www.storymania.com |
Poetry - Reviews |
|||
|
Short Stories - Reviews |
Pretty Dancer by Harriet Nicholas (3) "The world is full of women/men who are ready to rip your heart out with thier smiles, until you REALIZE thier games and stop dancing to thier tune! Most of us have fallen prey to the kind of person described in your poem at least once!" -- Monte, USA. "I like it. At my age, I frequently cross paths with those of the faded claw variety." -- Richard, OH. "This is an excellent poem! I loved it! You have great insight" -- Wolfa. Troubles With Familiarity by Bruce Anthony Huston (1) "This is very bitter, but powerful. I think it is well written and quite like it" -- Ka_sey. Sometimes I Wonder by Desmond Harris (1) "This was a great poem. keep writting." -- J Harris. From The Heart by John D. Kimbrough (2) "This is a very sweet poem written "from the heart". Great job John, on putting to words what so many of us have a hard time saying aloud." -- Kelly Gatewood, Fort Worth, TX, United States. "Words contrived from the pen that cannot be spoken aloud, speak a beautiful truth. Excellent job, John, expressing your heart through your writing. " -- Lori Oakeson, Arlington, TX, USA. Empty Closets by Richard Koss (22) "Richard, I must admit I like the flow of the poem but I hate the words. You are so filled with hate for something you apparently know nothing about. Perhaps you should research what you don't understand rather then judge it. Going to hell? "Let he that is without sin cast the first stone." It offends me as a "Straight" person to read this. I can only think of how a member of the Gay community would feel." -- Jennifer, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. "Not only was the rhyme forced and rhythm nonexistent, but the irrational anger of the author and the blandness of the message did little to redeem the poem from its sub-fecal state. Things I found most enjoyable/amusing--Your portrayal as homosexuals as a growing "army." The "fruit/recruit" rhyme. The "blades/AIDs" rhyme. The final couplet. They really cracked a smile." -- Bennett. "This is the biggest load of crap I have ever read. A three year old could have written a better poem. The rhymes are incredibly stupid. "Hanging out in some old smelly room" what is that? Are you 12? Maybe someone else in your cult should publish the poems. By the way, I believe that people with hate in their hearts, such as yourself, are the ones going to hell. Didn't you ever read the first comandment? "Love your neighbor as yourself"" -- Heather. "I didn't find this poem to be "filled with hate", as some of the previous reviewers have. The poem, while not a masterpiece, was, I think, written for the same reason most people write poetry. To get their feelings and opinions across. I happen to agree with this poem for the most part, and can only say that Richard seems to have gotten his feelings across, as witnessed by the previous three reviews. I also got his message, but found it refreshingly honest, which is in today's society a rare thing indeed. " -- Tiffany and TJ. "To Bennett, as always, an objective critique on the mechanics of the work. As far as the author's emotions - exaggeration rather than irrationality and frustration more than anger. To Jennifer and Heather, I can only say that you both sound like young, brainwashed products of an educational system designed by liberals to rationalize aberrant lifestyles as perfectly acceptable alternatives. This is only an illusion, for a sizable majority of people in this world recognize, but don't approve of the homosexual lifestyle as a normal or acceptable alternative. Many people don't express their disapproval openly because they are intimidated by the politically correct environment enshrined by the media and our federal government. I quote the definition of tolerance from the dictionary. "To permit, recognize, and respect the beliefs and practices of others without sharing them." This is the best I can offer, but it is apparent to me that the homosexual community wants a lot more; total acceptance, and even admiration from all. I resent watching the increasing trend of movies and television programs which exploit the homosexual experience as something to be accepted and revered, maybe even envious of. It's especially hip for young women to be bi-sexual today. It is also commercially rewarding to promote this and it is certainly no secret that the entertainment industry in general, is inluenced by many successful gay writers and producers. Over the years,I've