people like us to move on. " -- Jean Claude Van Dham.
"AFTER HAVING A 6 YEAR HOMOSEXUAL RELATIOSHIP WITH THE AUTHOR SABIR. WE FINALLY DECIDED THAT IT WAS TIME TO END IT. AFTER SABIR HAD PROBLEMS EJUCUALTING. AND NOW AFTER ALL THIS TIME, I MY LOVER ONCE MORE. AS A NOVELIST. WHAT CAN I SAY? I AM SO PROUD. WHY HAVE YOU NOT SUBMITTED THE LOVE AFFAIR BETWEEN, THE TEACHER AND HIS STUDENT? SABIR LOVE." -- AMIT BHATIA.
"THIS WRITER SHOULD'NT EVEN BE CONSIDERED AS A WRITER BECAUSE THIS IS NOT HIS WORK. THIS IS A STORY THAT STEALS ALL IDEAS AND DETAIL FROM "COLOR OF CAURAGE", "BELOVED", AND "AMERICAN HISTORY X" HE IS A FRAUD!!!!!!!! WHAT A LOSER. MY ADVICE, GO GET SOME THERAPY, YOUR ENGLISH IS WEAK TOO. THERE IS MISTAKES IN SPELLING AND GRAMMER. YOUR JUST A FAKE. A BIG FAT ONE AT THAT" -- Cha Cha Mango.
"BONJOUR, ONE WOULD SAY THIS STORY NEEDS A MOAKEOVER. AFTER MEETING THE AUTHOR IN PERSON, I WOULD'NT JUST RECOMMEND THE STORY. YOUR WRITING IS WEAK IN THE SENSE THAT YOU STEAL IDEAS AND ATTEMPT AT COVERING THEM UP. IT DOES'NT WORK! YOUR A THEIF OF LITERATURE BOY! THATS ALL I HAVE TO SAY AURUVOIH!! " -- MADAME LUVURNE'.
"YOU ARE A COPY CAT! COPY CAT, COPY CAT, COPY CAT, COPY CAT. YOUR STORY STORY SUX. BIG TIME!!!!!!!" -- KITTY GENOVE'.
"YOUR STORY IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOO BORING. I FELL ASLEEP HALF WAY THROUGH IT. MY ADVICE IS GET SOME ADVICE. YOU OBVIOUSLY NEED IT. I READ "COLOUR OF COUARAGE" AND YOU COPY, LITERALY EVERYTHING GO LICK A LAMA'S ASS!" -- LOLA DE LA PENNY.
"crap, total crap. it meanders all over the place and is full of sick sexual fantasies. this guy is a TOTAL IDIOT." -- sunny, DC, DC, USA.


No Time For Kisses by Sharon J Grata (1)
"The idea is good. It jumps around a bit. I think it would be a lot better if it was fleshed out a bit more." -- Raye, Michigan, USA.


If I Die Before I Wake by Sarah Levine Sahara (12)
"Absolutely fantastic. " -- Damon, Dublin, Ireland.
"thanks! you made my day!-sarah" -- sahara.
"congrads Sahara! " -- Sarah Cancienne.
"This is a touching piece of writing. At 15? you are very talented. The story has an aura of mystery to it. Its a great Read!!" -- Amir, Birmingham, West Midlands, United Kingdom.
"that story moved me, and i am happy to be her muse....or so i think i am, at least for that piece. love you lee. " -- katers, south louisiana.
"Sarah, good work, it kept me entertained in the bowls of civics class! - good job" -- jo, baton rouge, la, usa.
"Remarkable detail, and don't allow anyone to tell you any different." -- EC Allen.
"You are only 15? Remarkable! Such a poignant and richly visual tale ... I have one story posted here 'Critters', would really like your comments if you have time" -- Judi Goff, Tampa , Fl, USA.
"Well written. You build up the mood of the piece very effectively and you don't make it too explicit: the temptation would be to describe all the details of their relationship and the accident, and this isn't what's interesting to a reader. You stay inside the mind of your central character and let us see the world through her eyes. Quite haunting. A very mature piece." -- David Gardiner, London, England.
"It's impossible to review this as just 'another piece of writing' Normally writing is writing and things like gender, race age and such don't matter, but you can't read this without being aware of your age and not be impressed. This would be an excellent story from someone with a lifetime of living under their belt, to come from a fifteen year old schoolgirl (sorry I hope this doesn't sound condescending I don't mean to be)is incredible. Well done. " -- Sooz, Dalton, Cumbria, England.
"An absolutely brillant piece of work! You should be proud, writing like this does not come easy, at 15, it is remarkable and obvious that you have a natural God given talent. Keep writing, looking forward to reading more from you." -- Monte, USA.
"Wonderful piece of work. You're talented beyond your years. You would perhaps benifit from not using "was" so often. Many times you're "telling" the story rather than letting the reader actually "read" the story. for instance...you wrote: "The sun was setting on that crisp autumn evening and all of the birds had settled into their nests for the night" Try something like this... On that crisp autumn evening the sun slowly dipped into the horizon and all of the birds had settled into their nests for the night. You're letting the reading see the sun slowly setting rather than telling him that it's setting. The above is simply an example of course, and you'll want to find your own voice, but i think this suggestion may help your readers which of course makes you a better writer. Just a suggestion, hope it helps. " -- Scott.