talked with gay men about the many theories of the root causes of homosexualism - genetics, environment, personal rejection by females, sexual abuse, etc. Like so many others, I reached no firm conclusion. I can only say that I know of no species of animal other than homo-sapiens, who engage in homosexual activity. It is unnatural behavior, whether one believes in a Creator or not. The last line of the poem merely emphasizes this. Like a wake up call. " -- Richard. "Exaggeration? Certainly. With portraying gays as a growing army, you made them look as the legion - now if that isn't exaggeration, I don't know what is. I admit I don't really understand people who jump at your throat, though - you never said anything like "Burn all homosexuals!!!", and some of them (homosexuals) are really boring, trying to make everyone see them as gods. As for animals, I know for certain that both cats and dogs do engage in homosexual activity. " -- Ivana. "I must say, I don't agree with a word of what you said. But I do agree you're entitled to your own opinion. You've got guts, but people have feelings." -- Alison. "I see Alison, so we should never, ever, express any opinion that might hurt someone's feelings. Sensitivy training, that's what I need." -- Richard . "I hope I didn't offend anyone by the spelling typo. SENSITIVITY training. I'm going to enroll in a class with John Rocker, now that he's in Cleveland. " -- Richard. "Wow, maybe I should write something that will piss everyone off so I can get some reviews. Since everyone else that reviewed this poem I from the standpoint of personal politics, I won't. I would have liked to see some more images in this poem, images that would express the emotions that you are trying to convey. I hate to sound like a highschool creative writing teacher, but there is something to be said for showing and not telling. You touched on a few though. I like the sound of the line ...these proud gay blades. Now there is a strong immage that speaks... ...now for the politics (I just couldn't help myself) When you speak of homosexuals as an army, wallowing in decay, preying like vultures on the young, I see fear. But what is there to fear from homosexuals? God will be their final judge, not some misinterpreted line from the bible. God gave us free will to chose good or evil, right or wrong, but homosexuals do not choose to be homosexual. God loves all of his children, shouldn't we love them too?" -- John amos. "Richard - don`t try to suppress your feelings. It`s OK for you want to be with men. Lovely poem. Very funny, could only have been written by a gay man - such insight and humour." -- Gaylord. "Gaylord,C'mon now! On the contrary, only a gay man could make such a feeble attempt to mock my poem." -- Richard. "OK, your rhymes are simplistic, with you having to find meanings for the sake of rhyme eg: "gay rights boom" and "smelly room"; and your argument is objectionable and ignorant, particularly your views on AIDS, which is now a global epidemic, and which the gay community, as one of the first victims of this terrible disease, has done most to address and raise awareness of; also your ridiculous and yet oft held opinion that gay people are "recruited", and seek to recruit others." -- Gaylord. "Gaylord,I've heard all the clicheted gay hype many times over and your not the first fop to consider me homophobic and ignorant. I'll just leave you with a simple analogy to dwell upon. "The gay community is like a social club of physically grotesque members who are doomed to continuously delude themselves and the rest of the world into believing that they are beautiful. " -- RICHARD. "Could you offer any more proof of your homophobia and ignorance? No, I don`t think so." -- Gaylord. "Gaylord, Don't you know any words with more then two syllables besides homophobia and ignorance. You guys are sooo! defensive that you end up labeling everyone who disapproves of your life style as homophobic and ignorant. A phobia is a fear of something, which is why the fabricated word, homophobia, is illegitimate, as any English scholar can tell you. I have no fear of homosexuals or their behavior. I merely find them repulsive, freakish, and without a doubt, abnormal. Despite all your attempts to camouflage your lifestyle as just another "alternative" way of life, you are doomed to wallow in your own rancor. Don't waste my time any more. " -- Richard. "I was wrong... You were able to offer more proof. Incidentally, rancor is your problem not mine. Perhaps you could get an English