I Was Treeplanting One Day by Darcy K Metz (2)
"Well I would have to say, wow I think I have a new outlook on treeplanting, I could feel the character's frusteration!" -- Katrina, PG, BC, Canada.
"My god, man... What a beautiful representation of human thought. None of that seemed unusual, it all seemed like normal thoughts of any person. I must say that was superbly written. Good job!" -- Crazy Clown.


Haven by Tyler Moretz (3)
"fantistic story will there be more?" -- darlene zimmerman, connelly springs, usa, north carolina.
"this is a great story" -- mark dean, carolina beach, n.c., usa.
"I read Haven for the first time in 2001 and I was imediately drawn in by the word choices. I belive this short story was a compresion, much like the poetry of Dickinson. " -- Tonia, hudson, nc, us.


Final Kiss by James Cartwright (4)
"Wow James, that's pretty good for a young kid whose horrible at writing. I think you're being a little too hard on yourself. I'd say you're an intermediate, although I do understand why you say you need some help. This piece seems to be stuck somewhere between a short story and a poem. I suggest you decide which one you want it to be and then work from there. Starting out you can read some of the selections here on Storymania. Don't let that get you down though. To say that I was mildly surprised by the story's developments would be an understatement. Trust me, once you've cultivated your style and gotten a handle on the mechanics of the short story or poem, you'll be going places. I see a lot of potential here. " -- Michael.
"james- though the actaul mechanics were weak, the plot was awesome! i had no idea what you were alluding to. -sarah" -- sahara.
"This is a very interesting piece. It has involvement strategy. Above all in underlines what we all are victims of, "our emotions can overtake us". I think the tense it it written in is also very affective giving this piece a poetic feel." -- Amir, Birmingham, West Midlands, United Kingdom.
" I want you to know that I liked this story so much I am using it in a performance for a contest speech class. It has sent a chill down my spine every time I have rehearsed it. I hope you continue to write great stories, and maybe venture into poetry." -- Katie, LaPorte, Indiana.


Sell-Out by Christie Bane (5)
"Cool! You go girl! :-)" -- The Cheerleader, Tyna Aberdeen.
"Well... that would explain why it's so difficult for me to get a date." -- EC Allen.
"you being a knobend would explain why you can't get a date." -- Robert o'boyle, Dublin.
"Hey... maybe he's right!" -- EC Allen.
"not as good as your other story. the dilemma and the tears are well presented, but you needed to further flesh out the nature/emotions of their relationship. at what point was it physically and emotionally? that would make the heartbreak of the whole small town thing more moving." -- sunny, DC, usa.


In The Light Of A Shadow by Robert G Hagans (10)
"Not half bad. Some of the dialogue was a little corny, but other than that, very exciting and well played out." -- Kat.
"Well Rob you haven't done half bad, to have 31 hits at the time I'm posting this, and not one response that's truly negative, so I need say no more. Coincidentally, I too am working on a female convict character too, her name's Gridiron, but haven't been able to come up with a satisfying past for her. Who knows I might talk you into selling me the rights to the story. Yes, it's that decently done." -- EC Allen.
""Coincidentally, I too am working on a female convict character too"... "Too" many "toos" EC, you pathetic excuse for a writer! Ha! Ha! Ha!" -- Son of Tyrant.
"Gee, when did Tyrant have kids? Oh well, congratulations Tyrant on the birth of your son, he's real cute, even has his father's misanthropic spiteful nature." -- EC Allen.
"Because we all know I go around correcting people like a grammar nazi." -- Bennett.
"No Bennet, ...errr I mean Tyrant. I have no quarrel with you, just your "boy" apparently. I assume it's no coincidence he's calling himself Son of Tyrant in your honor. Probably just one of my "fans", though I know it's not you, because I know you're smarter than to reply twice, and to reply twice as father and son wouldn't make any sense. Probably just somebody else trying to rattle my chain. I'll leave it at that. " -- EC Allen.
"Here's a bad review: shite, as in what a load of . . . " -- Robert o'boyle, dublin.
"Well kid, you did a good job. I read it a long time ago, but thought I'd read it again and post something. I liked it and I think all your stories (that I've read) are good, but the action starts off right away and sometimes can be a little confusing (or maybe its just me!). Other than that I like it a lot. Good job. *hugs*" -- Raye Brown-Wood, Sparta, Michigan, USA.
"I too am a John Woo fan and your story is obviously influenced by his great films. I would, however, pay close attention to your dialogue. A lot of it doesn't sound right for the character or situation. Otherwise, keep it up!" -- Dave.
"For someone who wants to escape killing, she sure didn't mind PLUGGING BRIAN FULL OF TWENTY ROUNDS callously and without any trace of remorse. I'm not going to review the story, as action stories aren't my cup of tea at all, and I couldn't compare it to what's on the market, but I do know that the talking, dead father is too cheesy and "Lion King"-ish to fit in the scene. *I* didn't like it, but I don't like action stories in general, so I'm going to assume this is a pretty good one (lots of positive reviews are tipping me off) and tell you to 'keep up the good work.'" -- Bennett.