scholar to explain the meaning to you. There is a word that rhymes with rancor that also seems appropriate." -- Gaylord. "There's also an old word, still much better suited to describe your lifestyle than the word (gay) you've stolen. It rhymes with beer." -- Richard. "Queer is an excellent word. The word "gay" has been associated with homosexuality since the 17th Century at least. Ain`t nothing new under the sun." -- Gaylord. "Okay,I'll be nice and sign-off by saying, "East is East and West is West and never the twain shall meet." You are what you are and I am what I am. " -- Richard. "The traditional or classical definition of the word "gay" in the English language describes such behavior as keenly alive and exuberant, happily excited, merry, bright, colorful, etc. All definitions without sexual connotation. The homosexual community has used the word licentiously,(implying disregard for sexual norms and accepted behavior), hence the use of gay to describe homosexual behavior, with the intent to elevate such behavior, but actually succeeding only in camouflaging that which is aberrant to most of society, in a delightful word, like a nice pretty package, so to speak, with a ribbon around it. Gaylord is right when he says mis-use of the word has existed as far back as the 17th century. " -- Prof. Charles England. "I am just visiting this country while a friend led me to this site called storymania. I found this poem and noticed how much attention it brought. Those unfamiliar with the problems regarding homosexuals in my country and other African nations have never witnessed activists who come here to convert our young people into a homosexual lifestyle. This is the primary reason Uganda is now going to pass strict laws punishing homosexual behavior, which has increased HIV cases to epidemic proportions in our country and other African nations. If people in the USA want to allow these devils to corrupt your country, that is your business, but we will do everything in our power to keep them out of ours. They are an abomination and an insult to God our creator and everyone who believes in Him. No matter the author's intention, this poem contains much truth. " -- Nabute' Mabatta, Uganda. Alphabetized Nebula. by Martin De Leon (1) "yes, thought developed with Language and now the language is binary- heavy heritage from the duality of Jewish mythology- i think you forgot this one- and our feverish need of possession. are you trying to go to the other side of tought, trough the looking- glass and beyond? mmm, nothing but the beauty of cahos there." -- Jorge Freire. A Message To The Exile by Martin Milner (2) "Very thought provoking through your use of words. As a young writer, I look for inspiring poets like yourself. Thank you." -- Bernadette, Trenton, NJ, USA. "Hi, why nobody responds me?" -- Maria, New York, NY, united states. Where I Am Today by Susan T Fisher (4) "I'm afraid that the rhyming in this case seems a little too forced" -- Ka_sey. "Poetry does not have to rhyme but it must have rhythm. You have focused too much on trying to the poem rhyme and in doing so you have lost the rhythm. The words should be roll of the tongue. Your poem would be a lot better if you could just solve this problem. Other than the above, I quite enjoy the way you think!" -- L.A. Israel. "Please note that the word �make� is missing after the fourth word in the second line of the above review. My humble apologies! " -- L.A. Israel. "I enjoyed your poem. I got the point. It says that you can look back and rejoice in where you are today, but it didn't come easy. Keep up the good work!!" -- robin, belleville, usa, illinois. Roamer Of The Night by Vianne-Marie Fortier (1) "good, I don't like velour stages but I like flowers that only grow on the milky way. Maybe a physical description of that stage and dump the ribbon too. But good." -- rivers. It's Nothing Like Our Sky by John Amos (2) "I want to go back to the desert!" -- John amos, Confusion. "I liked Autochrist Supermarket better, I think. This all seems like a mixture of abstract detail and description for concrete visions. I like the way that you can paint such an image in only a few lines. I also find your choice of metaphors interesting as they aren't often used. The title certainly alludes to an entirely different subject matter-very out of the box. I still like Autochrist Supermarket better." -- Tami Lynn, Bossier City, LA, USA. Autochrist Supermarket by John Amos (3) "Well, since no one will give me feedback on any of my poems (That