Halfway To Zero by Christie Bane (2)
"Ah!!! Sounds like spring break to me." -- The Cheerleader, Tyna Aberdeen.
"great story! it builds up nicely with the many problems caused by his drug habbits and ends on a nice note. very good finish, which is 9/10's of a good story. btw, this is the second time i've read this story, and i still like it. keep it up. btw, are you the pot smoker ;) ?" -- sunny, DC, usa.


The Sound Of Laces by Sunny (4)
"what a sexist story. obviously you identify with the guy and enjoy thinking up shit like this, because ur pathetic and couldn't get a woman. sicko!!!" -- kungfu_chick.
"not really spot on kungfu_chick (awesome nick)!!! i actually identified with the girl in this one....remember the guy goes down on her in the end and man everyone knows chicks look the bomb in high heels ;) oooohhhh, women in high heels, drool!!!!" -- sunny, DC, DC, USA.
"i actually gave you the benefit of the doubt, by reading this, and now i wished i could get my 10 minutes back. the ending is slightly romantic which doesn't make any sense with the porno theme of your story. and there is no theme or anything. you have some kind of talent which is evident in the peice. you should use it to write something better then this trash. " -- Mya.
"YOU KNOW THERE IS A MAJORITY CONSENSUS HERE, ABOUT ALL OF YOUR WORK.EITHER GIVE IT UP, OR RIGHT RESPECTFULLY." -- Molly.


The Gnome's Feast by Martin John Devecka Dr. Z (3)
"Interesting story, just one thing I didn't understand. Even in the story "Brazil" which is generally accepted as being one of the strangest stories of all time, a handshake sufficed, so why the need for the main character to hug the gnome? unless he was a Russian gnome or something and I just somehow missed that." -- EC Allen.
"Nicely done! You have been hiding stories from your friends, it seems. . . . A disturbing narrative; I enjoyed reading it."" -- Susannah Burrows.
"Nicely done. I do wonder if you used me as your model for the so-called gnome, as he and I seem to share many features; an unhappy coincidence, or an ad hominem assault? I eagerly await your explanation." -- Dwight Kidder, Gary, Indiana, USA.


The Dragon And The Tiger-Bob Gets His W.I.S.H. by Lawrence Peters (3)
"Great !Where does he get these truly innovative wild ideas? A up and comer!" -- joe jungle.
"Best thing I've read on this site, nice one. " -- Damon, Dublin.
"I always see this story when passing through, and promised myself that I would one day read it. I finally have, and I'm glad I did, it's a great story, it truly is. A little ambiguous at the end, but nothing wrong with that. And as a bonus, I finally got to find out what the title meant, which is damn near impossible to do without reading it. Wildlife tales gone awry are my favorite.--The Advisor" -- JA St.George.


That Saturday Night by Alberto Pupo (2)
"Nice job, though it reads more like a screenplay than a short story, but I mean no disrespect by that." -- EC Allen.
"Started out with good possibilities, but I'm sorry to say, too (note the spelling) many typos and lack of punctuation make this difficult to read. It takes the real enjoyment out of reading a potentially suspenseful and powerful story." -- DK.


Quanta, The Liar by Rita A. Lott (1)
"Very interesting." -- I. Rita Lott 2 ... just kidding... EC Allen.


Naked by ~Blythe~ (3)
"crazy!!! i went through this period too, now there's just a hole inside me, hungry and aching for more. technically not well written, but the subject matter was interesting." -- sunny, dc.
"The story's fine. My only comment is that when I read Naked ~Blythe~ I found that impressively erotic.--The Advisor " -- JA St.George.
"the title caught my eye, so i read the story again. i agree with george, the title is erotic, but it fits the story also, which i still like." -- sunny, dc, usa.


Feelings by ~Blythe~ (3)
"That was...awesome. I could feel and identify with the character's/your frantic thoughts." -- Maggie.
"Beautiful as always Blythe, sorry... ~Blythe~, there much better. But my only question is, is the "torch" in your story what Americans like myself refer to as a flashlight?, or is it just an old fashioned torch?" -- EC Allen.
"Yeah!! Like a flashlight! " -- ~Blythe~.


Cherry Icee 'hello' by Tyler Mason (1)
"Excellent stuff, simple as that." -- Damon, Dublin, Ireland.


Changeling by Cailean Darkwater (1)
"I believe you have successfully captured all the faces that a lady wears in her day to day life. Nice job." -- EC Allen.


What Dogs Really Think.... by Darcy K Metz (2)
"This is great--original and funny. Keep up the good work!" -- Amber B Shields.
" Good Story Darcy. I'm sure my dog thinks the same. Keep up the good work. Catch you later Moe." -- Maurice Michaud, Kitimat, B.C., Canada.


The Church by Matt Tracy (1)
"Very nice. It was a tiny bit predictable, but I liked the style. You managed a good bit of character development and irony, and I liked the more human quality of the main character." -- Meg.


There are 27 title entries with reviews on this page.


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