was why I posted them) I guess I'll have to do it myself! Be more concrete next time. I don't think people can connect with any of these poems. (But my other set of poems were concrete and no one reviewed them either!) Don't you talk back to me! (I'll talk back all I want mr. wannabe literary critic! Just who do you think you are?) I'm you and you'd better damn well listen to me if you ever want to get anywhere with this stuff!" -- John Amos. "I really enjoyed this. I'm in a highschool creative writing class and I'm so used to hearing concrete stuff (and writing it, I'm sorry to say)that to read something so abstract is kind of intriguing. I like poetry that makes you think, and this definitely does. Some of it's open to interpretation, but it seems that in some of them you were abstracting on a concrete idea and it leaves the reader's mind to wonder where the inspiration lies. I especially like the collection's title. I also really enjoyed Waking Dreams, Untitled, and For L. " -- Tami Lynn, Bossier City, LA, USA. "Well, what can i say, i really, really liked them, I too need feedback so check out some of mine!!" -- Butaflie Works. Writing In The Dark by Bruce Anthony Huston (3) "I loved your poem. Do you have any other writing to share? I'd love to see it. " -- kevin feeney, editor, San Francisco, CA. "To Kevin Feeney...thanks for the praise. I'd be interested in your thoughts and why you liked the poem. What are you editor of? That would interest me as well. " -- Bruce , San Luis Obispo, CA. "I don't like a lot of poetry, primarily because I don't like rhymes. I think good poetry evokes a feeling that the author gives us by uniquely stringing together his or her words. I've read some of your other poems and I think you're on the right track. In other(uniquely strung together)words, "Ya done good!"" -- Patti, Manchester, CT. Wisdom Sucks by Kathleen McCarthy (1) "I feel the compassion within the poem. And if it was truly written from your heart, I heartily agree with it. It has a way of reaching out to you, and the rhyming seems to roll comfortably off of the tongue. I may be young for my age but I feel the poem expressed itself, and it was in other words captivating." -- Nicola. To Say Goodbye To A Friendship by Kathrine Knickrehm (3) "very emotional and inspirational. a true quality of courage and persistence " -- christine butler, LaPorte, IN, usa. "quaint, humbly lovable, light-hearted and whimsically lyrical--but predictably rhymed. still cute, enjoyable. can i be your boyfriend?" -- finland autrespaes, squentenvogue, rasplatendorff, mufasa. "Breaking up should be permanent." -- R. Bennett Okerstrom. The Muse Speaks To The Writer by Harriet Nicholas (1) "You have heard this probably many times, and you will hear it again, a truly inspiring poem for writers that means to have someone behind them pushing and urging them to go on. I think I will keep this poem close although at times it is a bit repetitive in a sense." -- Nicola. Ruins Of Innocense by Andrew David Johnson (1) "As strange as this may seem to you, because only recently have you began to learn it, peace is achieved by conflit, that is the burden and the privelege of adult life. Your poem is simple, melodic and beautifull as only things that flow from the Soul do." -- Iseldar Kay. Guilt by Harriet Nicholas (1) "How right you are girl, very profound insight for someone so young! Good Job and keep writing!!" -- Monte, USA. Forever 24, Forever Unreachable by T.C. Beto (1) "This almost made me cry the second time I read it too." -- Teresa Hulbert. Caged by Heather Loyd (1) "I like it. It is well paced and well written, but I found the last few lines a bit forced - especially the lines :but another one has already claimed him. So he cannot and will not set you free. The style seemd out of place. I know they are part of the poem. Perhaps you could rephrase them" -- Ka_sey. Adoration Is Not Love by Harriet Nicholas (2) "Right on target, once again you have express wisdom beyond your years!!!" -- Monte, USA. "You are, indeed, an old lady of eighteen years. The words in your poem certainly struck a chord with me. Nice one!" -- Stan. A. Fowler. A Gentle Vision by Bruce Anthony Huston (1) "Poetic & pretty contrasted by the very graphic words whcih I am unsure whether it is a good or bad thing. Still, it is a very worthy poem. " -- Harry, Northampton, United Kingdom. Go to page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 |
|||
| Copyright © 1998-2001 Storymania Technologies Limited. All Rights Reserved. |
||||